Tag: suspense

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 14

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

Going back and forth, fixing the timeline

…

That’s what editing is all about.

Reading that first rough draft and deciding it’s all crap. Then, after a good night’s sleep, deciding that it’s not half bad, just need to weed out the crap.

I’ve decided to add some more after the agent and target are gunned down and our protagonist shoots the sniper. One of them at least. There’s another out there, waiting.

There’s more to the target’s story that wasn’t conveyed to the planners and comes to light in that apartment. There’s going to be a twist in that tale.

The funeral is interesting, not only for the aftermath, but who attends, and as it is for the mentor, our protagonist is there to see what shakes out of the trees.

Meanwhile, our planner is now being interrogated as if she were a foreign spy, the last thing she expected from her own organisation.

I always wanted to see the planets – Episode 26

Where the hell are we?

…

When I opened my eyes, there was a moment where I felt I was rising up from the bottom of the ocean, holding my breath, and heading towards the light.

I was in the captain’s seat, and as my vision focussed, I sucked in a huge breath and sat up. There were others in front of me still slumped over their consoles, barely visible in the emergency lighting.

I tried standing intending to go over to the navigation console and felt my legs buckling under me, and had to sit down again.

I heard a groan from behind me, followed by, “What happened?”

It was the Chief Engineer.

I turned just as he attempted to stand and collapsed to the floor.

I tried again, with more success, and walked slowly over to him. That was when a different sort of light illuminated the bridge and, when I turned to see what it was, just saw the edge of a planet come into view.

We were very close, and it seemed the ship had adopted a circumnavigation path. The ship also seemed to be slowly rotating, hence the changing view of the planet.

Others were stirring. I helped the Chief Engineer up.

“Whatever happened,” I said, “we seemed to have traveled to an as-yet-unnamed planet.”

“Mars perhaps?” He sat back at his console.

A voice yelled out, “not Mars sir, Uranus. And in the distance, that reddish-colored moon is Oberon I think.”

Exactly where the alien ship had said there was a colony, under the ice surface.

I turned to the Engineer, “Chief, what’s the state of the ship?”

“It apparently is on standby, awaiting our command. It is as the Navigator says, we are at Uranus, in a geosynchronous orbit.”

The moon that we believed to be Oberon came up on the screen, and standing off it was three ships, the two that we had encountered, and a larger ship, no doubt belonging to the kidnappers.

“Do you have the elapsed time since we started the test?” I was curious how long we had been unconscious.

I would also like to know why were ended up unconscious, but that was a matter for later. The other problem; the three ships would soon discover our arrival and would be curious themselves, and I didn’t like the odds if we had to go into battle.

“Sixty-five earth minutes, sir.”

I’m sure he would tell me just how fast we had traveled soon enough. “I’ve got to get back down to engineering. I’ll have a report as soon as possible, but, if required, we’re on standby for any operation you deem necessary.”

“Very good.” Then, “Any chance we arrived un-noticed?” I asked the navigator.

“No sir. We were just scanned, so they know something is out there.”

I found it surprising that the kidnappers had told me precisely where they were going. Perhaps they had not expected our ship could follow them, and that, until just over an hour ago, was exactly our thoughts too.

“Is it possible to scan the moon, and the planet?”

“In the process of doing so, sir.”

I went over to the military console where the officer was quickly checking all the systems. “Everything online and available?”

“As far as I can tell. We should be able to retaliate if we have to.”

“It may be sooner than we think. One of the ships, a smaller one, is heading in this direction.”

I yelled out, “Anyone needing medical assistance?”

No one replied. It seems they had all suffered the same malaise I had, a period of unconsciousness. Then a series of reports filled the bridge as each officer reported their systems were online and ready.

I then asked the ship’s department heads to report in, and each came back, not asking the obvious question, but to say everything, and everyone, was ok.

Five minutes later, the ship could be seen approaching us, stopping in indeterminable distance from us, but it was quite close, close enough to make out the detail of the outer hull, and, I noticed, for one of the scientists to scan the vessel and take photographs for reference if we needed to know about it later. The first alien ship in our database.

Then a voice came over the communications system, not one of ours. “Hailing earth ship’s captain. We are sending one of your crew back to you, we do not know what is wrong with him.”

The next instant the captain, in a prone poisition, appeared on the deck in front of the chair. “Medical team to the bridge,” I said.

I went over to him, and he appeared asleep. I checked for a pulse, and there wasn’t one. He was cold, and not a good sign.”

“We have him,” I said. “What happened?”

“He collapsed. Our medical people tell me from what they know of your physiology, that he has stopped breathing, and possibly had what you call a heart attack. I assure you we did not harm him, or your other crew member in any way.”

One of the ship’s doctors came out of the elevator and ran over to us, and immediately did a scan. We were the first ship, the first people, in fact, to use the new technology which was supposed to diagnose most of the problems humans could suffer in a matter of minutes.

“He’s dead, sir,” the doctor pronounced. He had brought several others on the medical team, along with the means to transport him back to the hospital.

They carefully lifted the captain onto the mobile stretcher. “Permission to leave, sir?”

I nodded.

The alien captain, if it was him, came back, “We would like to know how your ship managed to get here so quickly. Our knowledge of your technology makes it impossible for you to travel such distances as you have, and especially in that ship.”

“We’re trying to work that out ourselves. Would you like to tell us how you can move so quickly yourself?”

“We have nothing to hide. Perhaps we could meet and discuss it.”

…

© Charles Heath 2021

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 13

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

It depends on your definition of guilty

…

From the aspect of the poor agent who walked into a maelstrom, it has to be the planners, or at the very least someone within the organisation.

Leaks are rarely considered to be from the outside.

But, it could be someone on the inside trusting the wrong person. It’s a matter that will merit more investigation, after …

Well, there are those on the inside who believe that it was the planners, and one in particular, Evelyn.

While the protagonist also believes this is the case, and despite her protestations, because of the unique relationship between them, it is about to land her in a world of pain.

Meanwhile, the protagonist has a funeral to attend.

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 13

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

It depends on your definition of guilty

…

From the aspect of the poor agent who walked into a maelstrom, it has to be the planners, or at the very least someone within the organisation.

Leaks are rarely considered to be from the outside.

But, it could be someone on the inside trusting the wrong person. It’s a matter that will merit more investigation, after …

Well, there are those on the inside who believe that it was the planners, and one in particular, Evelyn.

While the protagonist also believes this is the case, and despite her protestations, because of the unique relationship between them, it is about to land her in a world of pain.

Meanwhile, the protagonist has a funeral to attend.

I always wanted to see the planets – Episode 25

Are we there yet?

…

Even being in the fastest ship we had in the fleet, it still felt like it would take a lifetime to catch up to the alien ship, and I had to wonder at the pioneers of space travel who had to hibernate for the better part of a year, and sometimes a lot longer, to get to the other planets.

For us, time versus distance was measured a lot less that it used to be, but it would still take a long time, and we were prepared for it. What the real problem was, how long it would take us to be in a position to rescue our crew members.

Or how they felt being prisoners on an alien space craft, and how they were being treated, or even whether the aliens were either willing or capable of looking after them.

It was going to be a very interesting conversation I would have with the captain if or when we finally found them.

But knowing we might be in a fruitless chase to rescue our crew members just added to the frustration. I divided my time between the day room and pacing the bridge, looking out into the inky blackness, at times wishing something, anything, would appear to break the monotony

The science department on the other hand had a plethora of data, and no shortage of theories, but little concrete evidence of what they were calling space corridors, which were much like elevators only horizontal.

Chalmers still stuck to his belief in what he called worm hole, but was unable to advance a theory of whether the pre existed, or whether the alien ships created them as a means if getting quickly from one part if the universe to the other.

My report to the Admiral was scant on facts, except for one, that we were not alone in the universe. It Waldo precipitated a meeting of the brightest scientific minds back on the planet on the subject of alien life, and the universe itself.

At least some people were happy.

Meanwhile, the question of the ship’s speed became another topic, and it was being suggested that with a little tinkering, we could push more out of the propulsion unit, ‘tinkering’ being the operative word.

The subject was quite technical and although I had some knowledge of the mechanics, it was not enough, and I felt a little out of my depth when included in the discussions, relying heavily on the expertise of the Chief Engineer and his staff.

It was quite daunting that they were mentioning speeds up to the speed of light, now that they knew the structural integrity of the ship was not affected by the higher speed. I was not aware that it could have been a factor, but then I hadn’t known the ship was made out of an alloy that some said came from alien technology found on our planet.

Like most I believed the story that the compound that enabled us to get onto space was a freak discovery, even despite the rumours. Now, within the confines of a select group on board the ship and back at space command, those rumours had become a reality.

It was a lot to take in and I had to wonder how much the previous captain knew, and whether he was ever going to tell me. Sometimes ignorance was bliss, or so the saying went.

We’d been hurtling through space for three days when the Chief Engineer called me. I was in the day room reading up on the protocols we were supposed to adopt if or when we met new entities, and at a point where I couldn’t believe some of what I was reading.

“Sir, we think we might be able the squeeze a little more out of the engines.”

I wondered how much that little more was.

“How so?”

“The technical explanation would probably take a week, but with a few adjustments we might get a hundred percent improvement.”

“Risk factor?”

“Nothing comes without a risk, sir, but more or less as it was explained at the last conference “

In other words, any risk was worth it.

“The downside being we could be stuck in space until someone could come and rescue us.”

“Provided life support remains up and running, yes. But I believe the risk is minimal. We all signed up knowing that in all likelihood it might be a one way trip.”

Stating the obvious didn’t make the decision Amy easier. That responsibility for over 2,000 others on board weighed heavily.

“OK. I’ll make an announcement to the crew. Be on the bridge in fifteen minutes.”

“Aye, sir.”

Fifteen minutes precisely, we were looking out into the inky blackness, everyone battened down. For the first time, I sat in the captains chair with the feeling that I should be there rather than just keeping the seat warm for when the real captain returned.

A strange phrase came into my head, just seconds before I gave the order, death or glory.

“Helmsman?”

He turned. “Sir?”

“Let’s go.”

…

© Charles Heath 2021

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 12

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

Searching for who is guilty

…

And, while that sounds like it might be easy … just look at those who are accusing you of being the one who messed up …. Clearly it must go back to those who planned the operation, and the intelligence, or lack of it, behind it.

But here’s the rub, you can’t have a relationship with one of the researchers, and then start blaming the back-room personnel.

Especially when they’re adamant they’re not to blame, and indignant you would accuse them.

And equally indignant if they had something to hide, which our researcher does.

So what does our illustrious ex-agent decide to do?

Investigate.

But, first, he has to go home and complain to his father, a man in a rather unique position, and, now, new plot line, the sort of man who can offer help – not the sort that is the pat on the back, and you’ll get to the bottom of it help – but a few interesting people with ‘talents and skills’.

I hesitate to use the word thug, it sounds so, well, thuggish!

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 12

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

Searching for who is guilty

…

And, while that sounds like it might be easy … just look at those who are accusing you of being the one who messed up …. Clearly it must go back to those who planned the operation, and the intelligence, or lack of it, behind it.

But here’s the rub, you can’t have a relationship with one of the researchers, and then start blaming the back-room personnel.

Especially when they’re adamant they’re not to blame, and indignant you would accuse them.

And equally indignant if they had something to hide, which our researcher does.

So what does our illustrious ex-agent decide to do?

Investigate.

But, first, he has to go home and complain to his father, a man in a rather unique position, and, now, new plot line, the sort of man who can offer help – not the sort that is the pat on the back, and you’ll get to the bottom of it help – but a few interesting people with ‘talents and skills’.

I hesitate to use the word thug, it sounds so, well, thuggish!

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 11

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

Continuing on from yesterday…

…

The mentor is dead, the asset in the field is presumed dead, the agent sent in as backup has been shot at, shot up, and grazed, his baptism under fire.

Now he had to go back home and face the music. That music, of course, is the debriefing, a chore that can take many forms depending on what the interrogators are after.

But analysing the operation through each of the events causes our new agent to question what really happened because things just don’t add up. The line of questioning…

Well, that’s going to be a new part of the story, which feeds into later chapters.

Of course, debriefings are really another name for labelling blame, and you guessed it, who’s the sitting suck?

So much for the budding career in intelligence.

Searching for locations: Queenstown Gardens, Queenstown, New Zealand

Queenstown Gardens are not far from the center of Queenstown.  They are just down the hill from where we usually stay at Queenstown Mews.

More often than not we approach the Gardens from the lakeside during our morning walk from the apartment to the coffee shop.  You can walk alongside the lake, or walk through the Gardens, which, whether in summer or winter, is a very picturesque walk.

There’s a bowling club, and I’m afraid I will never be that sort of person to take it up (not enough patience) and an Ice Arena, where, in winter I have heard players practicing ice hockey.

I’m sure, at times, ice skating can also be done.

There is a stone bridge to walk across, and in Autumn/Winter the trees can add a splash of color.

There is a large water feature with fountain, and plenty of seating around the edge of the lake, to sit and absorb the tranquility, or to have a picnic.

There are ducks in the pond

and out of the pond

and plenty of grassed areas with flower beds which are more colorful in summer.  I have also seen the lawns covered in snow, and the fir trees that line the lake side of the gardens hang heavy with icicles.

“The Enemy Within” – a thirty-day revision – Day 11

This book has also been written for some time, like The Document, and the manuscript was also sitting in a box with half a dozen others gathering dust and not quite as complete, so this month it is going to get the makeover, a first draft for the editor.

And so it begins…

…

Continuing on from yesterday…

…

The mentor is dead, the asset in the field is presumed dead, the agent sent in as backup has been shot at, shot up, and grazed, his baptism under fire.

Now he had to go back home and face the music. That music, of course, is the debriefing, a chore that can take many forms depending on what the interrogators are after.

But analysing the operation through each of the events causes our new agent to question what really happened because things just don’t add up. The line of questioning…

Well, that’s going to be a new part of the story, which feeds into later chapters.

Of course, debriefings are really another name for labelling blame, and you guessed it, who’s the sitting suck?

So much for the budding career in intelligence.