365 Days of writing, 2026 – 66/67

Days 66 and 67 – Writing exercise

Take a moment in your past, and turn yourself into a character and express your feelings about it

Some things happen that happen for a reason, even though at the time we do not understand the why, only that the result was not what we expected.

Sometimes that is a negative, and causes pause for thought the next time it happens.  Or it is a positive and sends us in a direction that is borne out of experience.

I am by nature an introvert, the sort of person who keeps to himself.  I learned the hard way to mind my own business and not interfere.  The physical scars had healed, but the mental scars are much harder to recover from.

School taught me that trust is not given freely and that it has to be earned.  Of course, the hurdles to get there are often almost insurmountable, but in the end, you learn one of life’s very valuable lessons.

When I graduated from school, not exactly at the top of the class, not the bottom, but it was enough for me to realise I was not suitable material for college or university.  That being the csse my choices were limited.

Stay on the farm and work alongside my father and some of my brothers and sisters, find a job in town, like a storeman at the hardware; or a general hand in one of the fast food outlets. 

Then there was the factory, where eventually all of us, without any schooling, ended up. It was tedious and back-breaking work, but no one questioned your past, your education, or your work ethic.

It was like the army.  You just slotted in and did your bit and didn’t let anyone down.  It suited me, I didn’t have to mix, and I was left alone, even by those who were from school and definitely not my friends.

That took care of the days.

Then there was Friday night at the bar, a rowdy place with everyone having what might be called a good time for some, and for others, a little sport. 

It could get rough; some of those who drank too much became violent, but mostly you were happy, had dinner, a few drinks, shot pool, talked about everything and nothing and then went home.

At first, I avoided it.  I had been drunk before, but that was at home, the typical I’m going to try everything once, and it wasn’t a good experience.  Seeing others so, without inhibitions or quick to temper, your night could very easily end up in the emergency ward at the hospital.

I’d been there a few times when my brothers got on the wrong end of the argument.  That and a night in the sheriff’s cells for drunk and disorderly.  Once was enough, if you learned the lesson.  Quite a few didn’t.

So, having avoided it long enough, I agreed to go with a couple of other chaps with a similar reluctance.  We had been the guys the football jocks beat up on because they could.

Of course, in the year after leaving school and working at home until I couldn’t take my father or eldest brother riding me, I learned how to defend myself.  It was something I should have done at school, but couldn’t.  I needed money, and no one at home would pay. 

Going to work elsewhere, I quickly discovered, gave me independence and the ability to begin living my own life, mistakes and all.

Joe’s Bar and Grill was in a huge barn at the edge of town on the main road out.  It had been there as long as anyone could remember, as far back as the days when the railway arrived, and the ranchers could send their cattle on.

One of those places where the country met the rail head, cattle going out and people coming in.  For a while, it drove the town into a city.

The cowboys would stay until the money ran out, and then everything went back to normal.  In between times, the townsfolk, what was left of them, spent Friday night, the traditional end of the working week, letting their hair down, and Saturdays, where families celebrated together in a more convivial atmosphere.

Friday night was where it all happened.  The night wore on, and the drinks were flowing, which started off noisy and sometimes turned ugly.  It’s why the deputies were on hand to make sure it didn’t get out of hand. That was the theory.

Alex, Will and I, with a name like Ken, the three musketeers, had all landed jobs at the factory.  We didn’t work together, but we all met up at breaks.  We kept out of everyone’s line of sight and did our jobs.

It was Alex’s idea that we go.  Have a few drinks, see who was there and who wasn’t, and if truth be known, Alex was looking for Lola.

That last year of school, he had a thing for her, but she was more interested in the athletic types, and I could have told him he was wasting his time.  But the lovelorn will not accept advice readily, and he came to grief.  When he asked her to be his date at the prom, she just laughed at him.

Will and I knew better than to waste our time.  Of course, we were not immune to those first pangs of romance.  I dabbled, asking oblique questions of what I thought was an exile from the mean girls, Lizzie, but discovered quickly she was unavailable.

Fair enough.  I had the sense to walk away.

I’d since learned that her aspirations for college had run aground her parents’ end of downsizing, and left with the same opportunities as most who found themselves on the unemployment line.

There seemed to be more and more of these days, along with the shuttering of stores on the main street. 

And despite everything that had happened, and the likelihood of what might happen, we arrived, parked the truck, got out and surveyed the scene before us.  Crowded, noisy, and a powder keg waiting to explode.

I counted half a dozen cruisers and ten deputies I could see, hanging back, waiting.

Four pick-ups in a convoy arrived and parked out front.  Spaces reserved for the management and VIPs.

“No show without punch, eh?” Alex muttered.

One might have regarded Sam Blackstone as a VIP, but his father was some big shot back east, and Sam somehow believed her was the prodigal son.

He made the big league, got drunk after his first big game, tripped and fell down the stairs, and now had a permanent limp and nothing to brag about

Other than the big shot father who never came home.

But that didn’t stop him from being the leader of a bunch of entitled guys who basically did what they pleased.

We avoided them.

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” Will said.  “Remember the last time?”

I think we would.  We got our asses handed to us.

“It’s different this time.”  Alex wasn’t going to forgive or forget.  He attended the same self-defence classes that the three of us did.

Will and I were there for self-defence, Alex was there for vengeance.

“I think Will’s right,” I said, hoping to save him from himself, but judging by his posture and expression, reasoning was out.

“You go.  I can do this.”

Will and I looked at each other and shrugged. Alex, on his own, would only get so far.  As the three musketeers, we might just get out alive.

Joe’s Bar and Grill was Sam’s home turf.

Four trucks, one boss and seven mates.  I’d heard about their antics, second-hand from my sister, Will
Eileen, whose best friend was Lizzie, yes, that Lizzie, whose older brother was a deputy.

Well, it is now back to being a small town where everyone knew everyone else.

Last advice, Sam had finally worn out the new Sheriff’s patience. Times had changed, the old sheriff got voted out after a corruption charge was brought against him, not proven, but the local folks figured it was time for a change.

The memo hadn’t reached Sam.  Yet.

Alex started walking towards the front entrance.  I shrugged.  “In for a penny…”

Will just sighed.  “This is going to be fun.”  The way he said it, I knew what he meant.  This was going yo be anything but fun.

Dodger, the nickname we gave to the guy on the door, was from the fact that when the fighting started, he disappeared.

“You guys ain’t been here for a while.”

“Nope,” I said.  “And judging by the noise, nothing’s changed much.”

“We’ve got a bucking bull.”

He was taking us literally.  On Dodger could do that.  The other door guys would have just ignored us.

“I’ll be sure to check it out,” I said.

Past the threshold, it was wall-to-wall people.  Such was Joe’s fame that people came from far and wide.

In front of us, the bar, which stretched from the front to the back, was double-sided.  One side served the pool tables and the bucking bulls, the other tables, and further back, the dance floor.

A gun could go off, and no one would hear it.

“I’ll get a table, you two get drinks and try to stay out of trouble.”  He disappeared into the fog

We went to the bar.  Men served the drinks, the girls delivered them to the tables, and there was also a mix of ‘get your own’, or ‘have it served at your table’, giving the girls a tip.

I heard a rumour that Lizzie and her friends worked as waitresses on Friday and Saturday, the tips adding nicely to their bank accounts, despite the unruly and sometimes bad behaviour of certain customers.

I got the first round, and we went into the fog, and minutes later stumbled into the table where Will was sitting.  A waitress, not Lizzie, came past and slopped a wet rag over the table top and kept going.

We sat.

“Where did Sam go?  I didn’t see him when I was at the bar.”  Will might have seen him on his way to the table.  A shake of the head said no.

“What do you want to know for?”

“So trouble does sneak up on us.”

I was not sure why I was so worried.  We were too small for him to be bothered with.

And by the time an hour had passed, we were approaching the bewitching hour, so named because it was about the time those who had too much and were supposed to be elected by management started to arc up.

The crowd had thinned, but there were still a lot of people there.  The line dancing was getting a little erratic as the booze started to take effect, and already one skirmish had broken out.

The deputies appeared and escorted the guilty to the van and taken to the drunk tank.  It was a sombre warning to others

We had shifted to the bar, and that’s when I saw Lizzie.  She came back and was not far from us.  She looked tired and oddly dishevelled.

And angry.

I slid off my chair and went over.

When she turned, I said, “How are you, Liz?”

I remembered just in time that she hated being called Lizzie.

“How do you think I am?”  It exploded out of her.  Something had happened.

“I know you don’t like me, but that’s a bit strong when a ‘I’m fine, piss off’ spoken politely would have sufficed.”

I turned to go back.

“Sorry.”

I stopped and turned. 

“I’m having a bad night,” she said, sadly, like it was a permanent fact.

“Wouldn’t that be every Friday?”

“No, only those when Sam and his thugs come.  Thinks he owns the place, and that we are at his beck and call.”

“Be worth the tips.”

She snorted.  “Insults, maybe.  Not money.  Not anything.”

“You’re his gopher?”

“And Sally, and Brigitte.  I don’t think there’s a girl under 25 he hasn’t had his way with.  But it’s our own fault for believing the scumbag.”

The barkeep put a tray of drinks on the bar.

“Gotta go.  Ken, isn’t it?  You dodged a bullet, Ken.  I’m not worthy of anything or anyone any more.”

A last look, this one carrying so much despair it nearly brought me to tears.

I had hoped I would miss Sam, but if he was the one who had broken Lizzie, then I was going to make it my mission to break him.

A little more than he already was.

He was down the back, in a booth, flanked by thugs and sitting with three fresh faces, girls who had not experienced the Sam charm offensive.

I watched Lizzie drop the tray on the table, knocking over a bottle, and everyone watching it roll onto his lap.

Silence.  In this corner.

She apologised.  He picked up the bottle and looked like he was going to throw it at her. She flinched in a way I knew this was not the first time, and that was when I said, “You do that, Sam, and it’ll be the last thing you do tonight.”

Three things happened.

First, the two thugs and the two girls got out from behind the table faster than I’d ever seen anyone move, the girls moving away, the thugs positioning themselves so I couldn’t run.

My intention wasn’t to run, but always have an exit just in case.  I picked one.

I motioned for Lizzie to step behind me, and after a moment’s hesitation, she did.  I thought Sam might stop her, but he didn’t.  He had a bigger fish to try.

Second, four of his other thugs came running, but in the crowd, which seemed to close up, it was hard to make headway.  Then Will and Alex appeared, and with two quick and subtle moments, the four were on the floor writhing in agony.

They had simply used their momentum and excess weight, and the degree of intoxication against them.  They took up positions near the two thugs who had been sitting at the table.

Third, the crowd closed in, making it impossible for the deputies to get through.  There was something in the air, and it wasn’t support for Sam.

Not that he would have seen it that way.

Slowly, and very deliberately, he slid out from behind the table and stood.  There was no doubt he was an impressive size, six inches taller and fifty pounds or more.

Enough to scare anyone into submission.

Except he had one weakness.

He came around to the front of the table and leaned against it, shaking his head.

“Little Kenny.  My, my, you’re a bit out of your depth now, aren’t you?  This thing you had for Lizzie now gets you the mother of all lessons in when to mind your own business.”

Let the man talk.  Talk is cheap.  Talk gives confidence, because he’s trying to build a wall, one that he thinks will protect him and make him stronger.

A hush came over the whole building.  The deputies were coming.  This confrontation wasn’t going to last more than a few minutes.

“I see you’ve got your girlfriends with you.”

He was taunting Alex and Will.  They were not going to be taunted, not after putting down four of his thugs. He’d missed that sideshow.

Sam still had the bottle in his hand.  I knew what he was going to do with it.  He had a hunting knife on him, but that would be too clean.  A jagged-edged bottle that could do some damage.

“Let’s take this outside.”

Better that way.  He wouldn’t get banned, and he could shift the blame to me for starting it.

“You can leave any time you like, Sam.  I have a Bud to finish before I go.”

Another shake of the head, then he smashed the top of the empty bottle in his hand, exposing a jagged edge that would leave a nasty cut.

Eyes darting left and right, he launched himself at me with the bottle, heading straight for my neck.  Three seconds, a swift dodge to the left, and a foot perfectly placed where they glued his leg back together.

Everyone heard it crack, everyone heard the scream, and then everyone heard the bull elephant hit the floor and go very still.

Then the sheriff and two deputies burst through the crowd.  No one had said a word.  Nothing.  His friends didn’t move.  Alex had one, Will had the other, and they let them go just as the deputies entered the bull ring.

The two deputies went over to Sam.  The sheriff looked around the crowd, a sea of stunned faces.

“What happened here?”

Thirty seconds before you’ve called out, “Sam was about to throw a bottle at the waitress.”

Another, “He does it all the time.  Hurts them, they all laugh like it’s nothing.”

Another, ” His friends are just as bad.”   Suddenly, the crowd thrust them forward as they tried to blend in.  Alex and Will had disappeared.

“Again, what happened?”  He was sensing a shift in mood.

“That fella told him not to throw the bottle.”

Fingers pointed at me.  I was standing back from but alongside Sam, who still hadn’t moved.  The two deputies were struggling to turn him over.  One was calling for an ambulance.

The sheriff and I knew each other.  I had to bail my brothers out of jail a few times.  I told him ai was the quiet one.  Perhaps that might change very soon.

Behind me, I felt a hand slip into mine and a gentle squeeze.  Then, as quickly as it had happened, it was gone.

“Ken, isn’t it?”

“Sheriff.”

“You told Sam not to throw the bottle?”

“At the waitress, yeah.  Apparently, he’s done it before.  Also physically assaults them, sir.”

“You seem to have done it?”

“I saw the end result of his ministrations, sir.  I know his reputation, sir.  I’ve seen him doing it at school.  Under-age girls.  His parents but them off.”

“Hearsay, Ken.”

A girl’s voice yelled out.  It’s the truth, Sheriff.  It’s you gutless bastards that enabled him.”

The sheriff tried to see who it was, but the crowd closed ranks.

Another deputy came, a bigger man, and together the three rolled him over.  The jagged bottle was sticking out of his upper leg, a bloody mess.

One deputy vomited.  Another pulled off his belt and made a tourniquet.  The other was screaming at dispatch to get an ambulance.

The sheriff looked at me.  “You do this?”

A voice yelled out, “But he did not.”

A ripple of agreement went through the crowd.

He picked one.  “What happened?”

“Sam was leaning against the table.  They were talking.  Then, suddenly, he launched himself at Ken.  Then that same instant, his leg gave out, the gummy one he wrecked being drunk and stupid.  Like tonight.  Went down like the sack shit he is and stabbed himself.  Had he not, Ken would be dead.”

“Anyone else?”

“Smashed the bottle himself, same one he was going to chuck at the girl.  Poetic justice, it’s called.”

The sheriff couldn’t quite put the pieces together to make a believable story.

His eyes stopped on one of the thugs.  “What’s your version?”

“It’s the only version.  His leg gave out, and he stabbed himself.  Fucking fool.”

“You sign a statement to that effect?”

“Everyone will.  He’s terrorised this place, this town, for long enough.”

The sheriff sighed.  “Everyone, go sit down. This is going to be a long night.”

Just then, the ambulance arrived, and the crowd opened up to let the paramedics through.  “Don’t you five go anywhere.”  He pointed at me, the two thugs, Lizzie and the first witness.  He assigned a deputy to watch us after we were taken to a corner with several lounges.

Liz sat next to me.

“Thank you.  You didn’t have to.”

“You should be able to work here and not be afraid. I did what any decent person would.”

“That’s your first mistake.  There ain’t no decent people.  Except maybe you?”

“We’re all tarred with the same brush.  You told mr that.”

“I said a lot of shit back then, cause I didn’t know any better.  You’re not like them.”

“Not if you take in what happened here.”

“That’s different.”

“More violence doesn’t stop violence.  It just makes matters worse.”

“Or better.  You’ll see.”

Sam dies in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. 

The sheriff received 345 witness statements that all said the same thing.  Sam was attacking me, unprovoked, his leg gave out, and he killed himself.  The medical examiner called it death by misadventure. 

No one was to blame.

Except his father and brothers turned up at the family ranch, accusing me of killing Sam, at which my father and brothers fell over laughing so hard.

When they refused to leave, my father got his shotgun, called them trespassers and shot at them. A rather expensive car was severely damaged during the process.

The sheriff was told that when Sam’s father came to him with sworn statements that I was the murderer, he tore them up and said if he wanted to press charges, Sam would be posthumously charged with 15 counts of rape and over a thousand charges of sexual assault, grievous bodily harm, attempted murder, kidnapping, and bribery.

He brought out three boxes of sworn statements and said he was ready to start proceedings today.  All he had to do was give the word, and the press packages would be sent out.

It was no surprise that the father left and never came back.  The two brothers, who thought they would take matters into their own hands, disappeared.

They simply disappeared.

As for Elizabeth, who liked to be called Eliza, let the storm blow through like a prairie wind and one morning turned up at my cabin, at the foot of the hills, in one of the most peaceful places in the county.

She looked radiant.

It had taken a lot to get over the trauma involving Sam.  She was one of those he raped.  It had led to a pregnancy, and after nine months, the baby was stillborn.  It almost killed her, but my mother and her First Nation instincts took her to a healing place and brought her back from what could only be called a very dark place.

She held out her hand, and I took it. Then she said the four words I had been waiting for, “I have come home.”

It was something else I never knew or understood, not until the night I stepped between Sam and Elizabeth.

Our heritage, the ways of my mother’s people, going back into the depths of time, and our affinity with the land and the animals and the spirits.

Things could have turned out very badly that night.

They did not, and for that I would be forever thankful, living in, and surrounded by a world I never knew existed.

©  Charles Heath  2026

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 66/67

Days 66 and 67 – Writing exercise

Take a moment in your past, and turn yourself into a character and express your feelings about it

Some things happen that happen for a reason, even though at the time we do not understand the why, only that the result was not what we expected.

Sometimes that is a negative, and causes pause for thought the next time it happens.  Or it is a positive and sends us in a direction that is borne out of experience.

I am by nature an introvert, the sort of person who keeps to himself.  I learned the hard way to mind my own business and not interfere.  The physical scars had healed, but the mental scars are much harder to recover from.

School taught me that trust is not given freely and that it has to be earned.  Of course, the hurdles to get there are often almost insurmountable, but in the end, you learn one of life’s very valuable lessons.

When I graduated from school, not exactly at the top of the class, not the bottom, but it was enough for me to realise I was not suitable material for college or university.  That being the csse my choices were limited.

Stay on the farm and work alongside my father and some of my brothers and sisters, find a job in town, like a storeman at the hardware; or a general hand in one of the fast food outlets. 

Then there was the factory, where eventually all of us, without any schooling, ended up. It was tedious and back-breaking work, but no one questioned your past, your education, or your work ethic.

It was like the army.  You just slotted in and did your bit and didn’t let anyone down.  It suited me, I didn’t have to mix, and I was left alone, even by those who were from school and definitely not my friends.

That took care of the days.

Then there was Friday night at the bar, a rowdy place with everyone having what might be called a good time for some, and for others, a little sport. 

It could get rough; some of those who drank too much became violent, but mostly you were happy, had dinner, a few drinks, shot pool, talked about everything and nothing and then went home.

At first, I avoided it.  I had been drunk before, but that was at home, the typical I’m going to try everything once, and it wasn’t a good experience.  Seeing others so, without inhibitions or quick to temper, your night could very easily end up in the emergency ward at the hospital.

I’d been there a few times when my brothers got on the wrong end of the argument.  That and a night in the sheriff’s cells for drunk and disorderly.  Once was enough, if you learned the lesson.  Quite a few didn’t.

So, having avoided it long enough, I agreed to go with a couple of other chaps with a similar reluctance.  We had been the guys the football jocks beat up on because they could.

Of course, in the year after leaving school and working at home until I couldn’t take my father or eldest brother riding me, I learned how to defend myself.  It was something I should have done at school, but couldn’t.  I needed money, and no one at home would pay. 

Going to work elsewhere, I quickly discovered, gave me independence and the ability to begin living my own life, mistakes and all.

Joe’s Bar and Grill was in a huge barn at the edge of town on the main road out.  It had been there as long as anyone could remember, as far back as the days when the railway arrived, and the ranchers could send their cattle on.

One of those places where the country met the rail head, cattle going out and people coming in.  For a while, it drove the town into a city.

The cowboys would stay until the money ran out, and then everything went back to normal.  In between times, the townsfolk, what was left of them, spent Friday night, the traditional end of the working week, letting their hair down, and Saturdays, where families celebrated together in a more convivial atmosphere.

Friday night was where it all happened.  The night wore on, and the drinks were flowing, which started off noisy and sometimes turned ugly.  It’s why the deputies were on hand to make sure it didn’t get out of hand. That was the theory.

Alex, Will and I, with a name like Ken, the three musketeers, had all landed jobs at the factory.  We didn’t work together, but we all met up at breaks.  We kept out of everyone’s line of sight and did our jobs.

It was Alex’s idea that we go.  Have a few drinks, see who was there and who wasn’t, and if truth be known, Alex was looking for Lola.

That last year of school, he had a thing for her, but she was more interested in the athletic types, and I could have told him he was wasting his time.  But the lovelorn will not accept advice readily, and he came to grief.  When he asked her to be his date at the prom, she just laughed at him.

Will and I knew better than to waste our time.  Of course, we were not immune to those first pangs of romance.  I dabbled, asking oblique questions of what I thought was an exile from the mean girls, Lizzie, but discovered quickly she was unavailable.

Fair enough.  I had the sense to walk away.

I’d since learned that her aspirations for college had run aground her parents’ end of downsizing, and left with the same opportunities as most who found themselves on the unemployment line.

There seemed to be more and more of these days, along with the shuttering of stores on the main street. 

And despite everything that had happened, and the likelihood of what might happen, we arrived, parked the truck, got out and surveyed the scene before us.  Crowded, noisy, and a powder keg waiting to explode.

I counted half a dozen cruisers and ten deputies I could see, hanging back, waiting.

Four pick-ups in a convoy arrived and parked out front.  Spaces reserved for the management and VIPs.

“No show without punch, eh?” Alex muttered.

One might have regarded Sam Blackstone as a VIP, but his father was some big shot back east, and Sam somehow believed her was the prodigal son.

He made the big league, got drunk after his first big game, tripped and fell down the stairs, and now had a permanent limp and nothing to brag about

Other than the big shot father who never came home.

But that didn’t stop him from being the leader of a bunch of entitled guys who basically did what they pleased.

We avoided them.

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” Will said.  “Remember the last time?”

I think we would.  We got our asses handed to us.

“It’s different this time.”  Alex wasn’t going to forgive or forget.  He attended the same self-defence classes that the three of us did.

Will and I were there for self-defence, Alex was there for vengeance.

“I think Will’s right,” I said, hoping to save him from himself, but judging by his posture and expression, reasoning was out.

“You go.  I can do this.”

Will and I looked at each other and shrugged. Alex, on his own, would only get so far.  As the three musketeers, we might just get out alive.

Joe’s Bar and Grill was Sam’s home turf.

Four trucks, one boss and seven mates.  I’d heard about their antics, second-hand from my sister, Will
Eileen, whose best friend was Lizzie, yes, that Lizzie, whose older brother was a deputy.

Well, it is now back to being a small town where everyone knew everyone else.

Last advice, Sam had finally worn out the new Sheriff’s patience. Times had changed, the old sheriff got voted out after a corruption charge was brought against him, not proven, but the local folks figured it was time for a change.

The memo hadn’t reached Sam.  Yet.

Alex started walking towards the front entrance.  I shrugged.  “In for a penny…”

Will just sighed.  “This is going to be fun.”  The way he said it, I knew what he meant.  This was going yo be anything but fun.

Dodger, the nickname we gave to the guy on the door, was from the fact that when the fighting started, he disappeared.

“You guys ain’t been here for a while.”

“Nope,” I said.  “And judging by the noise, nothing’s changed much.”

“We’ve got a bucking bull.”

He was taking us literally.  On Dodger could do that.  The other door guys would have just ignored us.

“I’ll be sure to check it out,” I said.

Past the threshold, it was wall-to-wall people.  Such was Joe’s fame that people came from far and wide.

In front of us, the bar, which stretched from the front to the back, was double-sided.  One side served the pool tables and the bucking bulls, the other tables, and further back, the dance floor.

A gun could go off, and no one would hear it.

“I’ll get a table, you two get drinks and try to stay out of trouble.”  He disappeared into the fog

We went to the bar.  Men served the drinks, the girls delivered them to the tables, and there was also a mix of ‘get your own’, or ‘have it served at your table’, giving the girls a tip.

I heard a rumour that Lizzie and her friends worked as waitresses on Friday and Saturday, the tips adding nicely to their bank accounts, despite the unruly and sometimes bad behaviour of certain customers.

I got the first round, and we went into the fog, and minutes later stumbled into the table where Will was sitting.  A waitress, not Lizzie, came past and slopped a wet rag over the table top and kept going.

We sat.

“Where did Sam go?  I didn’t see him when I was at the bar.”  Will might have seen him on his way to the table.  A shake of the head said no.

“What do you want to know for?”

“So trouble does sneak up on us.”

I was not sure why I was so worried.  We were too small for him to be bothered with.

And by the time an hour had passed, we were approaching the bewitching hour, so named because it was about the time those who had too much and were supposed to be elected by management started to arc up.

The crowd had thinned, but there were still a lot of people there.  The line dancing was getting a little erratic as the booze started to take effect, and already one skirmish had broken out.

The deputies appeared and escorted the guilty to the van and taken to the drunk tank.  It was a sombre warning to others

We had shifted to the bar, and that’s when I saw Lizzie.  She came back and was not far from us.  She looked tired and oddly dishevelled.

And angry.

I slid off my chair and went over.

When she turned, I said, “How are you, Liz?”

I remembered just in time that she hated being called Lizzie.

“How do you think I am?”  It exploded out of her.  Something had happened.

“I know you don’t like me, but that’s a bit strong when a ‘I’m fine, piss off’ spoken politely would have sufficed.”

I turned to go back.

“Sorry.”

I stopped and turned. 

“I’m having a bad night,” she said, sadly, like it was a permanent fact.

“Wouldn’t that be every Friday?”

“No, only those when Sam and his thugs come.  Thinks he owns the place, and that we are at his beck and call.”

“Be worth the tips.”

She snorted.  “Insults, maybe.  Not money.  Not anything.”

“You’re his gopher?”

“And Sally, and Brigitte.  I don’t think there’s a girl under 25 he hasn’t had his way with.  But it’s our own fault for believing the scumbag.”

The barkeep put a tray of drinks on the bar.

“Gotta go.  Ken, isn’t it?  You dodged a bullet, Ken.  I’m not worthy of anything or anyone any more.”

A last look, this one carrying so much despair it nearly brought me to tears.

I had hoped I would miss Sam, but if he was the one who had broken Lizzie, then I was going to make it my mission to break him.

A little more than he already was.

He was down the back, in a booth, flanked by thugs and sitting with three fresh faces, girls who had not experienced the Sam charm offensive.

I watched Lizzie drop the tray on the table, knocking over a bottle, and everyone watching it roll onto his lap.

Silence.  In this corner.

She apologised.  He picked up the bottle and looked like he was going to throw it at her. She flinched in a way I knew this was not the first time, and that was when I said, “You do that, Sam, and it’ll be the last thing you do tonight.”

Three things happened.

First, the two thugs and the two girls got out from behind the table faster than I’d ever seen anyone move, the girls moving away, the thugs positioning themselves so I couldn’t run.

My intention wasn’t to run, but always have an exit just in case.  I picked one.

I motioned for Lizzie to step behind me, and after a moment’s hesitation, she did.  I thought Sam might stop her, but he didn’t.  He had a bigger fish to try.

Second, four of his other thugs came running, but in the crowd, which seemed to close up, it was hard to make headway.  Then Will and Alex appeared, and with two quick and subtle moments, the four were on the floor writhing in agony.

They had simply used their momentum and excess weight, and the degree of intoxication against them.  They took up positions near the two thugs who had been sitting at the table.

Third, the crowd closed in, making it impossible for the deputies to get through.  There was something in the air, and it wasn’t support for Sam.

Not that he would have seen it that way.

Slowly, and very deliberately, he slid out from behind the table and stood.  There was no doubt he was an impressive size, six inches taller and fifty pounds or more.

Enough to scare anyone into submission.

Except he had one weakness.

He came around to the front of the table and leaned against it, shaking his head.

“Little Kenny.  My, my, you’re a bit out of your depth now, aren’t you?  This thing you had for Lizzie now gets you the mother of all lessons in when to mind your own business.”

Let the man talk.  Talk is cheap.  Talk gives confidence, because he’s trying to build a wall, one that he thinks will protect him and make him stronger.

A hush came over the whole building.  The deputies were coming.  This confrontation wasn’t going to last more than a few minutes.

“I see you’ve got your girlfriends with you.”

He was taunting Alex and Will.  They were not going to be taunted, not after putting down four of his thugs. He’d missed that sideshow.

Sam still had the bottle in his hand.  I knew what he was going to do with it.  He had a hunting knife on him, but that would be too clean.  A jagged-edged bottle that could do some damage.

“Let’s take this outside.”

Better that way.  He wouldn’t get banned, and he could shift the blame to me for starting it.

“You can leave any time you like, Sam.  I have a Bud to finish before I go.”

Another shake of the head, then he smashed the top of the empty bottle in his hand, exposing a jagged edge that would leave a nasty cut.

Eyes darting left and right, he launched himself at me with the bottle, heading straight for my neck.  Three seconds, a swift dodge to the left, and a foot perfectly placed where they glued his leg back together.

Everyone heard it crack, everyone heard the scream, and then everyone heard the bull elephant hit the floor and go very still.

Then the sheriff and two deputies burst through the crowd.  No one had said a word.  Nothing.  His friends didn’t move.  Alex had one, Will had the other, and they let them go just as the deputies entered the bull ring.

The two deputies went over to Sam.  The sheriff looked around the crowd, a sea of stunned faces.

“What happened here?”

Thirty seconds before you’ve called out, “Sam was about to throw a bottle at the waitress.”

Another, “He does it all the time.  Hurts them, they all laugh like it’s nothing.”

Another, ” His friends are just as bad.”   Suddenly, the crowd thrust them forward as they tried to blend in.  Alex and Will had disappeared.

“Again, what happened?”  He was sensing a shift in mood.

“That fella told him not to throw the bottle.”

Fingers pointed at me.  I was standing back from but alongside Sam, who still hadn’t moved.  The two deputies were struggling to turn him over.  One was calling for an ambulance.

The sheriff and I knew each other.  I had to bail my brothers out of jail a few times.  I told him ai was the quiet one.  Perhaps that might change very soon.

Behind me, I felt a hand slip into mine and a gentle squeeze.  Then, as quickly as it had happened, it was gone.

“Ken, isn’t it?”

“Sheriff.”

“You told Sam not to throw the bottle?”

“At the waitress, yeah.  Apparently, he’s done it before.  Also physically assaults them, sir.”

“You seem to have done it?”

“I saw the end result of his ministrations, sir.  I know his reputation, sir.  I’ve seen him doing it at school.  Under-age girls.  His parents but them off.”

“Hearsay, Ken.”

A girl’s voice yelled out.  It’s the truth, Sheriff.  It’s you gutless bastards that enabled him.”

The sheriff tried to see who it was, but the crowd closed ranks.

Another deputy came, a bigger man, and together the three rolled him over.  The jagged bottle was sticking out of his upper leg, a bloody mess.

One deputy vomited.  Another pulled off his belt and made a tourniquet.  The other was screaming at dispatch to get an ambulance.

The sheriff looked at me.  “You do this?”

A voice yelled out, “But he did not.”

A ripple of agreement went through the crowd.

He picked one.  “What happened?”

“Sam was leaning against the table.  They were talking.  Then, suddenly, he launched himself at Ken.  Then that same instant, his leg gave out, the gummy one he wrecked being drunk and stupid.  Like tonight.  Went down like the sack shit he is and stabbed himself.  Had he not, Ken would be dead.”

“Anyone else?”

“Smashed the bottle himself, same one he was going to chuck at the girl.  Poetic justice, it’s called.”

The sheriff couldn’t quite put the pieces together to make a believable story.

His eyes stopped on one of the thugs.  “What’s your version?”

“It’s the only version.  His leg gave out, and he stabbed himself.  Fucking fool.”

“You sign a statement to that effect?”

“Everyone will.  He’s terrorised this place, this town, for long enough.”

The sheriff sighed.  “Everyone, go sit down. This is going to be a long night.”

Just then, the ambulance arrived, and the crowd opened up to let the paramedics through.  “Don’t you five go anywhere.”  He pointed at me, the two thugs, Lizzie and the first witness.  He assigned a deputy to watch us after we were taken to a corner with several lounges.

Liz sat next to me.

“Thank you.  You didn’t have to.”

“You should be able to work here and not be afraid. I did what any decent person would.”

“That’s your first mistake.  There ain’t no decent people.  Except maybe you?”

“We’re all tarred with the same brush.  You told mr that.”

“I said a lot of shit back then, cause I didn’t know any better.  You’re not like them.”

“Not if you take in what happened here.”

“That’s different.”

“More violence doesn’t stop violence.  It just makes matters worse.”

“Or better.  You’ll see.”

Sam dies in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. 

The sheriff received 345 witness statements that all said the same thing.  Sam was attacking me, unprovoked, his leg gave out, and he killed himself.  The medical examiner called it death by misadventure. 

No one was to blame.

Except his father and brothers turned up at the family ranch, accusing me of killing Sam, at which my father and brothers fell over laughing so hard.

When they refused to leave, my father got his shotgun, called them trespassers and shot at them. A rather expensive car was severely damaged during the process.

The sheriff was told that when Sam’s father came to him with sworn statements that I was the murderer, he tore them up and said if he wanted to press charges, Sam would be posthumously charged with 15 counts of rape and over a thousand charges of sexual assault, grievous bodily harm, attempted murder, kidnapping, and bribery.

He brought out three boxes of sworn statements and said he was ready to start proceedings today.  All he had to do was give the word, and the press packages would be sent out.

It was no surprise that the father left and never came back.  The two brothers, who thought they would take matters into their own hands, disappeared.

They simply disappeared.

As for Elizabeth, who liked to be called Eliza, let the storm blow through like a prairie wind and one morning turned up at my cabin, at the foot of the hills, in one of the most peaceful places in the county.

She looked radiant.

It had taken a lot to get over the trauma involving Sam.  She was one of those he raped.  It had led to a pregnancy, and after nine months, the baby was stillborn.  It almost killed her, but my mother and her First Nation instincts took her to a healing place and brought her back from what could only be called a very dark place.

She held out her hand, and I took it. Then she said the four words I had been waiting for, “I have come home.”

It was something else I never knew or understood, not until the night I stepped between Sam and Elizabeth.

Our heritage, the ways of my mother’s people, going back into the depths of time, and our affinity with the land and the animals and the spirits.

Things could have turned out very badly that night.

They did not, and for that I would be forever thankful, living in, and surrounded by a world I never knew existed.

©  Charles Heath  2026

365 Days of writing, 2026 – My Second Story 10

More about my second novel

John is in Vienna, Austria.

It’s been quite some years since we were in Vienna, and I remember it was a very pleasant experience. The copious notes and photographs I took have helped me write this chapter.

There is no doubting the zeal Worthington will put into the capture or assassination of Zoe, if and when she is discovered, and John would be horrified if he knew he was being used in such a manner.

At times, it will be a bit like reading an Eric Ambler thriller: going to the hotel, getting information from concierges, and then tracking her movements. Money, as always, speaks one language: pay enough and you will find out what you want to know.

We know Zoe is languishing in a basement somewhere in Bratislava.

John is about to find out where she went, but searching for someone in Bratislava will be completely different from searching for someone in Austria.

The same rules don’t apply in Hungary.

As for our visit, we stayed at the Hilton Vienna Park, though the park was then called something else. It was also when we had our first authentic Vienna Schnitzel and sampled Austrian cherries.

From there, we took the train to Schonbrunn Palace, with its extensive gardens and maze, impressive architecture, old rooms and paintings, and, at the end, so many sets of crockery.

There was also a nearby kitchen that made Apple Strudel, where we watched it being made and then had a slice afterwards.

We also went to a Wiener Palace, which offered a large and varied selection of sausages.

Unfortunately, there were no music recitals or orchestral events during our visit.

365 Days of writing, 2026 – My Second Story 9

More about my second novel

John is in Vienna, Austria.

It’s been quite some years since we were in Vienna, and I remember it was a very pleasant experience. The copious notes and photographs I took have aided in writing this chapter.

There is no doubting the zeal Worthington will put into the capture or assassination of Zoe, if and when she is discovered, and John would be horrified if he knew he was being used in such a manner.

At times, it will be a bit like reading an Eric Ambler thriller: going to the hotel, getting information from concierges, and then tracking her movements. Money, as always, speaks one language: pay enough and you will find out what you want to know.

We know Zoe is languishing in a basement somewhere in Bratislava.

John is about to find out where she went, but searching for someone in Bratislava will be completely different from searching for someone in Austria.

The same rules don’t apply in Hungary.

As for our visit, we stayed at the Hilton Vienna Park, though the park was then called something else. It was also when we had our first authentic Vienna Schnitzel and sampled Austrian cherries.

From there, we took the train to Schonbrunn Palace, with its extensive gardens and maze, impressive architecture, old rooms and paintings, and, at the end, so many sets of crockery.

There was also a nearby kitchen that made Apple Strudel, where we watched it being made and then had a slice afterwards.

We also went to a Wiener Palace, which offered a large and varied selection of sausages.

Unfortunately, there were no music recitals or orchestral events during our visit.

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 65

Day 65 – Don’t wait for inspiration

Don’t Wait for Inspiration – Go Find It (And Write Even When It Doesn’t Show Up)

“Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.” – Pablo Picasso

If you’re a writer, a designer, a marketer, or anyone whose craft lives on ideas, you’ve probably felt the sting of a blank page. The old myth that “inspiration will magically appear” lures us into procrastination, self‑doubt, and endless scrolling. The truth is far more practical—and far more empowering: inspiration is a habit, not a miracle.

In this post, we’ll unpack why waiting for inspiration is a dead‑end strategy, explore concrete ways to hunt down that creative spark, and learn how to write anyway when the muse is stubbornly silent.


1. The Myth of “Waiting for Inspiration”

What the myth saysWhat reality looks like
“I’ll start when I feel inspired.”Inspiration is a by‑product of work, not the other way around.
“I’m waiting for the perfect idea.”Ideas are often crude drafts that become polished through iteration.
“If I’m not excited, I’m not ready.”Excitement follows progress, not precedes it.

Why the myth is dangerous

  1. Paralysis by perfection: The moment you decide to wait, you hand the reins over to an invisible force you can’t control.
  2. Self‑fulfilling prophecy: No work → no inspiration → more “waiting.”
  3. Lost opportunities: The world moves on while you sit on the sidelines, watching deadlines and ideas slip away.

The reality check: The most prolific creators—from novelists to tech innovators—agree on a single habit: they show up first. The act of sitting down, opening a document, or sketching a line is the catalyst that lights the fire.


2. Turning Inspiration Into a Search Mission

If you’re comfortable with the idea that you have to go looking, the next step is to turn that intention into an actionable plan. Below are five proven “inspiration‑hunt” tactics, each with a quick starter exercise you can try today.

A. Change Your Physical Environment

Why it works: Your brain is wired to associate surroundings with mental states. A new view can break the monotony that fuels creative blocks.

Starter exercise:

  • The 10‑Minute Walk: Step outside for ten minutes—no phone, no playlist, just you and the street. Notice three details you’ve never observed before (e.g., the pattern on a fence, the cadence of a neighbour’s footsteps). Jot them down on a sticky note.

B. Consume Outside Your Niche

Why it works: Cross‑pollination of ideas sparks novel connections. A poet reading a physics article may discover a metaphor that reshapes a stanza.

Starter exercise:

  • Random Article Roulette: Open Wikipedia, click “Random article,” and read for five minutes. Highlight any phrase or concept that resonates, then brainstorm how it could relate to your current project.

C. Use Prompt Generators

Why it works: Prompts force your brain to think in a direction you wouldn’t have chosen on your own, breaking the “blank page” inertia.

Starter exercise:

  • Visit a prompt site (e.g., r/WritingPrompts, The Story Shack) and copy the first prompt you see. Write a 300‑word piece—don’t edit, just let the words flow.

D. Engage in “Creative Cross‑Training”

Why it works: Physical activity releases dopamine and boosts divergent thinking, while creative activities like doodling or mind‑mapping prime the brain for ideation.

Starter exercise:

  • 15‑Minute Stretch + Sketch: Do a quick stretch routine (or a short yoga flow). While your muscles relax, sketch anything that comes to mind—no rules, just shapes.

E. Set a “Bad‑Idea” Deadline

Why it works: Removing the pressure of perfection opens the floodgates. Bad ideas are just raw material; they can be refined or discarded later.

Starter exercise:

  • Set a timer for 8 minutes. Write the worst possible opening line for your piece. After the timer, read it aloud. How many elements can you salvage? Often the most surprising gems hide in the trash.

3. When Inspiration Still Plays Hard‑to‑Get: Write Anyway

You’ve tried the tactics, taken a walk, read a random article, and still hear crickets. This is the perfect moment to embrace the “write anyway” mindset. Below are strategies to turn a dry spell into productive output.

1. Free‑Writing (aka “Morning Pages”)

  • How it works: Set a timer for 10–20 minutes. Write whatever comes to mind—no editing, no judgment. Even if the only thing you write is “I don’t know what to write,” keep typing. The act of movement on the page often unblocks deeper thoughts.
  • Why it helps: It removes the mental barrier of “I have to be good.” By the end of the session, your brain is warmed up and ready for more focused work.

2. The “One‑Sentence” Rule

  • How it works: Tell yourself you only need to write a single sentence. It could be a description, a dialogue line, or a statement of intent. Once that sentence is down, you’re more likely to continue.
  • Why it helps: Small wins create momentum. The brain often resists a large task but is fine with a tiny one.

3. Reverse Outlining

  • How it works: Take an existing piece of your own writing (even a paragraph from a past blog) and outline its structure. Then, using that outline, write a brand‑new piece on a different topic.
  • Why it helps: You’re reusing a proven skeleton, which reduces the cognitive load of figuring out how to start.

4. Turn Constraints into Catalysts

  • How it works: Impose an artificial limitation: write a story without the letter “e,” or draft a blog post in exactly 150 words.
  • Why it helps: Constraints force you to think laterally, often sparking surprising ideas that would never surface in a free‑form environment.

5. Talk It Out—Verbally, Not Textually

  • How it works: Record yourself talking about your topic for five minutes, as if you were explaining it to a friend. Then transcribe the audio (or just listen back) and pull out usable sentences.
  • Why it helps: Speaking loosens the inner critic; you’re less likely to self‑edit in real time. The resulting transcript can become raw material for polished prose.

4. The Science Behind “Doing the Work”

Psychological PrincipleHow it Relates to Writing
The Zeigarnik Effect – unfinished tasks stay on our mindStarting a sentence, even a terrible one, creates a mental “open loop” that pushes us to finish it.
Flow State – deep focus occurs when challenge meets skillBy setting low‑stakes prompts (e.g., 5‑minute free‑write), you hit the sweet spot of challenge, making flow easier to achieve.
Neuroplasticity – the brain builds new pathways through repeated activityConsistently showing up to write rewires your brain to treat writing as a habit, not a rare event.

Understanding that the brain rewards action, not anticipation, flips the script: you’re not waiting for inspiration; you’re creating it through deliberate practice.


5. A Real‑World Example: From “Stuck” to Published

Case Study: Maya, freelance copywriter
Maya hit a wall on a landing‑page project for a wellness startup. She’d stared at the brief for three days, hoping a “big idea” would suddenly appear. Instead, she tried the steps above:

  1. Walked around her neighborhood, noting the colors of sunrise.
  2. Read a short article on the science of habit formation.
  3. Set a 5‑minute timer and wrote the worst possible headline (“Feel Amazing Today—Or Don’t”).
  4. She then turned that bad headline into a list of 10 alternatives, choosing the one that resonated most.
  5. Finally, she drafted the page in 30‑minute bursts, ignoring perfection.
    Result? The client loved the final copy, and Maya delivered the project ahead of schedule. She credits the “write anyway” phase for breaking the mental block that was costing her both time and confidence.

Maya’s story illustrates a simple truth: the more you move, the more ideas surface. You don’t need a mystical muse; you need momentum.


6. Quick‑Start Checklist: “Inspiration on Demand”

✔️ActionTime Needed
1Take a 10‑minute walk and note three new observations.10 min
2Read a random article from a field outside yours.5 min
3Write a 300‑word piece using a prompt.15 min
4Do a 5‑minute free‑write (any topic).5 min
5Choose the worst sentence you can think of; improve it.3 min
6Review and select one idea to develop further.5 min

Total: ~43 minutes.
If you can’t spare that much, pick any two items and repeat daily. Consistency beats intensity.


7. Take the First Step Right Now

Your challenge: Pick one of the tactics above, set a timer for 8 minutes, and start writing. Don’t worry about the outcome. When the timer dings, read what you’ve produced. Notice the shift in your mental state—often you’ll feel a spark that wasn’t there before you began.


Closing Thoughts

Waiting for inspiration is like waiting for a bus that may never arrive. By going looking—whether that means walking, reading, prompting, or simply forcing yourself to write—you become the driver of your own creative journey. And when the bus does finally pull up, you’ll be ready with a ticket, a seat, and the confidence to hop aboard.

Remember:

  • Show up first. The act of writing is the catalyst.
  • Seek stimuli actively. Your environment, consumption habits, and prompts are tools, not distractions.
  • Write anyway. Bad ideas, half‑baked sentences, and free‑writes are the raw ore from which gold is refined.

So, next time you stare at a blank screen and hear the internal mantra, “I’ll wait for inspiration,” flip it: “I’m going to find it—and I’ll write, no matter what.”

Your next masterpiece is waiting on the other side of that first typed word.

Happy hunting, and happy writing! 🚀

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 65

Day 65 – Don’t wait for inspiration

Don’t Wait for Inspiration – Go Find It (And Write Even When It Doesn’t Show Up)

“Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.” – Pablo Picasso

If you’re a writer, a designer, a marketer, or anyone whose craft lives on ideas, you’ve probably felt the sting of a blank page. The old myth that “inspiration will magically appear” lures us into procrastination, self‑doubt, and endless scrolling. The truth is far more practical—and far more empowering: inspiration is a habit, not a miracle.

In this post, we’ll unpack why waiting for inspiration is a dead‑end strategy, explore concrete ways to hunt down that creative spark, and learn how to write anyway when the muse is stubbornly silent.


1. The Myth of “Waiting for Inspiration”

What the myth saysWhat reality looks like
“I’ll start when I feel inspired.”Inspiration is a by‑product of work, not the other way around.
“I’m waiting for the perfect idea.”Ideas are often crude drafts that become polished through iteration.
“If I’m not excited, I’m not ready.”Excitement follows progress, not precedes it.

Why the myth is dangerous

  1. Paralysis by perfection: The moment you decide to wait, you hand the reins over to an invisible force you can’t control.
  2. Self‑fulfilling prophecy: No work → no inspiration → more “waiting.”
  3. Lost opportunities: The world moves on while you sit on the sidelines, watching deadlines and ideas slip away.

The reality check: The most prolific creators—from novelists to tech innovators—agree on a single habit: they show up first. The act of sitting down, opening a document, or sketching a line is the catalyst that lights the fire.


2. Turning Inspiration Into a Search Mission

If you’re comfortable with the idea that you have to go looking, the next step is to turn that intention into an actionable plan. Below are five proven “inspiration‑hunt” tactics, each with a quick starter exercise you can try today.

A. Change Your Physical Environment

Why it works: Your brain is wired to associate surroundings with mental states. A new view can break the monotony that fuels creative blocks.

Starter exercise:

  • The 10‑Minute Walk: Step outside for ten minutes—no phone, no playlist, just you and the street. Notice three details you’ve never observed before (e.g., the pattern on a fence, the cadence of a neighbour’s footsteps). Jot them down on a sticky note.

B. Consume Outside Your Niche

Why it works: Cross‑pollination of ideas sparks novel connections. A poet reading a physics article may discover a metaphor that reshapes a stanza.

Starter exercise:

  • Random Article Roulette: Open Wikipedia, click “Random article,” and read for five minutes. Highlight any phrase or concept that resonates, then brainstorm how it could relate to your current project.

C. Use Prompt Generators

Why it works: Prompts force your brain to think in a direction you wouldn’t have chosen on your own, breaking the “blank page” inertia.

Starter exercise:

  • Visit a prompt site (e.g., r/WritingPrompts, The Story Shack) and copy the first prompt you see. Write a 300‑word piece—don’t edit, just let the words flow.

D. Engage in “Creative Cross‑Training”

Why it works: Physical activity releases dopamine and boosts divergent thinking, while creative activities like doodling or mind‑mapping prime the brain for ideation.

Starter exercise:

  • 15‑Minute Stretch + Sketch: Do a quick stretch routine (or a short yoga flow). While your muscles relax, sketch anything that comes to mind—no rules, just shapes.

E. Set a “Bad‑Idea” Deadline

Why it works: Removing the pressure of perfection opens the floodgates. Bad ideas are just raw material; they can be refined or discarded later.

Starter exercise:

  • Set a timer for 8 minutes. Write the worst possible opening line for your piece. After the timer, read it aloud. How many elements can you salvage? Often the most surprising gems hide in the trash.

3. When Inspiration Still Plays Hard‑to‑Get: Write Anyway

You’ve tried the tactics, taken a walk, read a random article, and still hear crickets. This is the perfect moment to embrace the “write anyway” mindset. Below are strategies to turn a dry spell into productive output.

1. Free‑Writing (aka “Morning Pages”)

  • How it works: Set a timer for 10–20 minutes. Write whatever comes to mind—no editing, no judgment. Even if the only thing you write is “I don’t know what to write,” keep typing. The act of movement on the page often unblocks deeper thoughts.
  • Why it helps: It removes the mental barrier of “I have to be good.” By the end of the session, your brain is warmed up and ready for more focused work.

2. The “One‑Sentence” Rule

  • How it works: Tell yourself you only need to write a single sentence. It could be a description, a dialogue line, or a statement of intent. Once that sentence is down, you’re more likely to continue.
  • Why it helps: Small wins create momentum. The brain often resists a large task but is fine with a tiny one.

3. Reverse Outlining

  • How it works: Take an existing piece of your own writing (even a paragraph from a past blog) and outline its structure. Then, using that outline, write a brand‑new piece on a different topic.
  • Why it helps: You’re reusing a proven skeleton, which reduces the cognitive load of figuring out how to start.

4. Turn Constraints into Catalysts

  • How it works: Impose an artificial limitation: write a story without the letter “e,” or draft a blog post in exactly 150 words.
  • Why it helps: Constraints force you to think laterally, often sparking surprising ideas that would never surface in a free‑form environment.

5. Talk It Out—Verbally, Not Textually

  • How it works: Record yourself talking about your topic for five minutes, as if you were explaining it to a friend. Then transcribe the audio (or just listen back) and pull out usable sentences.
  • Why it helps: Speaking loosens the inner critic; you’re less likely to self‑edit in real time. The resulting transcript can become raw material for polished prose.

4. The Science Behind “Doing the Work”

Psychological PrincipleHow it Relates to Writing
The Zeigarnik Effect – unfinished tasks stay on our mindStarting a sentence, even a terrible one, creates a mental “open loop” that pushes us to finish it.
Flow State – deep focus occurs when challenge meets skillBy setting low‑stakes prompts (e.g., 5‑minute free‑write), you hit the sweet spot of challenge, making flow easier to achieve.
Neuroplasticity – the brain builds new pathways through repeated activityConsistently showing up to write rewires your brain to treat writing as a habit, not a rare event.

Understanding that the brain rewards action, not anticipation, flips the script: you’re not waiting for inspiration; you’re creating it through deliberate practice.


5. A Real‑World Example: From “Stuck” to Published

Case Study: Maya, freelance copywriter
Maya hit a wall on a landing‑page project for a wellness startup. She’d stared at the brief for three days, hoping a “big idea” would suddenly appear. Instead, she tried the steps above:

  1. Walked around her neighborhood, noting the colors of sunrise.
  2. Read a short article on the science of habit formation.
  3. Set a 5‑minute timer and wrote the worst possible headline (“Feel Amazing Today—Or Don’t”).
  4. She then turned that bad headline into a list of 10 alternatives, choosing the one that resonated most.
  5. Finally, she drafted the page in 30‑minute bursts, ignoring perfection.
    Result? The client loved the final copy, and Maya delivered the project ahead of schedule. She credits the “write anyway” phase for breaking the mental block that was costing her both time and confidence.

Maya’s story illustrates a simple truth: the more you move, the more ideas surface. You don’t need a mystical muse; you need momentum.


6. Quick‑Start Checklist: “Inspiration on Demand”

✔️ActionTime Needed
1Take a 10‑minute walk and note three new observations.10 min
2Read a random article from a field outside yours.5 min
3Write a 300‑word piece using a prompt.15 min
4Do a 5‑minute free‑write (any topic).5 min
5Choose the worst sentence you can think of; improve it.3 min
6Review and select one idea to develop further.5 min

Total: ~43 minutes.
If you can’t spare that much, pick any two items and repeat daily. Consistency beats intensity.


7. Take the First Step Right Now

Your challenge: Pick one of the tactics above, set a timer for 8 minutes, and start writing. Don’t worry about the outcome. When the timer dings, read what you’ve produced. Notice the shift in your mental state—often you’ll feel a spark that wasn’t there before you began.


Closing Thoughts

Waiting for inspiration is like waiting for a bus that may never arrive. By going looking—whether that means walking, reading, prompting, or simply forcing yourself to write—you become the driver of your own creative journey. And when the bus does finally pull up, you’ll be ready with a ticket, a seat, and the confidence to hop aboard.

Remember:

  • Show up first. The act of writing is the catalyst.
  • Seek stimuli actively. Your environment, consumption habits, and prompts are tools, not distractions.
  • Write anyway. Bad ideas, half‑baked sentences, and free‑writes are the raw ore from which gold is refined.

So, next time you stare at a blank screen and hear the internal mantra, “I’ll wait for inspiration,” flip it: “I’m going to find it—and I’ll write, no matter what.”

Your next masterpiece is waiting on the other side of that first typed word.

Happy hunting, and happy writing! 🚀

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 64

Day 64 – Pick a side

Speak Yourself Your Own Way – In Other Words, Pick a Side

“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.”
— Coco Chanel

In a world that rewards smoothness, consensus, and “politically correct” chatter, it can feel dangerously easy to slip into the comfortable grey zone of “neutrality.” We skim the headlines, like‑share the most palatable meme, and keep our opinions tucked away in the safety of the private inbox. Yet the very act of living—of showing up in the world—requires us to speak ourselves our own way. In practice, that means picking a side and letting that choice shape the language, the tone, and the conviction behind our words.

Below is a roadmap for anyone who’s ever felt the tug‑of‑war between wanting to belong and yearning to be heard. It’s a call to step out of the echo chamber, sharpen your voice, and own the space you occupy—both online and offline.


1. Why “Neutral” Is Actually a Position

Neutrality isn’t a blank page; it’s a faint watermark.

When you decide not to take a stance, you implicitly endorse the status quo. If you stay silent on climate change, you’re indirectly supporting the systems that keep emissions high. If you never voice your discomfort with workplace micro‑aggressions, you let the culture that tolerates them persist.

The hidden cost:

  • Moral fatigue – you expend mental energy worrying about offending, which erodes authenticity.
  • Lost influence – decision‑makers notice those who speak up; the quiet ones fade into the background statistics.
  • Identity drift – without a declared side, your personal brand becomes a vague, undifferentiated blur.

Understanding that “neutral” is a covert side helps the first step: recognising the need to speak for yourself, your own way.


2. Discover Your Core Compass

Before you can speak confidently, you need a compass—a set of values that feels as unshakeable as a lighthouse in a storm.

ExerciseWhat It Looks LikeOutcome
Values InventoryWrite down 12–15 values (e.g., justice, curiosity, humor). Highlight the top 5 that feel non‑negotiable.A distilled list that guides every decision.
Story MiningRecall moments when you felt most alive, proud, or outraged. What values were in play?Patterns that reveal hidden convictions.
Future LetterImagine yourself 10 years from now, looking back. What would you be proud to have stood for?A forward‑looking “mission statement.”

When you can articulate why you care, you’ll know what side you’re picking.


3. The Anatomy of an Authentic Voice

A voice isn’t just what you say; it’s how you say it. Below are the elements that, once calibrated, make your speech unmistakably yours.

ComponentGuidelineExamples
ToneMatch the emotion of your message. Empathy for personal stories, urgency for calls to action.“I feel deeply about this” vs. “We must act now.”
VocabularyChoose words that are true to your background—no need for pretentious jargon.A tech‑entrepreneur might say “scalable,” while a teacher says “student‑centered.”
PacingVary sentence length to keep listeners engaged. Short bursts for impact, longer sentences for nuance.“Enough.” (pause) “We need change.”
StorytellingAnchor abstract ideas in concrete anecdotes.“When I first saw the polluted river, I thought….”
ConsistencyReinforce your side across platforms—social media, meetings, email signatures.A sustainability advocate consistently shares zero‑waste tips.

Practice these elements in low‑stakes situations (Twitter threads, group chats) before moving to higher‑visibility arenas.


4. Picking a Side Without Burning Bridges

You might wonder, “Will I alienate friends, colleagues, or customers?” The answer is yes—but not necessarily in a bad way. When you clearly declare a side, you attract people who align with you and filter out those who don’t. That’s the secret to building a community that actually supports your mission.

Tips for a graceful side‑pick:

  1. Start with “I.” Frame statements as personal convictions rather than universal mandates.
    “I believe we need a living wage” sounds less confrontational than “Everyone must agree we need a living wage.”
  2. Invite Dialogue, Not Debate.
    Offer a why and ask what others think.
    “I’m curious—how do you see the impact of remote work on work‑life balance?”
  3. Show Humility. Acknowledge you’re still learning; be open to data that refutes your stance.
    “I’m still reading up on this, but here’s why I’m leaning toward X.”
  4. Find Common Ground. Even on polarised topics, there’s usually a shared value (e.g., safety, fairness). Anchor your side there.
    “Both of us want safer streets; I think redesigning traffic flow is the most effective route.”
  5. Set Boundaries. If a conversation turns toxic, politely disengage. Your reputation benefits more from consistency than from endless argument.

5. Real‑World Examples: When Speaking Your Own Way Made a Difference

PersonSide PickedImpact
Greta ThunbergClimate crisis urgencyBecame a global catalyst for youth climate activism; policy discussions shifted.
Malala YousafzaiGirls’ right to educationInternational legislation and funding for girls’ schools surged.
Simon SinekLeadership rooted in “Why”Companies adopted purpose‑first strategies, boosting employee engagement.
Megan RapinoeGender equality & LGBTQ+ rights in sportAccelerated NFL and FIFA policy reviews on equality.
John Green (author)Mental‑health openness in YA literatureDestigmatized depression among teens; inspired school counseling programs.

These figures didn’t shy away from controversy. They picked a side early, refined their message, and let authenticity drive their influence.


6. Action Plan: 7 Steps to Speak Yourself Your Own Way Today

  1. Write a One‑Sentence Declaration – “I stand for ___ because ___.” Keep it visible (phone lock screen, notebook cover).
  2. Pick One Platform – Twitter, Instagram Stories, a team Slack channel—choose where you’ll post your first statement.
  3. Craft a Mini‑Story – Share a personal anecdote that illustrates why that side matters to you.
  4. Invite Feedback – End with a genuine question that prompts others to share their view.
  5. Schedule Follow‑Up – Set a reminder to revisit the conversation in a week; iterate based on responses.
  6. Audit Your Presence – Look at past posts; remove or revise anything that contradicts your declared side.
  7. Celebrate Small Wins – Did a colleague thank you for your perspective? Did you feel lighter after posting? Acknowledge it.

7. Overcoming the Fear of “Being Labelled”

The biggest mental block is the fear that once you pick a side, you’ll be pigeonholed forever. Remember:

  • Labels are tools, not prisons. “Activist” can open doors to collaborations you’d otherwise miss.
  • Your side can evolve. As new information arrives, you can pivot—just be transparent about the change.
  • People respect consistency more than conformity. A brand that constantly flips its stance loses trust faster than one that stands firm, even when unpopular.

Closing Thought

“Speak yourself your own way” isn’t a call for loudness; it’s a summons for honesty. It’s the invitation to pick a side, not because the world demands it, but because your inner compass demands it. When you do, you carve out a space where others can find you, understand you, and, most importantly, choose to walk alongside you.

So, what side will you claim today? Write it, shout it, tweet it, discuss it over coffee—just make sure it’s yours, unmistakably and unapologetically.

Your voice is the most valuable currency you have. Spend it wisely.


Ready to take the first step? Drop a comment below with your one‑sentence declaration. Let’s start a dialogue that proves speaking for yourself, your own way, really does change the conversation.

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 64

Day 64 – Pick a side

Speak Yourself Your Own Way – In Other Words, Pick a Side

“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.”
— Coco Chanel

In a world that rewards smoothness, consensus, and “politically correct” chatter, it can feel dangerously easy to slip into the comfortable grey zone of “neutrality.” We skim the headlines, like‑share the most palatable meme, and keep our opinions tucked away in the safety of the private inbox. Yet the very act of living—of showing up in the world—requires us to speak ourselves our own way. In practice, that means picking a side and letting that choice shape the language, the tone, and the conviction behind our words.

Below is a roadmap for anyone who’s ever felt the tug‑of‑war between wanting to belong and yearning to be heard. It’s a call to step out of the echo chamber, sharpen your voice, and own the space you occupy—both online and offline.


1. Why “Neutral” Is Actually a Position

Neutrality isn’t a blank page; it’s a faint watermark.

When you decide not to take a stance, you implicitly endorse the status quo. If you stay silent on climate change, you’re indirectly supporting the systems that keep emissions high. If you never voice your discomfort with workplace micro‑aggressions, you let the culture that tolerates them persist.

The hidden cost:

  • Moral fatigue – you expend mental energy worrying about offending, which erodes authenticity.
  • Lost influence – decision‑makers notice those who speak up; the quiet ones fade into the background statistics.
  • Identity drift – without a declared side, your personal brand becomes a vague, undifferentiated blur.

Understanding that “neutral” is a covert side helps the first step: recognising the need to speak for yourself, your own way.


2. Discover Your Core Compass

Before you can speak confidently, you need a compass—a set of values that feels as unshakeable as a lighthouse in a storm.

ExerciseWhat It Looks LikeOutcome
Values InventoryWrite down 12–15 values (e.g., justice, curiosity, humor). Highlight the top 5 that feel non‑negotiable.A distilled list that guides every decision.
Story MiningRecall moments when you felt most alive, proud, or outraged. What values were in play?Patterns that reveal hidden convictions.
Future LetterImagine yourself 10 years from now, looking back. What would you be proud to have stood for?A forward‑looking “mission statement.”

When you can articulate why you care, you’ll know what side you’re picking.


3. The Anatomy of an Authentic Voice

A voice isn’t just what you say; it’s how you say it. Below are the elements that, once calibrated, make your speech unmistakably yours.

ComponentGuidelineExamples
ToneMatch the emotion of your message. Empathy for personal stories, urgency for calls to action.“I feel deeply about this” vs. “We must act now.”
VocabularyChoose words that are true to your background—no need for pretentious jargon.A tech‑entrepreneur might say “scalable,” while a teacher says “student‑centered.”
PacingVary sentence length to keep listeners engaged. Short bursts for impact, longer sentences for nuance.“Enough.” (pause) “We need change.”
StorytellingAnchor abstract ideas in concrete anecdotes.“When I first saw the polluted river, I thought….”
ConsistencyReinforce your side across platforms—social media, meetings, email signatures.A sustainability advocate consistently shares zero‑waste tips.

Practice these elements in low‑stakes situations (Twitter threads, group chats) before moving to higher‑visibility arenas.


4. Picking a Side Without Burning Bridges

You might wonder, “Will I alienate friends, colleagues, or customers?” The answer is yes—but not necessarily in a bad way. When you clearly declare a side, you attract people who align with you and filter out those who don’t. That’s the secret to building a community that actually supports your mission.

Tips for a graceful side‑pick:

  1. Start with “I.” Frame statements as personal convictions rather than universal mandates.
    “I believe we need a living wage” sounds less confrontational than “Everyone must agree we need a living wage.”
  2. Invite Dialogue, Not Debate.
    Offer a why and ask what others think.
    “I’m curious—how do you see the impact of remote work on work‑life balance?”
  3. Show Humility. Acknowledge you’re still learning; be open to data that refutes your stance.
    “I’m still reading up on this, but here’s why I’m leaning toward X.”
  4. Find Common Ground. Even on polarised topics, there’s usually a shared value (e.g., safety, fairness). Anchor your side there.
    “Both of us want safer streets; I think redesigning traffic flow is the most effective route.”
  5. Set Boundaries. If a conversation turns toxic, politely disengage. Your reputation benefits more from consistency than from endless argument.

5. Real‑World Examples: When Speaking Your Own Way Made a Difference

PersonSide PickedImpact
Greta ThunbergClimate crisis urgencyBecame a global catalyst for youth climate activism; policy discussions shifted.
Malala YousafzaiGirls’ right to educationInternational legislation and funding for girls’ schools surged.
Simon SinekLeadership rooted in “Why”Companies adopted purpose‑first strategies, boosting employee engagement.
Megan RapinoeGender equality & LGBTQ+ rights in sportAccelerated NFL and FIFA policy reviews on equality.
John Green (author)Mental‑health openness in YA literatureDestigmatized depression among teens; inspired school counseling programs.

These figures didn’t shy away from controversy. They picked a side early, refined their message, and let authenticity drive their influence.


6. Action Plan: 7 Steps to Speak Yourself Your Own Way Today

  1. Write a One‑Sentence Declaration – “I stand for ___ because ___.” Keep it visible (phone lock screen, notebook cover).
  2. Pick One Platform – Twitter, Instagram Stories, a team Slack channel—choose where you’ll post your first statement.
  3. Craft a Mini‑Story – Share a personal anecdote that illustrates why that side matters to you.
  4. Invite Feedback – End with a genuine question that prompts others to share their view.
  5. Schedule Follow‑Up – Set a reminder to revisit the conversation in a week; iterate based on responses.
  6. Audit Your Presence – Look at past posts; remove or revise anything that contradicts your declared side.
  7. Celebrate Small Wins – Did a colleague thank you for your perspective? Did you feel lighter after posting? Acknowledge it.

7. Overcoming the Fear of “Being Labelled”

The biggest mental block is the fear that once you pick a side, you’ll be pigeonholed forever. Remember:

  • Labels are tools, not prisons. “Activist” can open doors to collaborations you’d otherwise miss.
  • Your side can evolve. As new information arrives, you can pivot—just be transparent about the change.
  • People respect consistency more than conformity. A brand that constantly flips its stance loses trust faster than one that stands firm, even when unpopular.

Closing Thought

“Speak yourself your own way” isn’t a call for loudness; it’s a summons for honesty. It’s the invitation to pick a side, not because the world demands it, but because your inner compass demands it. When you do, you carve out a space where others can find you, understand you, and, most importantly, choose to walk alongside you.

So, what side will you claim today? Write it, shout it, tweet it, discuss it over coffee—just make sure it’s yours, unmistakably and unapologetically.

Your voice is the most valuable currency you have. Spend it wisely.


Ready to take the first step? Drop a comment below with your one‑sentence declaration. Let’s start a dialogue that proves speaking for yourself, your own way, really does change the conversation.

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 63

Day 63 – Criticism

To What Extent Should We Take on Criticism?

When feedback feels like a gift, a weapon, or something in‑between, how do we decide what to keep?


1. The Three Faces of Criticism

TypeWhat It Looks LikeWhat It Does to YouHow to Spot It
Constructive“I love your concept, but the pacing feels rushed. Maybe try a slower intro?”Sparks curiosity, nudges improvement, builds confidence.Specific, actionable, delivered with respect.
Soul‑Destroying“You’re terrible at this. Nobody will ever take you seriously.”Triggers shame, self‑doubt, and in extreme cases, burnout.Vague, personal attacks, “you’re” language, often unqualified.
Context‑Dependent“Your work is okay, but… [insert personal bias]Can feel uplifting or crushing depending on your mindset that day.Mixed signals: compliments tangled with criticism, delivered by someone whose opinion you value (or fear).

Bottom line: Not all criticism is created equal. Recognizing the category is the first step toward deciding whether to let it in.


2. Why Our State of Mind Matters

Our brain is a filter—it amplifies what it’s primed to hear.

  • Stress‑High, Confidence‑Low → Even a gentle suggestion can feel like a dagger.
  • Rested, Curious, & Secure → The same suggestion is a roadmap.

Neuroscience backs this up: under cortisol spikes, the amygdala hijacks the prefrontal cortex, making us react emotionally before we can reason. In other words, the same words can be a lifeline or a landmine—depending on the internal weather.


3. A Quick Self‑Check Before You Swallow (or Spit Out) Feedback

  1. Pause. Take three breaths.
  2. Identify the source.
    • Authority? Peer? Stranger?
    • Do they have expertise or a vested interest?
  3. Ask yourself:
    • Is the feedback specific?
    • Does it focus on the work, not the person?
    • Is there a pattern or is this a one‑off?
  4. Rate the impact (1‑5).
    • 1‑2 = Minimal (maybe let it drift away).
    • 3 = Worth a second look.
    • 4‑5 = Deep dive required—either to apply or to guard against toxicity.

If the answer to “Is it specific?” is no, you’re probably dealing with soul‑destroying or context‑dependent criticism. If it’s yes, you’ve likely encountered something constructive.


4. Strategies for Each Kind

A. Constructive Criticism – Welcome It Home

  • Summarise and confirm. “So you’re saying the climax needs more tension?”
  • Create an action plan. Turn the suggestion into a tiny experiment.
  • Give thanks. A simple “Thanks for pointing that out” reinforces healthy feedback loops.

B. Soul‑Destroying Criticism – Set Boundaries

  • Detach the person from the message. “I hear you’re upset, but I’m not going to let this define me.”
  • Limit exposure. If it’s a chronic source (e.g., a toxic boss), consider escalation, mediation, or a change in environment.
  • Re‑anchor with evidence. List recent successes, testimonials, or metrics that counteract the negativity.

C. Context‑Dependent Criticism – Check Your Lens

  • Mind‑state audit. Ask, “Am I already feeling insecure about this?” If yes, give yourself a grace period before reacting.
  • Seek a second opinion. Ask a trusted colleague: “What do you think of this feedback?”
  • Experiment with reframing. Turn “Your design feels too busy” into “How can we simplify the visual hierarchy?” – you keep agency over the direction.

5. Building a Resilient Feedback Muscle

PracticeHow It WorksTime Investment
Morning “Feedback Forecast”Write down one thing you’re open to hearing that day.5 min
Weekly “Critique De‑brief”Review all feedback received, categorize, and log actions taken.15 min
Monthly “Mindset Reset”Meditate or journal on successes; remind yourself of your core values.10‑20 min
Quarterly “Source Audit”Evaluate who’s influencing your perception—keep the constructive, prune the toxic.30 min

Consistent practice turns the act of receiving criticism from a high‑stakes gamble into a low‑stakes habit.


6. When to Say “No, Thanks”

  • If the criticism is a personal attack – you have the right to walk away.
  • If it’s coming from someone who consistently undermines you – consider limiting that relationship.
  • If it’s irrelevant to your goals – politely thank them and redirect: “I appreciate your viewpoint; I’m focusing on X right now.”

Saying “no” isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a declaration that you are the steward of your own growth.


7. Takeaway Cheat Sheet

QuestionAnswerAction
Is the feedback specific and about the work?Yes → Likely constructive.Take notes, apply, thank.
Is the tone attacking or demeaning?Yes → Soul‑destroying.Set boundaries, seek support, document.
Am I feeling vulnerable right now?Yes → Context‑dependent.Pause, revisit later, get a second opinion.
Do I trust the source’s expertise?No → Treat with caution.Verify, ask clarifying questions, research.

Print this table, stick it on your desk, and refer to it the next time a comment lands in your inbox.


Closing Thought

Criticism is inevitable—like the weather, it will come in sun, rain, or storms. The art isn’t in how much we take on; it’s in what we choose to carry forward. By learning to read the type of feedback, checking our mental climate, and setting intentional boundaries, we transform criticism from a potential wrecking ball into a sculptor’s tool.

So, the next time someone says, “That could be better,” ask yourself: “Is this a chisel or a hammer?” And then decide whether to pick it up, set it down, or toss it aside.

Happy creating, staying resilient, and curating the feedback that truly serves you.


If this post resonated with you, share it with a friend who could use a healthier relationship with criticism, or drop a comment below with your own strategies for sifting the good from the gut‑punch.

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 63

Day 63 – Criticism

To What Extent Should We Take on Criticism?

When feedback feels like a gift, a weapon, or something in‑between, how do we decide what to keep?


1. The Three Faces of Criticism

TypeWhat It Looks LikeWhat It Does to YouHow to Spot It
Constructive“I love your concept, but the pacing feels rushed. Maybe try a slower intro?”Sparks curiosity, nudges improvement, builds confidence.Specific, actionable, delivered with respect.
Soul‑Destroying“You’re terrible at this. Nobody will ever take you seriously.”Triggers shame, self‑doubt, and in extreme cases, burnout.Vague, personal attacks, “you’re” language, often unqualified.
Context‑Dependent“Your work is okay, but… [insert personal bias]Can feel uplifting or crushing depending on your mindset that day.Mixed signals: compliments tangled with criticism, delivered by someone whose opinion you value (or fear).

Bottom line: Not all criticism is created equal. Recognizing the category is the first step toward deciding whether to let it in.


2. Why Our State of Mind Matters

Our brain is a filter—it amplifies what it’s primed to hear.

  • Stress‑High, Confidence‑Low → Even a gentle suggestion can feel like a dagger.
  • Rested, Curious, & Secure → The same suggestion is a roadmap.

Neuroscience backs this up: under cortisol spikes, the amygdala hijacks the prefrontal cortex, making us react emotionally before we can reason. In other words, the same words can be a lifeline or a landmine—depending on the internal weather.


3. A Quick Self‑Check Before You Swallow (or Spit Out) Feedback

  1. Pause. Take three breaths.
  2. Identify the source.
    • Authority? Peer? Stranger?
    • Do they have expertise or a vested interest?
  3. Ask yourself:
    • Is the feedback specific?
    • Does it focus on the work, not the person?
    • Is there a pattern or is this a one‑off?
  4. Rate the impact (1‑5).
    • 1‑2 = Minimal (maybe let it drift away).
    • 3 = Worth a second look.
    • 4‑5 = Deep dive required—either to apply or to guard against toxicity.

If the answer to “Is it specific?” is no, you’re probably dealing with soul‑destroying or context‑dependent criticism. If it’s yes, you’ve likely encountered something constructive.


4. Strategies for Each Kind

A. Constructive Criticism – Welcome It Home

  • Summarise and confirm. “So you’re saying the climax needs more tension?”
  • Create an action plan. Turn the suggestion into a tiny experiment.
  • Give thanks. A simple “Thanks for pointing that out” reinforces healthy feedback loops.

B. Soul‑Destroying Criticism – Set Boundaries

  • Detach the person from the message. “I hear you’re upset, but I’m not going to let this define me.”
  • Limit exposure. If it’s a chronic source (e.g., a toxic boss), consider escalation, mediation, or a change in environment.
  • Re‑anchor with evidence. List recent successes, testimonials, or metrics that counteract the negativity.

C. Context‑Dependent Criticism – Check Your Lens

  • Mind‑state audit. Ask, “Am I already feeling insecure about this?” If yes, give yourself a grace period before reacting.
  • Seek a second opinion. Ask a trusted colleague: “What do you think of this feedback?”
  • Experiment with reframing. Turn “Your design feels too busy” into “How can we simplify the visual hierarchy?” – you keep agency over the direction.

5. Building a Resilient Feedback Muscle

PracticeHow It WorksTime Investment
Morning “Feedback Forecast”Write down one thing you’re open to hearing that day.5 min
Weekly “Critique De‑brief”Review all feedback received, categorize, and log actions taken.15 min
Monthly “Mindset Reset”Meditate or journal on successes; remind yourself of your core values.10‑20 min
Quarterly “Source Audit”Evaluate who’s influencing your perception—keep the constructive, prune the toxic.30 min

Consistent practice turns the act of receiving criticism from a high‑stakes gamble into a low‑stakes habit.


6. When to Say “No, Thanks”

  • If the criticism is a personal attack – you have the right to walk away.
  • If it’s coming from someone who consistently undermines you – consider limiting that relationship.
  • If it’s irrelevant to your goals – politely thank them and redirect: “I appreciate your viewpoint; I’m focusing on X right now.”

Saying “no” isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a declaration that you are the steward of your own growth.


7. Takeaway Cheat Sheet

QuestionAnswerAction
Is the feedback specific and about the work?Yes → Likely constructive.Take notes, apply, thank.
Is the tone attacking or demeaning?Yes → Soul‑destroying.Set boundaries, seek support, document.
Am I feeling vulnerable right now?Yes → Context‑dependent.Pause, revisit later, get a second opinion.
Do I trust the source’s expertise?No → Treat with caution.Verify, ask clarifying questions, research.

Print this table, stick it on your desk, and refer to it the next time a comment lands in your inbox.


Closing Thought

Criticism is inevitable—like the weather, it will come in sun, rain, or storms. The art isn’t in how much we take on; it’s in what we choose to carry forward. By learning to read the type of feedback, checking our mental climate, and setting intentional boundaries, we transform criticism from a potential wrecking ball into a sculptor’s tool.

So, the next time someone says, “That could be better,” ask yourself: “Is this a chisel or a hammer?” And then decide whether to pick it up, set it down, or toss it aside.

Happy creating, staying resilient, and curating the feedback that truly serves you.


If this post resonated with you, share it with a friend who could use a healthier relationship with criticism, or drop a comment below with your own strategies for sifting the good from the gut‑punch.