As writers, we put ourselves in the shoes of many different people.
We have extraordinary lives, sometimes more than one, but never more than the regulatory nine.
We get shot at, manage to run into cars and miraculously bounce off with only a few scratches, fall off three-story balconies, and sometimes get in the way of stray, and almost perfectly aimed bullets.
Near-death, almost dead, mostly dead, but always, somehow, we come back to life.
But, in reality, this rarely happens. You get shot; you often die. You get hit by a car, or, worse, a bus, you quite often die.
You certainly do not get back up again, leap out of hospital beds, and chase after bad guys.
So, what does any or all of these things feel like in reality?
In my case, I have no idea, other than what I have read, and what I’ve been told by experts it might be like.
But what if…
You are facing what might be certain death?
It’s not a realistic statement, is it? You can’t possibly know when and how you’re going to die.
So, let’s factor in a possibility, and let’s call it Covid-19.
What do we know about it? It is a killer if you have respiratory problems, heart problems, in fact, any sort of problem with organs, and, if you have a weakened immune system.
And, it is far more dangerous if you have any of these conditions and are over the age of 60.
I have psoriatic arthritis and use methotrexate which is an immunosuppressive medicine
It means, in not so many words, I have a compromised immune system. That’s the doctor’s polite way of saying I’m in deep trouble if I get Covid-19.
I now have to face what is most like man’s worst fear: death.
I fit into a category where I have a 40% chance of survival.
There is no cure, there are vaccines but they might also kill me even though the odds are very slim, so really it is simply a matter of the body fighting off the virus itself, and, more or less, wait and see.
To say I’m scared of what might happen is an understatement.
In this country, up till now, we have managed to avoid a disaster, but with the new variant, everyone is all but saying that in a short time that will change … for the worse.
I hope not.
I do not want to have a first-hand experience of what it like to die.