Author: aloysius5

Over the years, I have traveled extensively and kept journals, with the idea that one day all of those places would become locations in books. Notebooks filled with odd characters, people and incidents observed, and whole tracts of stories written when the on the spot inspiration has been a driving force. All of this is the basis of the first three novels, Sunday In New York, set, of course, in New York, probably my favorite city in the world, “Echoes From The Past’ equally set in New York, Brooklyn Heights and Philadelphia. The third, The Devil You Don’t, travels through Europe, starting in Geneva, moving to Rome, then Sorrento, and then to Venice. Now, my passion to write is fuelled by travel and fine dining. When I take a break from these, I get to torment my three wonderful grandchildren whom I actively encourage to read as much as they can, and more recently to also write. As for almost every other writer, I would not be able to do any of this without my wife who has put up with my moodiness, the times when I'm locked away in a room trying to push out another 2,000 words, and yet despite everything still puts up with me. I wish I could say the same for our cat. Alas, I am still trying to work out how to be his friend!

The 2am Rant: Betwixt metaphorical houses

It’s like working in two offices, one uptown, and one downtown.

I have two blogs, this one, and another which is purely for writing, and generally, a lot of starts and not a lot of finishes. I get ideas, and it’s a place to store them, and give a few people some amusement at my, sometimes, improbable situations and far-fetched stories.

Here I try to be more serious.

I have the ceiling, the cinema of my dreams. Here anything is possible, like jumping from a helicopter about to explode, and survive, and get out of a sinking ship, like Houdini. Of course, there is always one time when it doesn’t work, and Houdini knows that all too well.

Over there, I have a series which I started here, long ago, where I take a photograph and write a story inspired by it. The interesting thing about that is I could probably use the same photograph over and over, and it would inspire a different tale.

I know, if I was running a writing class, everyone would see that photograph differently.

But what amazes me sometimes is the fact the story is not directly related to the theme. It got me thinking about how we view our experiences, and what triggers memories. I’ve discovered that it doesn’t necessarily happen by correlation, say, for instance, a memory of being in New York might be triggered by a visit to a cafe in Cloncurry.

I try to do one of these every day, but sometimes it’s hard work. Writing itself can be some days, particularly when the words are lurking there, behind that invisible, impenetrable, rock wall.

OK, so I’m stuck in the middle of writing a piece over there, and I’ve come over here to whinge.

But, enough. I’ll let you know what the cinema of my dreams is showing, later.

Writing a book in 365 days – 346

Day 346

How to Keep Your Writing Fresh – Ditch the Clichés (and Use a Few Sparingly, If You Must)

Introduction

We’ve all been there: you sit down to write a blog, a sales email, or a novel chapter, and before you know it your prose is peppered with phrases like “think outside the box,” “at the end of the day,” or “the sky’s the limit.” Clichés feel safe because they’re familiar, but they also signal lazy thinking, dilute your voice, and can even turn readers off.

So how do you keep your writing crisp, original, and engaging? And if a cliché is the perfect punchline for a specific moment, how can you wield it without sounding trite? Below is a practical, step‑by‑step guide to help you banish the overused and, when necessary, deploy a cliché with surgical precision.

1. Know What a Cliché Actually Is

DefinitionWhy It’s Problematic
A phrase, idea, or trope that has been overused to the point of losing its original impact.It signals a lack of original thought, can feel generic, and often triggers “mental fatigue” in readers.

Key takeaway: Not every familiar phrase is a cliché. Idioms (“break a leg”) and widely accepted terminology (“search engine optimization”) are fine when they serve a clear purpose.

2. Identify the Clichés in Your Own Writing

  1. Read Aloud – Hearing the words forces you to notice rhythm and repetition.
  2. Highlight “Red Flags” – Words like obviously, basically, in today’s fast‑paced world, think outside the box, win-win.
  3. Use a Cliché Detector
    • Online tools (e.g., Cliché Finder or ProWritingAid).
    • Browser extensions that underline overused phrases in real time.

Pro tip: Keep a personal “cliché cheat sheet.” Whenever you catch yourself reaching for a tired phrase, jot it down and replace it later.

3. Replace, Not Remove – Strategies for Fresh Alternatives

ClichéWhy It’s OverusedFresh Alternative
“Think outside the box”Corporate buzzword“Explore unconventional angles”
“At the end of the day”Conversational filler“Ultimately” or “When all is said and done”
“The sky’s the limit”Over‑optimistic hype“The possibilities are endless”
“In today’s fast‑paced world”Generic time‑setter“In an era of rapid change”

How to Generate Alternatives:

  • Ask “Why?” – What’s the core idea? Answer that directly.
  • Swap nouns and verbs – Replace box with a concrete image relevant to your niche.
  • Use vivid sensory language – “The horizon expands before us” feels more poetic than “the sky’s the limit.”

4. Embrace Specificity Over Generality

Bad: “She was very happy.”
Good: “She beamed, her eyes sparkling like sunrise on the lake.”

Specific details make the scene vivid, leaving no room for lazy shorthand.

5. When a Cliché Is the Perfect Fit – Use It Sparingly & Strategically

Sometimes a cliché can act as an anchor—a shared cultural reference that instantly connects you with readers. If you decide to keep one, follow these guidelines:

5.1. Make It Contextual

  • Tie it to your unique narrative.
    • Example: Instead of the generic “It’s a win‑win situation,” write, “Our partnership is a win‑win: you get a 20 % discount, and we gain a long‑term client who loves our eco‑friendly packaging.”

5.2. Add a Twist

  • Subvert expectations.
    • Example: “We told the team to think outside the box—but first, we built a bigger box.”
    • This acknowledges the cliché, then flips it, showing cleverness.

5.3. Pair It With Strong Imagery

  • Bolster the cliché with fresh description.
    • Example: “At the end of the day, the city lights flickered like fireflies caught in a jar, reminding us that even the busiest streets need moments of calm.”

5.4. Limit Frequency

  • One per paragraph, maximum two per piece.
    • This keeps the impact high without overwhelming the reader.

6. Practice Exercise: Rewrite the Cliché‑Heavy Paragraph

Original (cliché‑laden):

“In today’s fast‑paced world, businesses need to think outside the box if they want to stay ahead. At the end of the day, it’s all about delivering value and creating win‑win solutions for customers and shareholders alike.”

Revised (cliché‑free):

“In an era of rapid change, companies must explore unconventional strategies to maintain a competitive edge. Ultimately, success hinges on delivering genuine value and forging mutually beneficial relationships with both customers and investors.”

What Changed?

  • Replaced “fast‑paced world” with “era of rapid change.”
  • Swapped “think outside the box” for “explore unconventional strategies.”
  • Substituted “at the end of the day” with “ultimately.”
  • Turned “win‑win solutions” into “mutually beneficial relationships.”

7. Checklist Before Publishing

  •  Did I scan for common clichés?
  •  Have I replaced every red‑flag phrase with a specific, vivid alternative?
  •  If a cliché remains, does it serve a strategic purpose?
  •  Have I added a twist or unique imagery to that cliché?
  •  Is the overall tone consistent with my brand voice?

Conclusion

Clichés are the linguistic equivalent of fast food: instantly satisfying but nutritionally lacking. By actively identifying, replacing, and only strategically preserving a few, you’ll elevate your writing from “just okay” to “memorable.”

Remember: your words are a reflection of your thought process. The more original they are, the more credibility you earn with every sentence. So next time you feel the urge to lean on a tired phrase, pause, dig deeper, and craft something that truly belongs to you—cliché or not.

Happy writing!

Feel free to share your favourite “cliché‑with‑a‑twist” in the comments below.

Top 5 sights on the road less travelled – Pristina

Beyond the Beaten Path: 5 Unique Things to Do in Pristina Off the Road Less Travelled

When most travellers think of Pristina, Kosovo’s capital often appears as a quick stopover—somewhere you pass through en route to mountains, monasteries, or ancient towns. But those who linger discover a city pulsing with youthful energy, raw history, and hidden cultural gems just beneath the surface. While the Newborn Monument and the National Library are well-worth a visit, true authenticity lies beyond the guidebook checklists.

For the curious explorer who craves unique experiences, local life, and a deeper connection with the city’s soul, here are five unforgettable things to do in Pristina—off the beaten path and away from the tourist trail.

1. Explore Graffiti Lane: Pristina’s Open-Air Street Art Gallery

Tucked behind the National Gallery of Kosovo on Rruga Gani Koci, you’ll find a narrow, unassuming alley that bursts with colour, rebellion, and storytelling. Locally known as Graffiti Lane, this urban canvas is Kosovo’s most vibrant street art hub, where local and international artists use spray paint to express political commentary, cultural pride, and personal dreams.

Unlike curated galleries, this space evolves constantly. One week you might see a tribute to Ibrahim Rugova, Kosovo’s former president; the next, a surreal portrait of a woman wearing traditional pletë (embroidered headdress) morphing into a galaxy.

Pro Tip: Visit in the late afternoon when local artists often hang around to touch up their work—strike up a conversation. You might walk away with a new friend and a deeper understanding of Kosovo’s post-war identity.

2. Sip Traditional Rakia at a Hidden Family-Owned Konoba

Forget fancy rooftop bars (though Pristina has those too). For a taste of real Kosovar hospitality, head to Konoba Kalaja—a cozy, stone-walled tavern tucked into the hillside of the Old Town district, near the remains of Pristina Castle.

This isn’t a tourist trap; it’s a family-run eatery where time slows down. Wooden beams, clay pots, and flickering candles set the mood as you’re served homemade rakia (a strong fruit brandy) and slow-cooked dishes like tava kosi (baked lamb with yogurt) or grilled qebapa (seasoned minced meat sausages).

Locals bring their grandfathers here. The owner, Gjergj, might pull out a two-string lahuta and sing a folk tune if you’re lucky. There’s no menu in English—just point, smile, and trust the kitchen. This is how Kosovo feeds its soul.

3. Join a Local Philosopher on a “Coffee & Conversation” Walk

In a city where university students outnumber skyscrapers, intellectual conversation is part of the culture. Through local community initiatives like Qendra Multimedia, you can sign up for a unique experience: a guided “philosophy walk” led by university students or professors.

Over slow-sipping espressos at tucked-away cafés like Cafe Du Coin or Pompik, you’ll discuss everything from Kosovo’s nation-building challenges to existentialism, all while strolling through quiet neighbourhoods like Velania or Lagjja Çnarama.

It’s not a tour—it’s a dialogue. And it might just be the most human connection you make on your entire trip.

4. Discover Forgotten Trains at the Abandoned Railway Station

On the outskirts of Pristina, hidden behind wild grass and graffiti-tagged fences, lies a relic of a bygone era: the city’s disused railway station. Once part of a regional Balkan rail network, the station has been inactive for decades, but its decaying platforms, rusted tracks, and crumbling waiting rooms tell a poignant story of missed connections and unrealised potential.

Urban explorers and photographers love this spot. Wander among silent freight cars overtaken by vines, peer into abandoned ticket booths where dust coats vintage typewriters, and imagine Pristina as a crossroads of Yugoslav-era travel.

Note: This is not an official tourist site—visit respectfully and safely. Early morning or late afternoon light makes for the most hauntingly beautiful photos.

5. Attend an Underground Live Music Night at Pulp

Tucked inside a repurposed printing house in central Pristina, Pulp is more than a bar—it’s a cultural heartbeat. By day, it’s a café with indie books and artisan coffee. By night, it transforms into Kosovo’s most authentic live music venue, hosting a diverse range of acts, from jazz trios and experimental electronic sets to punk bands and spoken word poetry.

The crowd is young, local, and politically aware. Performances are intimate—sometimes just a mic and a guitar in a room that holds fifty people max. There’s no cover charge, but donations keep the lights on.

Check their Facebook page before you go; nights are irregular, but if you catch one, you’re witnessing Kosovo’s creative resistance in real time.

Final Thoughts: Pristina Reveals Itself Slowly

Pristina doesn’t dazzle at first glance. Its charm is in the cracks—in the laughter over a shared bottle of rakia, the poetry scrawled on an alley wall, the silent echo of a train track that once led everywhere.

The top five attractions on any standard list will show you the city’s face. But these five offbeat experiences? They’ll let you feel its pulse.

So next time you’re in Pristina, skip the crowded cafés on Mother Teresa Boulevard. Turn down a narrow street, say “yes” to an invitation you don’t fully understand, and let the real Kosovo welcome you in.

Traveler’s Checklist:

  • Wear comfortable shoes for Graffiti Lane and the old station.
  • Bring small bills for konobas and donations at Pulp.
  • Learn a few Albanian phrases—“Faleminderit” (thank you) goes a long way.
  • Respect local customs—especially in family-run spaces.

Pristina isn’t just a destination. It’s a conversation. Come ready to listen.

What I learned about writing – It’s hard to decide what to do next

I’m finding it hard to get into the groove.  I suspect I have not been in one lately, but I was writing, and the stories were coming together.

My most significant accomplishments seem to come when I write 50,000 words or more for a NANOWRIMO book.  Interestingly, it appears to be the only time I can focus my mind on writing.  Last November, though, was the first time that I didn’t finish it, even though I’d got about 65,000 words done.

I have no idea why, on those occasions, the creative mind is organised, and the ideas and words flow.  I know it was just supposed to be raw writing, but on one occasion, I even had time to rewrite the start.  As we all know, by the time you get to the end, a lot of stuff at the start needs to be fixed, especially in light of plot changes and continuity.

Unless, of course, you’re a planner, which I’m not.

Now, looking at one of the novels on the screen, I have the job of editing and rewriting, after waiting the requisite few months between finishing the rough draft and starting on the polishing.

It seems that April is the month to be doing the first editing, and I may still be on track for that to happen as I’ve continued writing past November, through January, and now have written nearly 140,000 words.  It was not supposed to be this long, but it is the story writing itself.  There are only a few chapters to go, so it’s looking good to finish this month and give it a rest before April.

In the meantime, slipping further and further on the schedule is the sequel to What Sets Us Apart, called Strangers We’ve Become. I’ve finally got to editing several times, and it’s nearly done. 

But here’s the thing.

It’s all but done and dusted, and I was doing a final read before handing it to the editor for one last check.  That was a mistake.  I seem to be one of those writers who can’t let it go.  I should not have picked it up for a re-read!

I don’t know if anyone else has the same problem, but as soon as I had finished it, I had a feeling (oh no, not one of those feelings, I can hear the editor saying) and something was not quite right.  Perhaps I’ll put it back down again and think some more about it.

Perhaps I should just pour another drink and go back to watching ice hockey because the Maple Leafs are doing well at the moment.

OK, I just had an idea for the third book in the series.

“Sunday in New York”, a romantic adventure that’s not a walk in the park!

“Sunday in New York” is ultimately a story about trust, and what happens when a marriage is stretched to its limits.

When Harry Steele attends a lunch with his manager, Barclay, to discuss a promotion that any junior executive would accept in a heartbeat, it is the fact his wife, Alison, who previously professed her reservations about Barclay, also agreed to attend, that casts a small element of doubt in his mind.

From that moment, his life, in the company, in deciding what to do, his marriage, his very life, spirals out of control.

There is no one big factor that can prove Harry’s worst fears, that his marriage is over, just a number of small, interconnecting events, when piled on top of each other, points to a cataclysmic end to everything he had believed in.

Trust is lost firstly in his best friend and mentor, Andy, who only hints of impending disaster, Sasha, a woman whom he saved, and who appears to have motives of her own, and then in his wife, Alison, as he discovered piece by piece damning evidence she is about to leave him for another man.

Can we trust what we see with our eyes or trust what we hear?

Haven’t we all jumped to conclusions at least once in our lives?

Can Alison, a woman whose self-belief and confidence is about to be put to the ultimate test, find a way of proving their relationship is as strong as it has ever been?

As they say in the classics, read on!

Purchase:

http://tinyurl.com/Amazon-SundayInNewYork

Top 5 sights on the road less travelled – Valetta

Discover Valletta’s Hidden Gems: A Road Less Travelled Through Malta’s Capital

If you’ve ever visited Valletta, you know it’s a city of grandeur: a UNESCO World Heritage site with Baroque splendour, ancient fortresses, and sweeping sea views. But beyond the bustling Barrakka Gardens and the famed St. John’s Co-Cathedral lies a Valletta waiting to be discovered—one filled with quiet courtyards, local secrets, and lesser-known stories. For travellers seeking an off-the-beaten-path experience, here are five extraordinary ways to explore a different side of this Maltese gem.

1. Step into Valletta’s Creative Heart: St. James Cavalier Centre for Creativity

Tucked into a centuries-old Inquisitor’s Palace, the St. James Cavalier Centre for Creativity is a vibrant hub of contemporary art, culture, and community. Originally built in the 16th century, this striking white fortress was once a prison and a site of secret executions. Today, it’s transformed into a lively arts venue, hosting exhibitions, street food festivals, and live performances. Wander through its hidden courtyards and sun-dappled archways, where the past and present collide. It’s a must-visit for artists, history buffs, and anyone craving Valletta’s modern soul.

2. Unearth History Beneath Your Feet: Valletta Underground Tour

Did you know Valletta is built atop a network of ancient tunnels and hidden chambers? The Mysterious Valletta Tour offers a fascinating journey into the city’s subterranean secrets. Follow your guide through forgotten catacombs, medieval wine cellars, and wartime bunkers, learning how these underground spaces shaped Malta’s history. It’s a cool (literally) alternative to the city’s sunlit streets—and perfect for curious minds.

3. Savour the Quiet: Lower Barrakka Gardens

While the Upper Barrakka Gardens are a beloved panoramic spot, the Lower Barrakka Gardens offer a quieter, more intimate view of the Grand Harbour. Less crowded and steeped in history, these gardens were once a secret meeting place for merchants and dignitaries. Stroll through the lush, sunlit pathways, enjoy the distant lapping of waves, and snap a photo without the backdrop of crowds.

4. Explore Dark History: The Inquisitor’s Palace

For a gripping dive into Malta’s religious and legal past, the Inquisitor’s Palace is a hauntingly fascinating stop. This 16th-century fortress served as the seat of the Catholic Inquisition in Malta, and its eerie cells and torture chambers provide a sobering glimpse into a turbulent era. While it’s a bit off the typical tourist circuit, the exhibits and guided tours offer rich storytelling and a chance to reflect on Malta’s complex history.

5. Wander Local Lanes: Strada San Domenico and Triq l-Antika

Swap the well-trodden Royal Road for a meander through Strada San Domenico, a charming artisans’ street filled with workshops for glassblowers, weavers, and chocolate makers. Nearby, Triq l-Antika (Antique Street) is a narrow lane bursting with tiny shops selling Maltese lace, handmade soaps, and vintage souvenirs. For lunch, duck into a family-run café like Café Rui or Café del Sol and savour pastizzi (Maltese pastries) and strong Malta coffee, just like the locals do.

Conclusion: Valletta’s Delightful Detours

Valletta thrives on balance—its grandeur and its intimacy, its history and its innovation. By venturing beyond the well-known landmarks, you’ll uncover a city that’s rich in culture, stories, and small-town charm. Whether you’re exploring hidden gardens, sipping coffee in artisan lanes, or descending into ancient tunnels, Valletta’s road less travelled promises unforgettable memories. So next time you’re in Malta’s capital, let curiosity lead the way.

Ready to explore Valletta’s hidden side? Pack your walking shoes and an adventurous spirit—there’s more to discover than meets the eye!

“Echoes From The Past”, the past doesn’t necessarily stay there


What happens when your past finally catches up with you?

…

Christmas is just around the corner, a time to be with family. For Will Mason, an orphan since he was fourteen, it is a time for reflection on what his life could have been, and what it could be.

Until a chance encounter brings back to life the reasons for his twenty years of self-imposed exile from a life only normal people could have. From that moment Will’s life slowly starts to unravel and it’s obvious to him it’s time to move on.

This time, however, there is more at stake.

Will has broken his number one rule, don’t get involved.

With his nemesis, Eddie Jamieson, suddenly within reach, and a blossoming relationship with an office colleague, Maria, about to change everything, Will has to make a choice. Quietly leave, or finally, make a stand.

But as Will soon discovers, when other people are involved there is going to be terrible consequences no matter what choice he makes.

https://amzn.to/2CYKxu4

newechocover5rs

Writing a book in 365 days – 346

Day 346

How to Keep Your Writing Fresh – Ditch the Clichés (and Use a Few Sparingly, If You Must)

Introduction

We’ve all been there: you sit down to write a blog, a sales email, or a novel chapter, and before you know it your prose is peppered with phrases like “think outside the box,” “at the end of the day,” or “the sky’s the limit.” Clichés feel safe because they’re familiar, but they also signal lazy thinking, dilute your voice, and can even turn readers off.

So how do you keep your writing crisp, original, and engaging? And if a cliché is the perfect punchline for a specific moment, how can you wield it without sounding trite? Below is a practical, step‑by‑step guide to help you banish the overused and, when necessary, deploy a cliché with surgical precision.

1. Know What a Cliché Actually Is

DefinitionWhy It’s Problematic
A phrase, idea, or trope that has been overused to the point of losing its original impact.It signals a lack of original thought, can feel generic, and often triggers “mental fatigue” in readers.

Key takeaway: Not every familiar phrase is a cliché. Idioms (“break a leg”) and widely accepted terminology (“search engine optimization”) are fine when they serve a clear purpose.

2. Identify the Clichés in Your Own Writing

  1. Read Aloud – Hearing the words forces you to notice rhythm and repetition.
  2. Highlight “Red Flags” – Words like obviously, basically, in today’s fast‑paced world, think outside the box, win-win.
  3. Use a Cliché Detector
    • Online tools (e.g., Cliché Finder or ProWritingAid).
    • Browser extensions that underline overused phrases in real time.

Pro tip: Keep a personal “cliché cheat sheet.” Whenever you catch yourself reaching for a tired phrase, jot it down and replace it later.

3. Replace, Not Remove – Strategies for Fresh Alternatives

ClichéWhy It’s OverusedFresh Alternative
“Think outside the box”Corporate buzzword“Explore unconventional angles”
“At the end of the day”Conversational filler“Ultimately” or “When all is said and done”
“The sky’s the limit”Over‑optimistic hype“The possibilities are endless”
“In today’s fast‑paced world”Generic time‑setter“In an era of rapid change”

How to Generate Alternatives:

  • Ask “Why?” – What’s the core idea? Answer that directly.
  • Swap nouns and verbs – Replace box with a concrete image relevant to your niche.
  • Use vivid sensory language – “The horizon expands before us” feels more poetic than “the sky’s the limit.”

4. Embrace Specificity Over Generality

Bad: “She was very happy.”
Good: “She beamed, her eyes sparkling like sunrise on the lake.”

Specific details make the scene vivid, leaving no room for lazy shorthand.

5. When a Cliché Is the Perfect Fit – Use It Sparingly & Strategically

Sometimes a cliché can act as an anchor—a shared cultural reference that instantly connects you with readers. If you decide to keep one, follow these guidelines:

5.1. Make It Contextual

  • Tie it to your unique narrative.
    • Example: Instead of the generic “It’s a win‑win situation,” write, “Our partnership is a win‑win: you get a 20 % discount, and we gain a long‑term client who loves our eco‑friendly packaging.”

5.2. Add a Twist

  • Subvert expectations.
    • Example: “We told the team to think outside the box—but first, we built a bigger box.”
    • This acknowledges the cliché, then flips it, showing cleverness.

5.3. Pair It With Strong Imagery

  • Bolster the cliché with fresh description.
    • Example: “At the end of the day, the city lights flickered like fireflies caught in a jar, reminding us that even the busiest streets need moments of calm.”

5.4. Limit Frequency

  • One per paragraph, maximum two per piece.
    • This keeps the impact high without overwhelming the reader.

6. Practice Exercise: Rewrite the Cliché‑Heavy Paragraph

Original (cliché‑laden):

“In today’s fast‑paced world, businesses need to think outside the box if they want to stay ahead. At the end of the day, it’s all about delivering value and creating win‑win solutions for customers and shareholders alike.”

Revised (cliché‑free):

“In an era of rapid change, companies must explore unconventional strategies to maintain a competitive edge. Ultimately, success hinges on delivering genuine value and forging mutually beneficial relationships with both customers and investors.”

What Changed?

  • Replaced “fast‑paced world” with “era of rapid change.”
  • Swapped “think outside the box” for “explore unconventional strategies.”
  • Substituted “at the end of the day” with “ultimately.”
  • Turned “win‑win solutions” into “mutually beneficial relationships.”

7. Checklist Before Publishing

  •  Did I scan for common clichés?
  •  Have I replaced every red‑flag phrase with a specific, vivid alternative?
  •  If a cliché remains, does it serve a strategic purpose?
  •  Have I added a twist or unique imagery to that cliché?
  •  Is the overall tone consistent with my brand voice?

Conclusion

Clichés are the linguistic equivalent of fast food: instantly satisfying but nutritionally lacking. By actively identifying, replacing, and only strategically preserving a few, you’ll elevate your writing from “just okay” to “memorable.”

Remember: your words are a reflection of your thought process. The more original they are, the more credibility you earn with every sentence. So next time you feel the urge to lean on a tired phrase, pause, dig deeper, and craft something that truly belongs to you—cliché or not.

Happy writing!

Feel free to share your favourite “cliché‑with‑a‑twist” in the comments below.

An excerpt from “What Sets Us Apart”, a mystery with a twist

See the excerpt from the story below, just a taste of what’s in store…

http://amzn.to/2Eryfth

whatsetscover

McCallister was old school, a man who would most likely fit in perfectly campaigning on the battlefields of Europe during the Second World War. He’d been like a fish out of water in the army, post-Falklands, and while he retired a hero, he still felt he’d more to give.

He’d applied and was accepted as head of a SWAT team, and, watching him now as he and his men disembarked from the truck in almost military precision, a look passed between Annette, the police liaison officer, and I that said she’d seen it all before. I know I had.

There was a one in four chance his team would be selected for this operation, and she had been hoping it would be one of the other three. While waiting for them to arrive she filled me in on the various teams. His was the least co-operative, and the more likely to make ad-hoc decisions rather than adhere to the plan, or any orders that may come from the officer in charge.

This, she said quite bluntly, was going to end badly.

I still had no idea why Prendergast instructed me to attend the scene of what looked to be a normal domestic operation, but as the nominated expert in the field in these types of situations, it was fairly clear he wasn’t taking any chances. It was always a matter of opinion between us, and generally I lost.

In this case, it was an anonymous report identifying what the authorities believed were explosives in one of the dockside sheds where explosives were not supposed to be.

The only reason why the report was given any credence was the man, while not identifying himself by name, said he’d been an explosive expert once and recognized the boxes. That could mean anything, but the Chief Constable was a cautious man.

With his men settled and preparing their weapons, McCallister came over to the command post, not much more than the SUV my liaison and I arrived in, with weapons, bulletproof vests, and rolls of tape to cordon off the area afterward. We both had coffee, steaming in the cold early morning air. Dawn was slowly approaching and although rain had been forecast it had yet to arrive.

A man by the name of Benson was in charge. He too had groaned when he saw McCallister.

“A fine morning for it.” McCallister was the only enthusiastic one here.

He didn’t say what ‘it’ was, but I thought it might eventually be mayhem.

“Let’s hope the rain stays away. It’s going to be difficult enough without it,” Benson said, rubbing his hands together. We had been waiting for the SWAT team to arrive, and another team to take up their position under the wharf, and who was in the final stages of securing their position.

While we were waiting we drew up the plan. I’d go in first to check on what we were dealing with, and what type of explosives. The SWAT team, in the meantime, were to ensure all the exits to the shed were covered. When I gave the signal, they were to enter and secure the building. We were not expecting anyone inside or out, and no movement had been detected in the last hour since our arrival and deployment.

“What’s the current situation?”

“I’ve got eyes on the building, and a team coming in from the waterside, underneath. Its slow progress, but they’re nearly there. Once they’re in place, we’re sending McKenzie in.”

He looked in my direction.

“With due respect sir, shouldn’t it be one of us?” McCallister glared at me with the contempt that only a decorated military officer could.

“No. I have orders from above, much higher than I care to argue with, so, McCallister, no gung-ho heroics for the moment. Just be ready to move on my command, and make sure you have three teams at the exit points, ready to secure the building.”

McCallister opened his mouth, no doubt to question those orders, but instead closed it again. “Yes sir,” he muttered and turned away heading back to his men.

“You’re not going to have much time before he storms the battlements,” Benson quietly said to me, a hint of exasperation in his tone. “I’m dreading the paperwork.”

It was exactly what my liaison officer said when she saw McCallister arriving.

The water team sent their ‘in position’ signal, and we were ready to go.

In the hour or so we’d been on site nothing had stirred, no arrivals, no departures, and no sign anyone was inside, but that didn’t mean we were alone. Nor did it mean I was going to walk in and see immediately what was going on. If it was a cache of explosives then it was possible the building was booby-trapped in any number of ways, there could be sentries or guards, and they had eyes on us, or it might be a false alarm.

I was hoping for the latter.

I put on the bulletproof vest, thinking it was a poor substitute for full battle armor against an exploding bomb, but we were still treating this as a ‘suspected’ case. I noticed my liaison officer was pulling on her bulletproof vest too.

“You don’t have to go. This is my party, not yours,” I said.

“The Chief Constable told me to stick to you like glue, sir.”

I looked at Benson. “Talk some sense into her please, this is not a kindergarten outing.”

He shrugged. Seeing McCallister had taken all the fight out of him. “Orders are orders. If that’s what the Chief Constable requested …”

Madness. I glared at her, and she gave me a wan smile. “Stay behind me then, and don’t do anything stupid.”

“Believe me, I won’t be.” She pulled out and checked her weapon, chambering the first round. It made a reassuring sound.

Suited up, weapons readied, a last sip of the coffee in a stomach that was already churning from nerves and tension, I looked at the target, one hundred yards distant and thought it was going to be the longest hundred yards I’d ever traversed. At least for this week.

A swirling mist rolled in and caused a slight change in plans.

Because the front of the buildings was constantly illuminated by large overhead arc lamps, my intention had been to approach the building from the rear where there was less light and more cover. Despite the lack of movement, if there were explosives in that building, there’d be ‘enemy’ surveillance somewhere, and, after making that assumption, I believed it was going to be easier and less noticeable to use the darkness as a cover.

It was a result of the consultation, and studying the plans of the warehouse, plans that showed three entrances, the main front hangar type doors, a side entrance for truck entry and exit and a small door in the rear, at the end of an internal passage leading to several offices. I also assumed it was the exit used when smokers needed a break. Our entry would be by the rear door or failing that, the side entrance where a door was built into the larger sliding doors. In both cases, the locks would not present a problem.

The change in the weather made the approach shorter, and given the density of the mist now turning into a fog, we were able to approach by the front, hugging the walls, and moving quickly while there was cover. I could feel the dampness of the mist and shivered more than once.

It was nerves more than the cold.

I could also feel rather than see the presence of Annette behind me, and once felt her breath on my neck when we stopped for a quick reconnaissance.

It was the same for McCallister’s men. I could feel them following us, quickly and quietly, and expected, if I turned around, to see him breathing down my neck too.

It added to the tension.

My plan was still to enter by the back door.

We slipped up the alley between the two sheds to the rear corner and stopped. I heard a noise coming from the rear of the building, and the light tap on the shoulder told me Annette had heard it too. I put my hand up to signal her to wait, and as a swirl of mist rolled in, I slipped around the corner heading towards where I’d last seen the glow of a cigarette.

The mist cleared, and we saw each other at the same time. He was a bearded man in battle fatigues, not the average dockside security guard.

He was quick, but my slight element of surprise was his undoing, and he was down and unconscious in less than a few seconds with barely a sound beyond the body hitting the ground. Zip ties secured his hands and legs, and tape his mouth. Annette joined me a minute after securing him.

A glance at the body then me, “I can see why they, whoever they are, sent you.”

She’d asked who I worked for, and I didn’t answer. It was best she didn’t know.

“Stay behind me,” I said, more urgency in my tone. If there was one, there’d be another.

Luck was with us so far. A man outside smoking meant no booby traps on the back door, and quite possibly there’d be none inside. But it indicated there were more men inside, and if so, it appeared they were very well trained. If that were the case, they would be formidable opponents.

The fear factor increased exponentially.

I slowly opened the door and looked in. A pale light shone from within the warehouse itself, one that was not bright enough to be detected from outside. None of the offices had lights on, so it was possible they were vacant. I realized then they had blacked out the windows. Why hadn’t someone checked this?

Once inside, the door closed behind us, progress was slow and careful. She remained directly behind me, gun ready to shoot anything that moved. I had a momentary thought for McCallister and his men, securing the perimeter.

At the end of the corridor, the extent of the warehouse stretched before us. The pale lighting made it seem like a vast empty cavern, except for a long trestle table along one side, and, behind it, stacks of wooden crates, some opened. It looked like a production line.

To get to the table from where we were was a ten-yard walk in the open. There was no cover. If we stuck to the walls, there was equally no cover and a longer walk.

We needed a distraction.

As if on cue, the two main entrances disintegrated into flying shrapnel accompanied by a deafening explosion that momentarily disoriented both Annette and I. Through the smoke and dust kicked up I saw three men appear from behind the wooden crates, each with what looked like machine guns, spraying bullets in the direction of the incoming SWAT members.

They never had a chance, cut down before they made ten steps into the building.

By the time I’d recovered, my head heavy, eyes watering and ears still ringing, I took several steps towards them, managing to take down two of the gunmen but not the third.

I heard a voice, Annette’s I think, yell out, “Oh, God, he’s got a trigger,” just before another explosion, though all I remember in that split second was a bright flash, the intense heat, something very heavy smashing into my chest knocking the wind out of me, and then the sensation of flying, just before I hit the wall.

I spent four weeks in an induced coma, three months being stitched back together and another six learning to do all those basic actions everyone took for granted. It was twelve months almost to the day when I was released from the hospital, physically, except for a few alterations required after being hit by shrapnel, looking the same as I always had.

But mentally? The document I’d signed on release said it all, ‘not fit for active duty; discharged’.

It was in the name of David Cheney. For all intents and purposes, Alistair McKenzie was killed in that warehouse, and for the first time ever, an agent left the Department, the first to retire alive.

I was not sure I liked the idea of making history.

© Charles Heath 2016-2020

In a word: Happy

“I’m happy to be being here.”

Yes, I actually heard that answer given in a television interview, and thought, at the time, it was a quaint expression.

But in reality, this was a person for whom English was a second language, and that was, quite literally, their translation from their language to English.

Suffice to say, that person was not happy when lost the event she was participating in.

But that particular memory was triggered by another event.

Someone asked me how happy I was.

Happy is another of those words like good, thrown around like a rag doll, used without consequence, or regard for its true meaning.

“After everything that’s happened, you should be the happiest man alive!”

I’m happy.

I should be, to them.

A real friend might also say, “Are you sure, you don’t look happy.”

I hesitate but say, “Sure.  I woke up with a headache,” or some other lame reason.

But, in reality, I’m not ‘happy’.  Convention says that we should be happy if everything is going well.  In my case, it is, to a certain extent, but it is what’s happening within that’s the problem.  We say it because people expect it.

I find there is no use complaining because no one will listen, and definitely, no one likes serial complainers.

True.

But somewhere in all those complaints will be the truth, the one item that is bugging us.

It is a case of whether we are prepared to listen.  Really listen.

And not necessarily take people at their word.