Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 9

I have been working on the story, the editor is asking for a second draft after making suggested changes – and I’m now working on it

Today Jack is about to become as confused as he ever will be. Well, maybe not as ever, but it’s the start of a time when he will not know what is happening.

Firstly, there’s Maryanne. Whilst the full extent of the enigma she will be for nearly three-quarters of the book, may need a little adjustment when it comes to the first edit, I know something about her now, and those characteristics will gradually be dropped in front of the reader.

Some will say, after this chapter, that she is in trouble. Jack has known that from the start, but that assessment really comes from a distinct lack of understanding of women in general. Yes, he had had girlfriends, but not like Maryanne.

And, before you asked, yes, she is, in part, modelled on a woman I once knew, and she was nothing like any other woman I had known. She was genuinely a beautiful soul, and very much misunderstood.

Jack is fortunate in that he is hesitant to take that last step, though I suspect he might want to, but there are reasons for holding back.

These will be more apparent in the next chapter … I hope.

It’s written in my head, and I’m tempted to stay up and write it, but it’s late, and life other than being a writer will impinge on my time tomorrow.

More tomorrow.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 13

We are at the end of Henry’s sojourn and nearly four months have passed, what seems like a lifetime for both.

Michelle is back at work and using drugs to deaden the experience.

Henry is dreading going back home, because he has nowhere else to go, and he will not be seeing Michelle.  That ship, pardon the pun, has sailed.

Felix, The Turk’s enforcer (The Turk is the man who owns the parlours that Michelle and her friends work in, and the man to whom Michelle has an obligation when he forgave her drug debt) goes to see him and tells him Michelle is off to see Henry.

She had found out where and when he was returning and planned to meet him and tell him the truth, and maybe why they could not be together.  The Turk is sure she’ll return.  Now she’s back on drugs, he says Henry will be disgusted and that’ll be the end of it.

In her current state, far from how she looked back in Morganville, he might be right.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 12

This is just not going to work

I had in mind right about now to find all the reasons why this romance would not work.

Michelle is not telling him the truth about her situation.  We want to believe she had found the love of her life, but is it that she has found something that she’s not had before, and it’s too late?

Her path was chosen for her, perhaps, when she allowed others to lead her down a path that eventually led to self-destruction.  Yes, she has tried to escape, twice, but inevitably she finds her way back, thinking the city is large enough she can make a new start.

She is wrong.  Why didn’t she move to the other side of the country, or even overseas?  Perhaps it was an obligation she felt to help those who had helped her escape.

The big question here is whether we let our past define us.  Do we try and find a way out of the wreckage, and try to get back on track?  It seems the situation is hopeless, or so we are led to believe.

However, the last date was when she was supposed to tell Henry it was over, that she could not be his girlfriend., but couldn’t.  He had to hear that from another source.

And, what he hears, leads him to believe there is no future for them.

Ships are great places to hide away from the rest of the world.

Henry has to endure a short period when he cannot bring himself to tell anyone what had happened, and then, at the end of the tour he takes a position on another ship, roaming the ocean for at least three months, island hopping.

He needs a sojourn, time to think, and any letters she sends, for what reason he cannot fathom, are consigned to the bottom drawer, unopened.  He is, he tells himself, done with her.

But never far from his thoughts, he decided to learn as much about her as he can, and turns to the newspaper archives, and the reporter who wrote most of the articles, none very flattering about her, and then talks to her about Michelle.

High flying model, absolute success, met the wrong man, got into drugs, and spiralled downwards from there.  She ended up addicted, and eventually a prostitute.  Not exactly what he wanted to hear, but it explained everything.

And yet, the person he met, the girl he fell in love with, was so far removed from that description, he could not understand anything.

Meanwhile, Michelle, oblivious to the fact he had overheard her conversation, cannot understand why he does not communicate with her, and cannot be found.

Time passes, and she cannot keep the man who runs her life now at bay for much longer, and then, it’s back to the snake pit with her friends; and the drugs, sitting on the kitchen bench, are a strong reminder of how she used to shut it all out.

Will the temptation get the better of her?

It’s a pivotal part of the story, and in the traditional romance, it’s the ‘boy loses the girl’ usually to a misunderstanding.

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 9

I have been working on the story, the editor is asking for a second draft after making suggested changes – and I’m now working on it

Today Jack is about to become as confused as he ever will be. Well, maybe not as ever, but it’s the start of a time when he will not know what is happening.

Firstly, there’s Maryanne. Whilst the full extent of the enigma she will be for nearly three-quarters of the book, may need a little adjustment when it comes to the first edit, I know something about her now, and those characteristics will gradually be dropped in front of the reader.

Some will say, after this chapter, that she is in trouble. Jack has known that from the start, but that assessment really comes from a distinct lack of understanding of women in general. Yes, he had had girlfriends, but not like Maryanne.

And, before you asked, yes, she is, in part, modelled on a woman I once knew, and she was nothing like any other woman I had known. She was genuinely a beautiful soul, and very much misunderstood.

Jack is fortunate in that he is hesitant to take that last step, though I suspect he might want to, but there are reasons for holding back.

These will be more apparent in the next chapter … I hope.

It’s written in my head, and I’m tempted to stay up and write it, but it’s late, and life other than being a writer will impinge on my time tomorrow.

More tomorrow.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 13

We are at the end of Henry’s sojourn and nearly four months have passed, what seems like a lifetime for both.

Michelle is back at work and using drugs to deaden the experience.

Henry is dreading going back home, because he has nowhere else to go, and he will not be seeing Michelle.  That ship, pardon the pun, has sailed.

Felix, The Turk’s enforcer (The Turk is the man who owns the parlours that Michelle and her friends work in, and the man to whom Michelle has an obligation when he forgave her drug debt) goes to see him and tells him Michelle is off to see Henry.

She had found out where and when he was returning and planned to meet him and tell him the truth, and maybe why they could not be together.  The Turk is sure she’ll return.  Now she’s back on drugs, he says Henry will be disgusted and that’ll be the end of it.

In her current state, far from how she looked back in Morganville, he might be right.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 13

We are at the end of Henry’s sojourn and nearly four months have passed, what seems like a lifetime for both.

Michelle is back at work and using drugs to deaden the experience.

Henry is dreading going back home, because he has nowhere else to go, and he will not be seeing Michelle.  That ship, pardon the pun, has sailed.

Felix, The Turk’s enforcer (The Turk is the man who owns the parlours that Michelle and her friends work in, and the man to whom Michelle has an obligation when he forgave her drug debt) goes to see him and tells him Michelle is off to see Henry.

She had found out where and when he was returning and planned to meet him and tell him the truth, and maybe why they could not be together.  The Turk is sure she’ll return.  Now she’s back on drugs, he says Henry will be disgusted and that’ll be the end of it.

In her current state, far from how she looked back in Morganville, he might be right.

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 8

I have been working on the story, the editor is asking for a second draft after making suggested changes – and I’m now working on it

The story proceeds. That underlying suspicion of Maryanne’s motives rears its head again, but for different reasons.

Of course, Jack, the main character has a name, if not a little trite but it suits him, has always been suspicious because he’s not the type to be approached by beautiful women, and yet, so far has managed to allay those fears but is the perfect companion.

But, what’s a self-confessed gate crasher got up her sleeve.

Out of the hospital and on their road trip, they’re heading for an island and a hotel that overlooks the Mediterranean, which might be synonymous with the perfect location for romance.

But all of that is shattered when he sees her with another man, at the rear of the ferry, and the animation in her manner tells him the man is not just someone who ran into her.

Jack knows who it is, and what he does, so that makes the meeting even more mysterious.

And perhaps dangerous.

Yes, we are exploring the theme of ‘everyone has secrets’.

More tomorrow.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 12

This is just not going to work

I had in mind right about now to find all the reasons why this romance would not work.

Michelle is not telling him the truth about her situation.  We want to believe she had found the love of her life, but is it that she has found something that she’s not had before, and it’s too late?

Her path was chosen for her, perhaps, when she allowed others to lead her down a path that eventually led to self-destruction.  Yes, she has tried to escape, twice, but inevitably she finds her way back, thinking the city is large enough she can make a new start.

She is wrong.  Why didn’t she move to the other side of the country, or even overseas?  Perhaps it was an obligation she felt to help those who had helped her escape.

The big question here is whether we let our past define us.  Do we try and find a way out of the wreckage, and try to get back on track?  It seems the situation is hopeless, or so we are led to believe.

However, the last date was when she was supposed to tell Henry it was over, that she could not be his girlfriend., but couldn’t.  He had to hear that from another source.

And, what he hears, leads him to believe there is no future for them.

Ships are great places to hide away from the rest of the world.

Henry has to endure a short period when he cannot bring himself to tell anyone what had happened, and then, at the end of the tour he takes a position on another ship, roaming the ocean for at least three months, island hopping.

He needs a sojourn, time to think, and any letters she sends, for what reason he cannot fathom, are consigned to the bottom drawer, unopened.  He is, he tells himself, done with her.

But never far from his thoughts, he decided to learn as much about her as he can, and turns to the newspaper archives, and the reporter who wrote most of the articles, none very flattering about her, and then talks to her about Michelle.

High flying model, absolute success, met the wrong man, got into drugs, and spiralled downwards from there.  She ended up addicted, and eventually a prostitute.  Not exactly what he wanted to hear, but it explained everything.

And yet, the person he met, the girl he fell in love with, was so far removed from that description, he could not understand anything.

Meanwhile, Michelle, oblivious to the fact he had overheard her conversation, cannot understand why he does not communicate with her, and cannot be found.

Time passes, and she cannot keep the man who runs her life now at bay for much longer, and then, it’s back to the snake pit with her friends; and the drugs, sitting on the kitchen bench, are a strong reminder of how she used to shut it all out.

Will the temptation get the better of her?

It’s a pivotal part of the story, and in the traditional romance, it’s the ‘boy loses the girl’ usually to a misunderstanding.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 11

Absence is supposed to make the heart grow stronger.

But…

This is no ordinary romance.  There’s a great big ocean between them, in more ways than one.  Getting off that ocean, getting to the port, and getting to the girl is proving a very hard task indeed.

Ships have a mind of their own.

Then the planets align…

This date starts out badly.  Henry is running behind time, and, the meeting place is, well, far from being private.  It’s like he’s in the middle of a spy novel, finding himself surveilling the crowded public square …. For what?

She’s there but hardly acknowledging his presence.

Then he feels the presence of another, hiding in plain sight.

Something is amiss.  Michelle is on edge, and from the, the date goes downhill.

They get some time ‘alone’, and words are spoken, but they’re not anywhere near what he had hoped to hear.  There’s fallout from the last date, and we learn a little more about who and what Michelle is, and why she is acting this way.

In a desperate attempt to win her over, Henry proposes marriage.

It doesn’t work.

They part, but not before that old adage ‘eavesdroppers never hear anything good about themselves’ which sends him into a deeper spiral of despair.

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 8

I have been working on the story, the editor is asking for a second draft after making suggested changes – and I’m now working on it

The story proceeds. That underlying suspicion of Maryanne’s motives rears its head again, but for different reasons.

Of course, Jack, the main character has a name, if not a little trite but it suits him, has always been suspicious because he’s not the type to be approached by beautiful women, and yet, so far has managed to allay those fears but is the perfect companion.

But, what’s a self-confessed gate crasher got up her sleeve.

Out of the hospital and on their road trip, they’re heading for an island and a hotel that overlooks the Mediterranean, which might be synonymous with the perfect location for romance.

But all of that is shattered when he sees her with another man, at the rear of the ferry, and the animation in her manner tells him the man is not just someone who ran into her.

Jack knows who it is, and what he does, so that makes the meeting even more mysterious.

And perhaps dangerous.

Yes, we are exploring the theme of ‘everyone has secrets’.

More tomorrow.