This is Chester. Somehow he has worked out it’s Christmas.
He comes down to the office and discovers I’m not there. I can hear him wandering around until suddenly I realise there is a presence in the kitchen doorway.
Chester, a mischievous look on his face, sitting and waiting.
Waiting for what? I stupidly ask why, and almost instantly regret it because I know what’s coming.
You’ve blocked off the path to my basket, again. Why have you got a tree growing in the house?
You know why.
You mean to say it’s Christmas again. I thought we got that over with years ago.
No, it happens every year.
So, what’s in the pretty coloured paper boxes?
Oh, is there one for me?
Several actually. Everyone decided to get you something this year. Especially since you decided to let the grandchildren pat you.
I see him visibly shudder.
Once doesn’t mean forever.
You want those presents?
He wanders off towards the tree, and I can see he’s working out if he can climb it. He had tried before with another tree, and I will not detail the mess that turned out to be.
I come out of the kitchen, and see him sitting a few feet away.
Chester, I say sternly, there will be no climbing the tree, am I understood.
He turns his head. OK. No climbing the tree. He heads off towards the new location for his basket.
Next morning, questions need to be asked. Decorative balls on the ground, and tinsels bits in his bed.
Good thing then he’s missing. I’ll be just another problem to deal with Christmas morning.