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In a word: Incline

When you first think of this word, it is with a slippery slope in mind.

I’ve been on a few of those in my time.

And while we’re on the subject, those inclines measured in degrees are very important if you want a train to get up and down the side of a mountain.

For the train, that’s an incline plane, the point where traction alone won’t get the iron horse up the hill.

Did I say ‘Iron Horse’?  Sorry, regressed there, back to the mid-1800s in the American West for a moment.

It’s not that important when it comes to trucks and cars, and less so if you like four-wheel driving; getting up near-vertical mountainsides often present a welcome challenge to the true enthusiast

But for the rest of us, not so much if you find yourself sliding in reverse uncontrollably into the bay.  I’m sure it’s happened more than once.

Then…

Are you inclined to go?

A very different sort of incline, ie to be disposed towards an attitude or desire.

An inclination, maybe, not to go four-wheel driving?

There is another, probably more obscure use of the word incline, and that relates to an elevated geological formation.  Not the sort of reference that crops up in everyday conversation at the coffee shop.

But, you never know.  Try it next time you have coffee and see what happens.

Featured

Writing about writing a book – Day 2

Hang about.  Didn’t I read somewhere you need to plan your novel, create an outline setting the plot points, and flesh out the characters?

I’m sure it didn’t say, sit down and start writing!

Time to find a writing pad, and put my thinking cap on.

I make a list, what’s the story going to be about? Who’s going to be in it, at least at the start?

Like a newspaper story, I need a who, what, when, where, and how.

Right now.

 

I pick up the pen.

 

Character number one:

Computer nerd, ok, that’s a little close to the bone, a computer manager who is trying to be everything at once, and failing.  Still me, but with a twist.  Now, add a little mystery to him, and give him a secret, one that will only be revealed after a specific set of circumstance.  Yes, I like that.

We’ll call him Bill, ex-regular army, a badly injured and repatriated soldier who was sent to fight a war in Vietnam, the result of which had made him, at times, unfit to live with.

He had a wife, which brings us to,

Character number two:

Ellen, Bill’s ex-wife, an army brat and a General’s daughter, and the result of one of those romances that met disapproval for so many reasons.  It worked until Bill came back from the war, and from there it slowly disintegrated.  There are two daughters, both by the time the novel begins, old enough to understand the ramifications of a divorce.

Character number three:

The man who is Bill’s immediate superior, the Services Department manager, a rather officious man who blindly follows orders, a man who takes pleasure in making others feel small and insignificant, and worst of all, takes the credit where none is due.

Oops, too much, that is my old boss.  He’ll know immediately I’m parodying him.  Tone it down, just a little, but more or less that’s him.  Last name Benton.  He will play a small role in the story.

Character number four:

Jennifer, the IT Department’s assistant manager, a woman who arrives in a shroud of mystery, and then, in time, to provide Bill with a shoulder to cry on when he and Ellen finally split, and perhaps something else later on.

More on her later as the story unfolds.

So far so good.

What’s the plot?

Huge corporation plotting to take over the world using computers?  No, that’s been done to death.

Huge corporation, OK, let’s stop blaming the corporate world for everything wrong in the world.  Corporations are not bad people, people are the bad people.  That’s a rip off cliché, from guns don’t kill people, people kill people!  There will be guns, and there will be dead people.

There will be people hiding behind a huge corporation, using a part of their computer network to move billions of illegally gained money around.  That’s better.

Now, having got that, our ‘hero’ has to ‘discover’ this network, and the people behind it.

All we need now is to set the ball rolling, a single event that ‘throws a cat among the pigeons’.

Yes, Bill is on holidays, a welcome relief from the problems of work.  He dreams of what he’s going to do for the next two weeks.  The phone rings.  Benton calling, the world is coming to an end, the network is down.  He’s needed.  A few terse words, but he relents.

Pen in hand I begin to write.

 

© Charles Heath 2016-2019

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 150/151

Days 150 and 151 – Writing Exercise

…

It was odd that an unidentified body washed up on shore in a relatively quiet stretch of shoreline.

It was winter, there were very few people about, and the person who found the body had only made a last-minute decision to go for a walk.

As it was, the anticipated rain came early, so it was a grim discovery on an appalling day.

I was well into the second half of the graveyard shift, shortly before dawn, and struggling to stay awake doing the paperwork I had been putting off for weeks.

The phone rang just as I was nodding off.  Surprise nearly saw me fall off the chair.

I grabbed the receiver before the shrill sound set my nerves on edge.  My partner had just left the room in search of some decent coffee.

“Yes?”

I should have answered with name and rank, and ended with How may I help you, but I hadn’t before and wasn’t going to start now.

“A member of the public had reported a body on Wilson’s Beach; uniforms are on their way “

I knew where Wilson’s Beach was, at the end of what used to be an almost impassable track, a short stretch of sand where teens took their alcohol and stupidity for a run.  This wasn’t the first death to turn up there.

And it wouldn’t be the last.

“On my way.”

Not exactly true, I had to wait for Burns to get back from his odyssey.  He would have more success finding Jason, the Argonauts, and the Golden Fleece than finding decent coffee in this building.

He looked disappointed when he arrived back five minutes after I hung up.

“We’ve got a job.”

“A drunk got hit crossing the road?”  That was quite literally our last job.

“A dead body washed up on shore.”

“Let me guess.  Wilson’s Beach?”  He grabbed his coat and walked through the door I’d opened for him.

“How did you know?”

He just gave me one of those looks.

…

It was every bit as dreary outside as I’d imagined it would be, and rain was sleeting down on the vehicle we’d requisitioned before shift.

It was better than the last one, and at least it had fuel in it.  We would not be lucky enough to get one of the electric vehicles.

I turned the heater up and the fan on full blast.  It blasted cold air.  The windows began to fog, a dangerous thing as the first shards of daylight appeared, making it hard to distinguish anything.

Water streamed off the windscreen and sloshed up from under the car, and those passing in the opposite direction.  It was like driving through a tidal wave.

I was expecting more traffic.

Burns was surly at the best of times, a career detective who had only progressed as far as Detective Sergeant because he put family first.

He was one of the better ones I’d been paired with, except for being often regaled with the details of his life, wife, and six children, all of whom seemed to be larger than life. 

At least he had a family, I didn’t, and the wife I had bailed many years ago after the first time I was nearly fatally shot.  I guess you had to have a certain quality to be a cop’s wife.

It wasn’t a morning for conversation.  Yesterday it was Burns’ 30th wedding anniversary, and their youngest child’s 18th birthday, a double celebration.  He had come straight to work from the party.

I knew from his expression where he’d prefer to be.

Details of the case, if any, would magically appear in my cell phone, hopefully before we reached the crime scene, if it was a crime.

…

We arrived to join the collection of flashing lights easily seen in the darkened distance.

From the clearing just off the road, it was a longish twisty hike down to the beach.  Not so bad going down, and an absolute bastard getting back up.

A uniformed officer in a raincoat was on guard.

Oliver, a newly assigned Detective Constable, had been assigned to me to learn the ropes.  He was enthusiastic, but given his qualifications, far superior to Burns and mine, I thought he would be better off as a rocket scientist or jet fighter pilot.

Not standing in the rain waiting to fill in the crime scene details.

It was still raining.

“You look far more awake than I am, Oliver,” I said, wishing I could syphon some of his enthusiasm.

“Nothing like a dead body to liven up what might be an otherwise boring day.”

He handed us the necessary gear so we could go down, and we prepared.

“What’s the story?” I asked.

“Male, between 30 and 40, has not been in the water long.  Initial inspection showed a bump to the head, but not severe enough to assume he was dead or unconscious before entering the water.  My thought is that the victim fell overboard before or after hitting his head and face down, drowned.  Sometimes the simple explanation…”

Oliver was like the Chief Superintendent, both liked closed, uncomplicated cases.

“We’ll know more after the post-mortem, I’m guessing.  Anyone reported missing from a boat?”

“Not that I know of, but I’ll do a deeper dive when I get back to the station.”

We were ready, and Oliver led the way.  The path had been recently hacked to clear away the usual entanglement of shrubbery. Several investigators were picking their way through the edges for any evidence.

At the beach level, there was a defined path we could walk along, about 20 yards to the water’s edge, where a tent had been set up over the body.

More investigators were searching the water’s edge.
.
I stopped at the entrance to the tent.  Doc, the name we gave our coroner, was kneeling beside the body.

After a few minutes, she straightened and looked in my direction.

“Henry.”

“Doc.  What have we got here?”

“A dead body.”

Doc had a strange sense of humour, one I got, but few others understood.  Her medical experience came from a stint in the Army and volunteering in African hotspots.  As well as the obligatory years as an intern in ER, in general practise, and specialising, though I was not exactly sure in what.

Didn’t matter, she had seen everything, and then some.

“Aside from the obvious.”

“Wounds consistent with falling overboard.”

“Pushed?”

“Or fell.  Several contusions to the head, again consistent with a fall.  He didn’t dive in on his own volition, though in the rough seas out beyond the bay, a wave could have picked him up and sent him back towards the boat.  We’ll check the weather and tides.”

“Not a fall from a ship?”

“Possible, but there’d be more damage when he hit the water.  I’ll know more when we get him back to the morgue.  Doesn’t look like he’s been in the water too long.  I’d be getting a list of boats in the area.”

“ID?”

“Nothing.  A John Doe for the moment.”

I took a look at the body and surrounds.  Swept in from the sea, and the person who found the body obviously dragged the body out of the water to check for life signs.

The waves were crashing, and it was rougher further out.  Nothing screaming murder, not then.

Burns had spoken to the person who found the body.  “The dog found it, rather than the owner.  He then dragged the victim up the sand and checked for life signs.  None.  Called the police.  Only one set of foot and paw prints.”

Burns put his head in the tent, took a moment, then came out.

“Not a party animal, not a fisherman.  Just a normal person, like someone catching a ferry home.”

“Except there are no ferries.”

“There is that.  I hate John Doe cases.”

He was not the only one. “Get a photo of his face.  We’ll get Tech to run a check and see if we can get an ID. Also, check the nearest marinas for boats out last night.”

“Roger that.” Two notes in the pad, and back into the tent for a face photo.

Until we knew who he was and where he came from, this was not going to move quickly.  I made sure he sent a photo to the Chief Constable.  We needed his authority to widen the ID search beyond our jurisdiction.

As it turned out, we didn’t have to wait that long.  An anonymous tip was received telling us that the man on the beach was Joshua Stevens.  It came before the 10 o’clock news, and, oddly, it was on the 10 o’clock news.

A text message came from Wendy, one of the tech staff at the station who was assigned to our investigative team, telling me that there was an item of interest in the local radio station’s 10 o’clock news bulletin, and attached was a sound grab.

“The body of a 41-year-old London man, Joshua Stevens, was found on the shoreline at Wilson’s Beach in the early hours of this morning.

“So far, it is not known who Mr Stevens was, or if he had any family, or why he was in the area.  Police are treating the death as accidental, but investigations are ongoing.”

That was it.  It was more than I knew 10 minutes ago, and I  thought it interesting that someone was more informed than I was.

That someone had to be Alison Brentwater, ace reporter for the local Chronicle, and if it could be said I had a nemesis, it was her.

…

Alison Brentwater and I were old sparring partners.  It was not for the first time she had gazumped me in getting the juicy details of a murder suspect, and I often suspected she had a spy inside the station house.

I had her number on speed dial.

“Henry.”

“Alison.”

“Perhaps we should switch places,” she said with that special sarcastic tone she saved for me.

“The pay is terrible.”

“Perhaps not, then?”

“How?”

“I have my sources.”

“I’ll shout you coffee and cake, and we will have a talk.”

It wasn’t the first time she had all but thrown a spoke in the works, and I could feel the Chief Super reaching for the phone.  I didn’t feel like a bollocking, not until I knew more.

“20 minutes, usual place.”

That she didn’t tell me where to go in no uncertain terms, like the last time, worried me.

. .

Petra’s Cafe was off the main street and an excellent choice to not be seen in.  Petra was both Alison’s and my friend from University, the one who preferred being a barista to an accountant.

I was going to be a journalist, but the truth was Alison was so much better at it than I was, so I chose another profession.  It wasn’t being a detective at first, that just came out of left field.

Alison thought it amusing, and typically of her, said she made a better detective, and in her inimitable manner set out to prove it.

She was the sort of girl you could love to hate.  I had once considered dating, but it would not have lasted.  She was too competitive in everything.

Petra was a different story, and I was still considering how I could approach her, given that she did not think as much of me as I did of her.

Petra was serving tables when I arrived, and I deposited myself at the back.  It took a few minutes for her to reach me.

“You’re looking glum?”

“The case.”

“The floater?”  Then she got that look.  “Alison and her spies.”  She shook her head.  “You’re going to have to up your game.  Latte?”

“Double shot.”

“That bad?”

We both saw her coming.  It was not hard.  She wasn’t conventional, still sporting green hair from an undercover reporting job in the city’s more seedy nightclubs.  When she told me, I told her I didn’t want to be woken with the news she had been found in an alley somewhere.

It didn’t go down well.

“The usual,” she said, flopping into a chair. 

Petra smiled, “Good morning to you, too.”  And left.

“How do you do it?” I asked.

“It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.”

I knew she had a contact list that was a who’s who of the city, names that would make up an interesting suspect list if anything happened to her, if that book was ever found.

“Don’t spin me a line.  There was no ID on the body, no distinguishing features, nothing except perhaps dental records, but I fear not even that will help us.  How do you know?

“I briefly interviewed him two weeks ago in relation to an altercation in the Burberry Inn.  Not a police matter, a friend was a victim of domestic violence, I was trying to get something on her boyfriend, and Joshua witnessed him being an ass.  That’s it.”

“He was drinking a pint in the pub?”

“By himself, minding his own business.  I got his name, that’s it.  He wasn’t very helpful.  He had a slight accent, I suspect he was born in England to foreign parents, no wedding ring, reasonably expensive clothes, nervous sort, kept looking in the direction of the door like he was expecting someone.”

“From London?”

“The bartender asked if he was new in town.  He said he was up from London on business.”

“You think his death was an accident.”

Our coffee arrived in paper cups.  Petra obviously thought we were both in a hurry.

“First impressions. But knowing now who he is, it depends on who he was doing business with. I guess I’d better set the wheels in motion.”

“I helped you, you have to help me.”

“You think I’m going to find out more than you.  Perhaps it’s more appropriate for you to help me.”

“We’ll see.”

She put the lid back on her coffee, smiled, and left.

…

By the time I got back to the station, I had Oliver coming back from the crime scene, the body collected and taken to the morgue, and Burns on his way to the Burberry Inn looking for witnesses and CCTV.  Oliver’s first job was to find as much information on Joshua Stevens as he could.

I went to see the Chief Superintendent and advised him on progress, the fact that Alison Brentwater had given us a preliminary identification of the body and the circumstances, and then held my breath. 

I also added that consensus so far considered this the result of an accident, somewhat muddied by the fact that no one reported it, or a missing person within a 50-mile radius, which I’d checked before I got to his office.  I was in the process of checking elsewhere in the country.

He simply wanted the case closed, but also the I’s dotted and the T’s crossed.

An email arrived with a list of missing persons after increasing the scope to Greater London, and Joshua’s name was on it, reported by his brother, and not his wife. 

There were file notes on the interviews with both.  The brother was concerned because they were in constant contact, and he had not sent an email for a week.

His wife said he was often on business trips that were sporadic and of indeterminate length.  She thought he was just being Joshua, though she did say she suspected him of having an affair.  She added that she had no idea where he was, and he rarely called.  It was, I thought, an odd relationship.

I told Oliver to get a hold of his phone records and those of any family members.  They would make interesting reading.

Next, I went down to the wharf where the two boats that offered cruises, fishing trips, and dinner cruises had their offices.

The first hadn’t run any cruises in the last few days.  The second had run three, a fishing trip in the morning, a luncheon cruise, and, after dark, dinner cruises taking in the shore lights.

Margaret Bently, married to the son of the ship’s master and owner of Seaside Voyagers, according to the staff photographs posted behind the counter, was in the middle of a charter booking, city folk looking for an ocean adventure, or so it seemed.

The sales pitch was far more graphically interesting than the reality.  Unless the picture I had in my mind was wrong.

I waited the five minutes before the conversation ended, not quite as expected.  She did not seem pleased.

Putting the phone down, she gave me her attention.

I showed her my warrant card, and before I said a word, she was on the defensive.  “We had nothing to do with anyone washing up on shore.”

To me, that sounded more like they did, but we’re not going to admit it.

“I take it you heard the news.”

“Who hasn’t?”

“Your company ran three tours yesterday.  I would like a passenger manifest for each and proof they got on and got off the boat.”

“Do you have a warrant?”

“I can order the shutdown of this business, and impounding of all your vessels as potential crime scenes, and a complete audit of your operation, as well as a complete audit of your accounts.

“Apparently, the coast guard is about to investigate the possibility of small operations like yours picking up drugs brought in by large ships.  It will only take one call.”

I had seen a memo hinting at a joint operation between services on drug importation, so I simply added a little embellishment. 

She glared at me.  “We have nothing to hide.”  Her tone suggested otherwise.  She pulled a binder out from under the counter and extracted three sheets, copied them and then gave them to me.

Passenger lists.

“Thank you.”

She ignored me.  The phone had started ringing again.

…

The afternoon was taken up with Burns putting together a board that had Joshua Stevens on the centre, his brother Roger on one side, and his wife Stella, nee Williams, on the other.  The photographs were missing.

The timeline working back from the time of discovery on Wilson’s Beach at about 6 am, time of death from 8 pm to 4 am, and before that, not a lot.

I listed Joshua in the Inn and Seaside Voyagers.  Joshua’s name was not on any of the passengers’ lists, but it was possible he could have used an assumed name.  Oliver was going to follow up on all the names.

We needed a coroner’s report, and that was in progress.

Joshua had a very small social media footprint.  In face it was a Facebook page that had an icon and name and little else.  There were no friends or family, and no wife.  It was like he created it and then forgot it.

His wife had a similar page, a photo of EmWonder Woman, not hers, and no friends’ posts. 

His brother had nothing but a name.

It seemed odd that the whole family just didn’t exist, outside a dead body and two ghosts.  I asked the station that took the missing persons report to bring them in and ask more questions.  And get photographs of them.

It was very unusual to be so anonymous.  What struck me as a possibility was that Joshua and his wife were in some witness protection scheme, and he had been flushed out into the open.

There were no newspaper articles about either of them, which was a red flag.  I set Wendy to dig deeper into the mire to see if anything was available anywhere on the internet.

Our board was very scant on details.

…

Before going home, I was called into the Morgue, where the results of the post mortem were in.

Death was not by drowning.  He was not alive before he went into the water.  In fact, he had suffered a severe heart attack and died quickly, not dragged out, and perhaps that was a good thing.

He had lipstick and scent about his person so he had been with a woman shortly before he died.  No clues as to where he had been before ending up in the water, and equally, his time in the water hadn’t washed away the trace evidence.

It led to another possibility: he was murdered on the beach, and that put the man who discovered the body back on the list.

I went back to the office and added more items to the board, including the man who found the body, Jake Williams, and a photo Oliver had taken of him.

It was then that I noticed a slight similarity between him and Margaret at Seaside Voyagers.  And the fact that both shared a surname.

Out of curiosity, I typed in the name Stella Williams and found an old Facebook page with a young photo of Stella.

No mistaking the resemblance.

What were the odds that Stella, Margaret and Jack were related?

…

©  Charles Heath  2026

“The Devil You Don’t”, she was the girl you would not take home to your mother!

Now only $0.99 at https://amzn.to/2Xyh1ow

…

John Pennington’s life is in the doldrums. Looking for new opportunities and prevaricating about getting married, the only joy on the horizon was an upcoming visit to his grandmother in Sorrento, Italy.

Suddenly, he is left at the check-in counter with a message on his phone telling him the marriage is off, and the relationship is over.

If only he hadn’t promised a friend he would do a favour for him in Rome.

At the first stop, Geneva, he has a chance encounter with Zoe, an intriguing woman who captures his imagination from the moment she boards the Savoire, and his life ventures into uncharted territory in more ways than one.

That ‘favour’ for his friend suddenly becomes a life-changing event, and when Zoe, the woman who he knows is too good to be true, reappears, danger and death follow.

Shot at, lied to, seduced, and drawn into a world where nothing is what it seems, John is dragged into an adrenaline-charged undertaking, where he may have been wiser to stay with the ‘devil you know’ rather than opt for the ‘devil you don’t’.

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The cinema of my dreams – I never wanted to go to Africa – Episode 42

Our hero knows he’s in serious trouble.

The problem is, there are familiar faces and a question of who is a friend and who is foe made all the more difficult because of the enemy, if it was the enemy, simply because it didn’t look or sound or act like the enemy.

Now, it appears, his problems stem from another operation he participated in, and because of it, he has now been roped into what might be called a suicide mission.

I was not sure how the Congo commander was going to react when four cars with people who looked more like mercenaries than a film crew turned up at the front gate.

Not that we had the film equipment to use as a cover. I guess that was the reason the kidnappers had removed it from our cars. One less reason to believe our story. I would have been curious to hear just how the commander had described us to his Congo counterpart.

Or what sort of treatment we were going to get. I don’t think the hostages were going to like the idea of becoming hostages again, albeit with a new set of ransom demands, and probably a lot of harsher treatment. Mercenaries could be rough, but they needed resources, and trying to negotiate with overly damaged goods wouldn’t set much of an example.

The Government military, on the other hand, would not be too particular. And capturing an invading enemy force, spies if you will, well, that was going to be a feather in the cap of the airfield commander.

But would he tip his hand at the gate or wait till we pulled up outside the headquarters building. If there was one.

We were about to find out. The gate was in sight and flanked by two very bright lights which we had all seen for about the last half mile, flickering through the undergrowth. The road was well made, and we would have made good time, but I deliberately slowed down to give Monroe time to get into place.

Another brief report from the Colonel told me they reckoned on 20 troops deployed at different parts of the field, just in case we decided to ‘sneak’ in on foot.

At the gate the road widened into a large turning circle for turning back cars.

I stopped right on top of the gate. A non-commissioned officer came out of a small shack by the gate and joined two men standing either side of the gate. Weapons weren’t pointed in our direction, but that could change quickly.

I was going with the film crew going home story first.

“Who are you?” I noticed the officer had a clipboard and made a show of looking at it, and the page underneath. “You are not on my list.”

“Probably not. We have been filming a documentary, and it’s time to go home. We have an aircraft coming in tomorrow morning to pick us up.”

One of the guards came through the gate and went down one side of each car, then came back up the other side, peering in through the windows. Back at the gate, he spoke to the officer.

“You have weapons. That is unusual for a film crew isn’t it?”

Highly, if we were anywhere else in the world. “We were warned about militias. Luckily we didn’t run into any.”

“Then, before you enter the airfield I suggest you, and your men, surrender any weapons.”

“Of course.” I relayed the instruction back through the cars. The soldier then came down the car and collected the weapons in a bag. As I’d assumed, we were not going to gain admission to the airstrip armed. It was probably also a law which in any country made perfect sense.

Once the soldier returned the officer had the gate opened, and came over to me.

“Fill in the form, and we’ll get you on your way soon enough.”

He handed me the clipboard, and then stepped away, taking out a radio unit of his own and spoke into it in a language I didn’t understand. Perhaps we should have kept Jacobi with us for a little longer so he could interpret.

When I filled out the form and handed it back, he said, “Drive up the road about a half-mile to a hanger and park your cars out the front. I suggest when getting out of the cars not to make any sudden or suspicious moves.”

Like we’d been told almost word for word back at the commander’s camp. Interesting.

The men at the gate didn’t follow us, but I did see, coming from two separate points back from the runway, or what looked to be the runway, two groups of five soldiers in each, in a proper formation. That was not the actions of a motley militia.

Serious soldiers perhaps.

It didn’t take long to reach the hanger, quite large, but in a sorry state of repair. Beside it was two old army huts that were in better repair and lit up. At the top of the steps of one stood the commander, a Captain. Clean, fresh, snug-fitting uniform, looking the part. Newly promoted, with something to prove.

With him were another six soldiers, armed and ready. That made 16 plus him. Where were the others?

Another non-commissioned officer came out of the hut and briefly spoke to his commander. Then he went back inside, and the commander came down the stairs to greet me. The rest of the team stood together, in front of the third car, and about 20 feet away. They were trying their best to cover the two hostages.

“Good evening Mr. James.” Reasonably good English, polite, but there was a slight edge to his tone.

“Good evening.”

“May I ask, which way do you come?”

“From Faradje, on the way to Nagero. I was going to drive into Nagero but changed my mind. Best to get here and be ready.”

“I heard there were some elements of the militia on the road. Did you meet any?”

“No. I was told that this country is quite safe and that we would not be harmed, thanks, I’m told to the good services of the Government’s military. You will be pleased to learn that it is quite safe, a point I will be spreading when I return home. Hopefully that will bring in more tourists.”

“If, as you say, you’ve been making a documentary, it seems odd to me that on one hand, you don’t have any equipment, and on the other, that you have not included Garamba.”

“A valid observation. We had to call the shooting off because two of our crew are ill and need to be returned home, and we left the equipment back in Faradje, our last stop, ready for the replacement crew who will be scheduled to fly in, in the next week or so.”

I had considered what I might say and tried to make it sound plausible, but in the end I don’t think it mattered what I said, especially if the other commander had forewarned the Captain of our impending arrival.

“Yes. That may be true, or it might not. I’m assuming the two sick members of your team are over next to the film crew. In that case, I believe both of us know that those men do not belong to your crew, but are escaped prisoners.”

He gestured towards his men and they went over to the group and extracted the two hostages.

Seemingly it was game over.

“So Commander Ntumba called you after we left?”

“Not a lot happens here without my knowing it. It was in his best interest to inform me.”

Something in the distance caught his eye, and I moved my line of sight to match his. Shurl, hands in the air, with two more soldiers behind him, coming from the bush line on the other side of the runway.

Commander Ntumba would also have told him about our sniper, as I’d surmised, and there was no mistaking the look of glee on his face. Outsmarting what he would consider a crack team of mercenaries from the United States.

I turned back and shrugged.

“Yes, he also told us about your sniper Mr. James. You didn’t think he was going to sneak up on us like he did Commander Ntumba did you?”

“It was worth a try,” I said in my best-defeated tone.

“Right. For the time being you will be kept in detention until I speak to my commander. You will not be leaving this airport. Your rescue plane, when it arrives, will be detained. I will have further questions for you later. Film crew indeed. Take them to B Block,” he said to the officer, then headed back up the stairs to his office.

As far as he was concerned, it had been all too easy.

© Charles Heath 2020

Another excerpt from “Strangers We’ve Become” – A sequel to ‘What Sets Us Apart’

…

It was the first time in almost a week that I made the short walk to the cafe alone.  It was early, and the chill of the morning was still in the air.  In summer, it was the best time of the day.  When Susan came with me, it was usually much later, when the day was much warmer and less tolerable.

On the morning of the third day of her visit, Susan said she was missing the hustle and bustle of London, and by the end of the fourth she said, in not so many words, she was over being away from ‘civilisation’.  This was a side of her I had not seen before, and it surprised me.

She hadn’t complained, but it was making her irritable.  The Susan that morning was vastly different to the Susan on the first day.  So much, I thought, for her wanting to ‘reconnect’, the word she had used as the reason for coming to Greve unannounced.

It was also the first morning I had time to reflect on her visit and what my feelings were towards her.  It was the reason I’d come to Greve: to soak up the peace and quiet and think about what I was going to do with the rest of my life.

I sat in my usual corner.  Maria, one of two waitresses, came out, stopped, and there was no mistaking the relief in her manner.  There was an air of tension between Susan and Maria I didn’t understand, and it seemed to emanate from Susan rather than the other way around.  I could understand her attitude if it was towards Alisha, but not Maria.  All she did was serve coffee and cake.

When Maria recovered from the momentary surprise, she said, smiling, “You are by yourself?”  She gave a quick glance in the direction of my villa, just to be sure.

“I am this morning.  I’m afraid the heat, for one who is not used to it, can be quite debilitating.  I’m also afraid it has had a bad effect on her manners, for which I apologise.  I cannot explain why she has been so rude to you.”

“You do not have to apologise for her, David, but it is of no consequence to me.  I have had a lot worse.  I think she is simply jealous.”

It had crossed my mind, but there was no reason for her to be.  “Why?”

“She is a woman, I am a woman, she thinks because you and I are friends, there is something between us.”

It made sense, even if it was not true.  “Perhaps if I explained…”

Maria shook her head.  “If there is a hole in the boat, you should not keep bailing but try to plug the hole.  My grandfather had many expressions, David.  If I may give you one piece of advice, as much as it is none of my business, you need to make your feelings known, and if they are not as they once were, and I think they are not, you need to tell her.  Before she goes home.”

Interesting advice.  Not only a purveyor of excellent coffee, but Maria was also a psychiatrist who had astutely worked out my dilemma.  What was that expression, ‘not just a pretty face’?

“Is she leaving soon?” I asked, thinking Maria knew more about Susan’s movements than I did.

“You would disappoint me if you had not suspected as much.  Susan was having coffee and talking to someone in her office on a cell phone.  It was an intense conversation.  I should not eavesdrop, but she said being here was like being stuck in hell.  It is a pity she does not share your love for our little piece of paradise, is it not?”

“It is indeed.  And you’re right.  She said she didn’t have a phone, but I know she has one.  She just doesn’t value the idea of getting away from the office.  Perhaps her role doesn’t afford her that luxury.”

And perhaps Alisha was right about Maria, that I should be more careful.  She had liked Maria the moment she saw her.  We had sat at this very table, the first day I arrived.  I would have travelled alone, but Prendergast, my old boss, liked to know where ex-employees of the Department were, and what they were doing.

She sighed.  “I am glad I am just a waitress.  Your usual coffee and cake?”

“Yes, please.”

Several months had passed since we had rescued Susan from her despotic father; she had recovered faster than we had thought, and settled into her role as the new Lady Featherington, though she preferred not to use that title, but go by the name of Lady Susan Cheney.

I didn’t get to be a Lord, or have any title, not that I was expecting one.  What I had expected was that Susan, once she found her footing as head of what seemed to be a commercial empire, would not have time for details like husbands, particularly when our agreement made before the wedding gave either of us the right to end it.

There was a moment when I visited her recovering in the hospital, where I was going to give her the out, but I didn’t, and she had not invoked it.  We were still married, just not living together.

This visit was one where she wanted to ‘reconnect’ as she called it, and invite me to come home with her.  She saw no reason why we could not resume our relationship, conveniently forgetting she indirectly had me arrested for her murder, charges both her mother and Lucy vigorously pursued, and had the clone not returned to save me, I might still be in jail.

It was not something I would forgive or forget any time soon.

There were other reasons why I was reluctant to stay with her, like forgetting small details, an irregularity in her character I found odd.  She looked the same, she sounded the same, she basically acted the same, but my mind was telling me something was not right.  It was not the Susan I first met, even allowing for the ordeal she had been subjected to.

But, despite those misgivings, there was no question in my mind that I still loved her, and her clandestine arrival had brought back all those feelings.  But as the days passed, I began to get the impression my feelings were one-sided and she was just going through the motions.

Which brought me to the last argument, earlier, where I said if I went with her, it would be business meetings, social obligations, and quite simply her ‘celebrity’ status that would keep us apart.  I reminded her that I had said from the outset I didn’t like the idea of being in the spotlight, and when I reiterated it, she simply brushed it off as just part of the job, adding rather strangely that I always looked good in a suit.  The flippancy of that comment was the last straw, and I left before I said something I would regret.

I knew I was not a priority.  Maybe somewhere inside me, I had wanted to be a priority, and I was disappointed when I was not.

And finally, there was Alisha.  Susan, at the height of the argument, had intimated she believed I had an affair with her, but that elephant was always in the room whenever Alisha was around.  It was no surprise when I learned Susan had asked Prendergast to reassign her to other duties. 

At least I knew what my feelings for Alisha were, and there were times when I had to remember she was persona non grata.  Perhaps that was why Susan had her banished, but, again, a small detail; jealousy was not one of Susan’s traits when I first knew her.

Perhaps it was time to set Susan free.

When I swung around to look in the direction of the lane where my villa was, I saw Susan.  She was formally dressed, not in her ‘tourist’ clothes, which she had bought from one of the local clothing stores.  We had fun that day, shopping for clothes, a chore I’d always hated.  It had been followed by a leisurely lunch, lots of wine and soul searching.

It was the reason why I sat in this corner; old habits die hard.  I could see trouble coming from all directions, not that Susan was trouble or at least I hoped not, but it allowed me the time to watch her walking towards the cafe in what appeared to be short, angry steps; perhaps the culmination of the heat wave and our last argument.

She glared at me as she sat, dropping her bag beside her on the ground, where I could see the cell phone sitting on top.  She followed my glance down, and then she looked unrepentant back at me.

Maria came back at the exact moment she was going to speak.  I noticed Maria hesitate for a second when she saw Susan, then put her smile in place to deliver my coffee.

Neither spoke nor looked at each other.  I said, “Susan will have what I’m having, thanks.”

Maria nodded and left.

“Now,” I said, leaning back in my seat, “I’m sure there’s a perfectly good explanation as to why you didn’t tell me about the phone, but that first time you disappeared, I’d guessed you needed to keep in touch with your business interests.  I thought it somewhat unwisethat you should come out when the board of one of your companies was trying to remove you, because of what was it, an unexplained absence?  All you had to do was tell me there were problems and you needed to remain at home to resolve them.”

My comment elicited a sideways look, with a touch of surprise.

“It was unfortunate timing on their behalf, and I didn’t want you to think everything else was more important than us.  There were issues before I came, and I thought the people at home would be able to manage without me for at least a week, but I was wrong.”

“Why come at all.  A phone call would have sufficed.”

“I had to see you, talk to you.  At least we have had a chance to do that.  I’m sorry about yesterday.  I once told you I would not become my mother, but I’m afraid I sounded just like her.  I misjudged just how much this role would affect me, and truly, I’m sorry.”

An apology was the last thing I expected.

“You have a lot of work to do catching up after being away, and of course, in replacing your mother and gaining the requisite respect as the new Lady Featherington.  I think it would be for the best if I were not another distraction.  We have plenty of time to reacquaint ourselves when you get past all these teething issues.”

“You’re not coming with me?”  She sounded disappointed.

“I think it would be for the best if I didn’t.”

“Why?”

“It should come as no surprise to you that I’ve been keeping an eye on your progress.  You are so much better doing your job without me.  I told your mother once that when the time came I would not like the responsibilities of being your husband.  Now that I have seen what it could possibly entail, I like it even less.  You might also want to reconsider our arrangement, after all, we only had a marriage of convenience, and now that those obligations have been fulfilled, we both have the option of terminating it.  I won’t make things difficult for you if that’s what you want.”

It was yet another anomaly, I thought; she should look distressed, and I would raise the matter of that arrangement.  Perhaps she had forgotten the finer points.  I, on the other hand, had always known we would not last forever.  The perplexed expression, to me, was a sign she might have forgotten.

Then, her expression changed.  “Is that what you want?”

“I wasn’t madly in love with you when we made that arrangement, so it was easy to agree to your terms, but inexplicably, since then, my feelings for you changed, and I would be sad if we parted ways.  But the truth is, I can’t see how this is going to work.”

“In saying that, do you think I don’t care for you?”

That was exactly what I was thinking, but I wasn’t going to voice that opinion out loud.  “You spent a lot of time finding new ways to make my life miserable, Susan.  You and that wretched friend of yours, Lucy.  While your attitude improved after we were married, that was because you were going to use me when you went to see your father, and then almost let me go to prison for your murder.”

“I had nothing to do with that, other than to leave, and I didn’t agree with Lucy that you should be made responsible for my disappearance.  I cannot be held responsible for the actions of my mother.  She hated you; Lucy didn’t understand you, and Millie told me I was stupid for not loving you in return, and she was right.  Why do you think I gave you such a hard time?  You made it impossible not to fall in love with you, and it nearly changed my mind about everything I’d been planning so meticulously.  But perhaps there was a more subliminal reason why I did because after I left, I wanted to believe, if anything went wrong, you would come and find me.”

“How could you possibly know that I’d even consider doing something like that, given what you knew about me?”

“Prendergast made a passing comment when my mother asked him about you; he told us you were very good at finding people and even better at fixing problems.”

“And yet here we are, one argument away from ending it.”

I could see Maria hovering, waiting for the right moment to deliver her coffee, then go back and find Gianna, the café owner, instead.  Gianna was more abrupt and, for that reason, was rarely seen serving the customers.  Today, she was particularly cantankerous, banging the cake dish on the table and frowning at Susan before returning to her kitchen.  Gianna didn’t like Susan either.

Behind me, I heard a car stop, and when she looked up, I knew it was for her.  She had arrived with nothing, and she was leaving with nothing.

She stood.  “Last chance.”

“Forever?”

She hesitated and then shook away the look of annoyance on her face.  “Of course not.  I wanted you to come back with me so we could continue working on our relationship.  I agree there are problems, but it’s nothing we can’t resolve if we try.”

I had been trying.  “It’s too soon for both of us, Susan.  I need to be able to trust you, and given the circumstances, and all that water under the bridge, I’m not sure if I can yet.”

She frowned at me.  “As you wish.”  She took an envelope out of her bag and put it on the table.  “When you are ready, it’s an open ticket home.  Please make it sooner rather than later.  Despite what you think of me, I have missed you, and I have no intention of ending it between us.”

That said, she glared at me for a minute, shook her head, then walked to the car.  I watched her get in and the car drive slowly away.

No kiss, no touch, no looking back. 

…

© Charles Heath 2018-2025

strangerscover9

The cinema of my dreams – It ended in Sorrento – Episode 64

What is Juliet’s game?

…

Juliet was waiting for me by the car where we had left it.

By that time, I was almost ready to strangle her with my bare hands.

“Where did you go?”

“Away from trouble.  I waited until I was sure you were not going to be killed, then I left.”  She held out the gun by the barrel.  “I figured you would have been able to take that guy without the gun, and there was no point being captured with it.”

She was right, but that didn’t make me any less angry.

I took it and unlocked the car.

“Where are the women?”

“He doesn’t know.  Worse still, he had no idea that another woman was taken at the same time.”

“You believe him?”

“Given the circumstances of seeing the woman who was going to solve all your problems dead on the floor had a way of making you believe.  No one is that good an actor.”

She looked at me with a strange expression.  “You have one working with you.”

“Her mother wasn’t killed in front of her.  Not the same.”

“Square one then?”

“It might be.  If he didn’t know where they were or wanted to, it’s as likely as not they are not on any of his properties.  If he didn’t care what happened to the countess, that doesn’t mean the same for those who are holding her, or Mrs Rodby.  They’ll know, eventually, a reward will be offered, and we’re giving them one.”

I called Cecilia.  “How’s the search going.  I assume the fact you haven’t called me means you’ve found nothing?”

“Zip.  This Dicostini has a lot of dud property.  Maybe someone should tell him to build a resort rather than try to grow grapes.  There’d be a lot more money in it.”

“I think he has more problems than that to worry about right now.”

“How did you go?”

“Kept the place under surveillance, waiting to see if the fake countess was hiding at his place.  She was.  She came out, and they had an argument. And he killed her.”

“What?  Shot her?”

“He hit her in a moment of temper, she fell awkwardly, hitting her head on the table, dead before she hit the floor.”

“That makes things a little difficult.  I assume you didn’t get the location of the two women?”

“You assume correctly.”

“Then they could be anywhere?”

“Maybe, maybe not.  I’m going to give you a name and address.  Get onto Anthony and find out where he lives, then park yourself outside until you hear from me.  I have a hunch, but be prepared to waste some time if it doesn’t pan out.  Take Alfie with you.  Leave Francesca, there’s nothing she can do now.”

“What are you planning?”

“Offering a huge reward for Mrs Rodby.  I think we can safely say the countess is either dead or will be when Dicostini calls the kidnappers.”

“Wouldn’t they just kill her too?”

“They might, but if they’re good, that won’t be a problem.  Getting a bigger payday is.  Everybody has a price.”

“Even you?”

“When I figure out how to disappear, maybe.  Go.  Time is wasting.”

I thought about starting the car, then didn’t.

It was not enough that so many different scenarios were running through my head when the call finally came.  I was sure now the main game was over, the side players would be looking for a slice of the action.

There were only two candidates.  One seemed improbable, which made it the more likely, the other the logical choice, but unlikely.  It all depended on how fast Anthony could get the wanted poster out there.

In the meantime, I had another more perplexing problem.

“What are you doing here?” I asked Juliet.

She looked at me strangely.  “You asked me.”

“I mean, what are you doing here in Italy?”

She kept looking at me as if I were mad.

“I was setting up for a conference.”

She looked earnest, but there was something in her manner.

“Are you really that pathologist.  I mean, for a down-and-out doctor, how could such a disgraced person get a foot back in the door?”

Her look of bemusement turned to annoyance.  “Tell me what you really think?  It took a lot of banging on doors and grovelling.”

I shook my head.  That wasn’t the whole story.

“Why, so I keep running into you?”

“Fate.  Serendipity.  The universe is telling us we didn’t end things properly the last time.”

Words.  Words that had a certain ring to them.  I shook my head. 

“Fate is a load of bollocks, Juliet.”

“You can call me Julie if you like.  It sounds better.”

“This is not done with, not by a long chalk.”

…

© Charles Heath 2023 – 2026

The 2am Rant: It’s good, it’s bad, and at times it can be very, very ugly

It was as if Microsoft Word was sent down from that place in the universe where a group of torturers sit around a table to find new ways of making our lives just that little bit more difficult.

I mean, most of the time it works really well and behaves itself.

But…

Then there are the times, usually when you are stressed about a deadline, or you are nearly at the end of what you believe to be the most brilliant writing you have ever put on paper.

Then…

Disaster strikes.

It could be that the power goes off, even for just a few seconds, but it’s enough to kill the computer.  It could be that you have reached the end and closed Word down, thinking that it had autosaved, all the while ignoring that little pop-up that says, ‘Do you want to save your work’?

It’s been a long day, night, or session.  You’re tired, and your mind is elsewhere, as it always is at the end.

You always assume that autosave is on.  It was the last time; it has been since the day you installed it, however long ago that was.

So…

When the power comes back on, you start the computer, go into Word, and it brings back all the windows you had open when the power failed, and the one with the brilliant piece you just wrote, it’s just a blank sheet.

Or up to where it last autosaved, which is nowhere near the end.

Or it didn’t save at all.

You forget the software was updated recently, and that always brings changes.  Usually, unwanted changes.

By which time you have that sinking feeling that all is lost, deadline missed, brilliant work lost, it’s the end of the world.

You promise yourself you’re going to get Scrivener, or something else, where this doesn’t happen.

Or if you’re like me, you put the cat on the keyboard and tell him to sort the mess out.

What I learned about writing – Storytelling

More Than Just Words: Why We’re All Hungry for Stories

Ever found yourself completely engrossed in a book, a captivating film, or even a friend’s animated anecdote? There’s a reason for that. It’s not just our idle entertainment; it’s a primal, fundamental part of who we are. We are, quite literally, hardwired for stories.

Think about it. From the earliest cave paintings depicting hunts and rituals to the grand epics passed down through generations, humanity has always relied on narrative. It’s how we make sense of the world, how we connect with each other, and how we leave our mark.

The Ancient Art of Immortality

At its core, storytelling is a form of history. It’s how we preserve the experiences, the triumphs, and the struggles of those who came before us. Before written records, oral traditions were the lifeblood of cultures, passing down knowledge, wisdom, and identity. The stories of elders became the lessons for the young, the myths explained the inexplicable, and the legends inspired courage.

But it’s more than just a historical record. Storytelling is also a profound act of immortality. When we share a story, we breathe life back into memories. We keep alive the spirit of individuals, the essence of moments, and the impact of events. A well-told story can transcend time, allowing us to feel present with people who are no longer with us, to understand perspectives different from our own, and to learn from their journeys. It’s through stories that our ancestors, our heroes, and even our ordinary lives can continue to resonate in the present and echo into the future.

Feeding the Soul

Beyond its historical and immortalising qualities, storytelling simply feeds our souls. In a world often characterised by fleeting information and digital overload, a good story offers depth, connection, and emotional resonance.

  • Connection: Stories allow us to step into someone else’s shoes, fostering empathy and understanding. They remind us that despite our differences, we share universal human experiences – love, loss, fear, hope.
  • Meaning-Making: We use stories to process our own lives and the complexities of the world around us. They help us identify patterns, understand causes and effects, and find meaning in the chaos.
  • Inspiration: Stories of resilience, innovation, and courage can ignite our own imaginations and empower us to pursue our dreams. They show us what’s possible.
  • Escape and Joy: Sometimes, we just need to get lost in a different world. Stories offer a welcome escape, a chance to experience adventure, romance, or mystery, and to simply find joy in a well-crafted narrative.

The Power is in Your Hands (and Voice!)

So, the next time you’re drawn to a narrative, remember you’re tapping into something ancient and essential. And even more importantly, remember that you, too, are a storyteller. Your experiences, your memories, your unique perspective – they all have the power to inspire, to connect, and to offer a piece of yourself to the world.

Don’t underestimate the stories you hold. Share them. Write them down. Tell them to your children, your friends, your colleagues. Because in a world hungry for connection and meaning, every story is a gift, a tiny act of immortality, and a vital thread in the rich tapestry of human experience.

365 Days of writing, 2026 – My second story 21

More about my second novel

…

Zoe is now painfully reminded why she did not get involved with other people, why it was better to be responsible only for herself.  It was easy, perhaps to blame John for making his own problems by not heeding her advice, but, just the same, she felt a small shred of responsibility for his current situation.

After learning that John has been kidnapped by Olga, Zoe first goes to see an old colleague, and Yuri’s friend, Dominica to interrogate her, then meets up with Yuri, and it does not end well for one of them.  After telling her he’s the elusive Romanov, Yuri informs her of the fact that Olga has taken John and that Worthington is about to use John’s mother as leverage against her.

Not knowing immediately where Olga is, but believing she will not kill him because Zoe will come to her, she detours to take care of Worthington, having finally realised why he was searching for her.  In another of her many disguises, room service visits his room, and Worthington gets more than dinner served up to him.

Of course, Yuri lies. He is not Romanov, and Romanov is not trying to kill her, but find her.

Who is she? Well, you’ll have to read the book to find out.

And, as for Olga, well, hell hath no fury than a woman avenging a woman avenging her son!

…

Top 5 sights on the road less travelled – London

London’s Secret Charms: 5 Uncrowded Gems with Unforgettable Features

London. The very name conjures images of iconic landmarks, bustling streets, and a vibrant energy that pulses through its historic veins. But let’s be honest, that energy often translates into crowds – a beautiful, diverse, fascinating crowd, but a crowd nonetheless.

What if you yearn for a different rhythm? A London where you can connect with history, art, and nature without constantly jostling for a view? A London where distinctive features truly shine, allowing you to savour every unique detail?

Fear not, intrepid explorer! I’ve curated a list of five phenomenal London attractions that deliver on distinctive character without the typical tourist throngs. These are the places where you can breathe, ponder, and truly absorb the magic of this incredible city.

1. Sir John Soane’s Museum: A Collector’s Labyrinth of Wonders

What makes it distinctive? Imagine stepping into the mind of an eccentric 19th-century architect, where every surface, every nook, and every cranny is crammed with art, antiquities, and architectural fragments. Sir John Soane’s Museum is not a typical museum; it’s a meticulously preserved house that he designed to display his vast and eclectic collection exactly as he wanted it. Expect a fascinating, almost overwhelming, visual feast. Highlights include an Egyptian sarcophagus, a room of hidden paintings on hinged panels, and ceilings adorned with fragments of Roman sculpture.

Why it’s uncrowded: Its very nature – a house packed to the rafters – means visitor numbers are carefully controlled. It’s a small, intimate space, encouraging quiet contemplation rather than rapid sightseeing. You’ll often find yourself with plenty of room to explore.

Insider Tip: Look out for the “picture rooms” where walls literally open up to reveal more art behind them. It’s a delightful, theatrical surprise!

2. The Wallace Collection: Opulence and Masterpieces in a Grand Mansion

What makes it distinctive? Housed in Hertford House, a magnificent stately home in Marylebone, The Wallace Collection offers a truly unique experience: a peerless collection of 18th-century French art, furniture, porcelain, and old master paintings, all displayed in the sumptuous setting of a historic private residence. It feels less like a public gallery and more like you’ve been invited into a wealthy collector’s home. From rococo masterpieces like Fragonard’s “The Swing” to an impressive armoury, the sheer quality and variety are astonishing.

Why it’s uncrowded: While well-known, it often gets overlooked in favour of the larger, more public museums. Its location, slightly off the main tourist drag, also helps keep numbers manageable. Plus, it’s completely free to enter!

Insider Tip: Don’t miss the stunning central courtyard, which has been beautifully enclosed to create a light-filled restaurant – perfect for a refined coffee or lunch break.

3. Chelsea Physic Garden: London’s Oldest Botanic Oasis

What makes it distinctive? Tucked away behind high walls near the Thames, the Chelsea Physic Garden is a living museum of plants with a fascinating history. Established in 1673 by the Worshipful Society of Apothecaries, it was created specifically for the study of medicinal plants. Today, it’s a tranquil four-acre oasis showcasing around 5,000 different species, including the largest fruiting olive tree in Britain and the world’s most northerly grapefruit tree. It’s a place where history, science, and nature intertwine beautifully.

Why it’s uncrowded: It charges a modest entrance fee and isn’t on the primary tourist routes, ensuring a peaceful atmosphere. It’s a favourite among locals seeking serenity, rather than a must-see for first-time visitors ticking off landmarks.

Insider Tip: Check their website for workshops, talks, and guided tours which offer deeper insights into the garden’s extensive collections and history.

4. St. Dunstan in the East Church Garden: A Ruined Beauty Reclaimed by Nature

What makes it distinctive? This is perhaps one of London’s most visually stunning “hidden” gems. What once was a grand medieval church, later rebuilt by Sir Christopher Wren, was largely destroyed during the Blitz in 1941. Instead of rebuilding, the ruins were transformed into a public garden. Ivy-clad walls, elegant Gothic arches, and a Wren tower now frame a vibrant collection of trees and plants. It’s an ethereal, almost magical space that perfectly blends history with nature’s resilience.

Why it’s uncrowded: Despite its proximity to the Tower of London and Monument, it’s tucked away down a side street, making it easy to miss if you don’t know it’s there. It’s a favourite spot for city workers on their lunch break and photographers, but rarely overwhelmed by tourists.

Insider Tip: Visit on a sunny day when the light filters through the archways and foliage, creating a truly enchanting atmosphere. Find a bench and simply soak in the tranquility.

5. Leighton House: An Artist’s Victorian Fantasy

What makes it distinctive? Step into the fantastical home and studio of Victorian artist Frederic, Lord Leighton, and prepare to be mesmerised. The crowning glory is the “Arab Hall,” a breathtaking space inspired by Leighton’s travels to the Middle East. Adorned with over 1,000 iridescent Islamic tiles, a golden dome, and a tranquil fountain, it’s like stepping into a dream. Beyond this, the house offers beautiful period rooms, Leighton’s grand studio, and a collection of his and his contemporaries’ art. It’s a truly unique architectural and artistic vision.

Why it’s uncrowded: Located in Holland Park, West London, it’s a little further out than central attractions, which naturally reduces footfall. It also requires a timed ticket, ensuring a pleasant visitor experience.

Insider Tip: Look closely at the tiles in the Arab Hall – many are original 16th and 17th-century pieces, carefully acquired by Leighton himself.

So, the next time you find yourself in the magnificent city of London, consider taking a detour from the main thoroughfares. These five distinctive, uncrowded attractions offer a chance to connect with a different side of the capital – one that’s rich in history, beauty, and quiet wonder. Happy exploring!

Have you discovered any other uncrowded London treasures? Share them in the comments below!

In a word: Great

Or is it grate?

Is it possible to mix the two up?  I don’t think so.

Great usually means: everything is great, or good, or excellent, whatever degree of goodness you want to put to it.

It could also mean something else, like:  Well, you were a great help! when in fact you want to say how useless they were.

Large or little.

Like all creatures great and small,  Why not say big or small.  Big doesn’t quite have the same effect.

Of course, you could be a great person, well, what I really mean is distinguished.  Besides, great could mean way above average, too.  Or grand, or impressive, the list goes on.

And haven’t we all, at some time had a great-aunt.  No not the good one, the ‘great’ one, denoting her seniority, not necessarily how nice she is.

 

As for the other grate, we can build a fire in it.

Or add an ‘un’ in front and ‘ful’ at the end, to denote what parents sometimes think of their children

Or get a block of cheese and ‘grate’ it into small shreds.

Or speak in a voice that grates on your nerves, possibly by that great-aunt.