Tag: Fiction

A Score to Settle – The Editors Draft – Day 1

I have the story, the editor is asking for it, and I’m putting the final touches to it

…

Or so it seems, but nothing is ever in concrete when working on a story. My first thoughts were, what led up to the start of the story, a veritable getting back in the saddle after the metaphorical horse has tossed you off with life-threatening injuries.

That’s basically the first chapter, or it might finish up as a prologue. There are arguments for and against prologues, so perhaps as the month and the story progresses, it might become clearer what is needed.

So, where are we?

Somewhere in Africa, a country that is run by the military with a so-called puppet president. A country that is ripe for revolution, where the people are plotting to take their country back.

With help, but just whose help is nebulous.

In the meantime, there’s a human rights conference about to happen, a rather ironic event in a country supposedly at the forefront of perpetrating such offences.

Why is our fractured main character there? To protect one of the keynote speakers and convenors of the conference, supposedly without her knowledge, but of course, secrets are only secrets if they remain so.

And with governments involved, nothing remains secret for long.

That’s the premise so far.

Today is much about fine-tuning the background of the main character, and what came before.

…

Today’s word count: 2,174 words, the same for the running total.

A Score to Settle – The Editors Draft – Day 1

I have the story, the editor is asking for it, and I’m putting the final touches to it

…

Or so it seems, but nothing is ever in concrete when working on a story. My first thoughts were, what led up to the start of the story, a veritable getting back in the saddle after the metaphorical horse has tossed you off with life-threatening injuries.

That’s basically the first chapter, or it might finish up as a prologue. There are arguments for and against prologues, so perhaps as the month and the story progresses, it might become clearer what is needed.

So, where are we?

Somewhere in Africa, a country that is run by the military with a so-called puppet president. A country that is ripe for revolution, where the people are plotting to take their country back.

With help, but just whose help is nebulous.

In the meantime, there’s a human rights conference about to happen, a rather ironic event in a country supposedly at the forefront of perpetrating such offences.

Why is our fractured main character there? To protect one of the keynote speakers and convenors of the conference, supposedly without her knowledge, but of course, secrets are only secrets if they remain so.

And with governments involved, nothing remains secret for long.

That’s the premise so far.

Today is much about fine-tuning the background of the main character, and what came before.

…

Today’s word count: 2,174 words, the same for the running total.

First Dig Two Graves – The final draft – Day 30

Here’s the thing.

Ever had an itch you can’t scratch; that’s a part of what you’ve written, you have reservations, and you’re not sure what to write in its place.

For a few days now the start, or maybe the end, has been swirling around in my head.  To be honest, I don’t like the start, and I can’t get a feel for it.  I have about five different starting points, but none of them feels right.

I’ve been thinking of writing it from John’s perspective, but there are so many peripheral characters that need to be drawn in, people he doesn’t really know much about, or some who have a vested interest in his current girlfriend if she could be called that.

So I thought I’d throw a few words down and see how they sit:

…

You would not know by looking at MaryAnne that she was probably one of the best assassins in the world.  You would be more inclined to consider she was just another spoilt American brat on the loose on holiday.

She was certainly one of the most beautiful women I’d ever met.

And she was certainly one of the most deadly.  I could personally attest to that having seen her in action.

I could also attest to the fact that somewhere under that hard, conscienceless exterior, there was a heart, and sometimes it was visible.  After all, I was a target, her target, once, and I’m still alive thanks to her.

It was a small detail I omitted when I introduced her to my parents, but that was one little step on a long road that I thought was going somewhere.

Perhaps, after all this time, I’d misinterpreted the signs and I was wrong.

We were sitting on the balcony of our hotel room on the 45th floor of the hotel we were staying at in downtown Surfer’s Paradise, a mecca for holidaymakers from the rest of Australia, and overseas.

It was perfect for tourists.

The champagne was cold, and although it was a hot 35 degrees Celcius out in the sunlight, the mood on the balcony was as decidedly cool as the champagne.

Today was the six-month anniversary of the first day we had spent together as, well, I was not sure, now, what we were.

She turned to look at me.  She was nothing like the Zoe of old, and I had finally gotten used to Mary Anne.  It was an amazing transformation, but with it, I had thought she had finally shrugged off the Zoe persona.

She hadn’t.  That hardened expression that I had hoped would be gone forever, had returned.

“It’s time to go back home, John.”

It was also that tone, the one when she spoke, that sent shivers down my spine, not the good shivers, but the one that told me trouble was ahead.  Deadly trouble.

“I need to do something.  Don’t get me wrong, this had been a delightful rest, and I could not ask for a better companion, but it was time.  We both knew this was going to happen.”

I noticed her features had softened a little when she mentioned my name, but the message was the same.  We had talked about this moment at the outset.  There was always going to be a use-by date on this adventure, for me at least.

It was also the time when she would, she said, decide where I would fit, if I fitted, in her future.  When we originally spoke about it, she was still unsure of her feelings towards me.  Over time, I had also hoped that they would be the same as mine for her.

Perhaps I had been expecting too much.

“When did you decide?”

“About thirty seconds ago.  That’s when I realized it doesn’t matter where we are in the world, I still want to be with you.  So, how do you like the idea of going into the assassination business?”

I’m not sure what John might think of this development, but I think you will agree with me, so long as he is with Zoe, he’s happy.

…

© Copyright, Charles Heath 2018-2023

First Dig Two Graves – The final draft – Day 30

Here’s the thing.

Ever had an itch you can’t scratch; that’s a part of what you’ve written, you have reservations, and you’re not sure what to write in its place.

For a few days now the start, or maybe the end, has been swirling around in my head.  To be honest, I don’t like the start, and I can’t get a feel for it.  I have about five different starting points, but none of them feels right.

I’ve been thinking of writing it from John’s perspective, but there are so many peripheral characters that need to be drawn in, people he doesn’t really know much about, or some who have a vested interest in his current girlfriend if she could be called that.

So I thought I’d throw a few words down and see how they sit:

…

You would not know by looking at MaryAnne that she was probably one of the best assassins in the world.  You would be more inclined to consider she was just another spoilt American brat on the loose on holiday.

She was certainly one of the most beautiful women I’d ever met.

And she was certainly one of the most deadly.  I could personally attest to that having seen her in action.

I could also attest to the fact that somewhere under that hard, conscienceless exterior, there was a heart, and sometimes it was visible.  After all, I was a target, her target, once, and I’m still alive thanks to her.

It was a small detail I omitted when I introduced her to my parents, but that was one little step on a long road that I thought was going somewhere.

Perhaps, after all this time, I’d misinterpreted the signs and I was wrong.

We were sitting on the balcony of our hotel room on the 45th floor of the hotel we were staying at in downtown Surfer’s Paradise, a mecca for holidaymakers from the rest of Australia, and overseas.

It was perfect for tourists.

The champagne was cold, and although it was a hot 35 degrees Celcius out in the sunlight, the mood on the balcony was as decidedly cool as the champagne.

Today was the six-month anniversary of the first day we had spent together as, well, I was not sure, now, what we were.

She turned to look at me.  She was nothing like the Zoe of old, and I had finally gotten used to Mary Anne.  It was an amazing transformation, but with it, I had thought she had finally shrugged off the Zoe persona.

She hadn’t.  That hardened expression that I had hoped would be gone forever, had returned.

“It’s time to go back home, John.”

It was also that tone, the one when she spoke, that sent shivers down my spine, not the good shivers, but the one that told me trouble was ahead.  Deadly trouble.

“I need to do something.  Don’t get me wrong, this had been a delightful rest, and I could not ask for a better companion, but it was time.  We both knew this was going to happen.”

I noticed her features had softened a little when she mentioned my name, but the message was the same.  We had talked about this moment at the outset.  There was always going to be a use-by date on this adventure, for me at least.

It was also the time when she would, she said, decide where I would fit, if I fitted, in her future.  When we originally spoke about it, she was still unsure of her feelings towards me.  Over time, I had also hoped that they would be the same as mine for her.

Perhaps I had been expecting too much.

“When did you decide?”

“About thirty seconds ago.  That’s when I realized it doesn’t matter where we are in the world, I still want to be with you.  So, how do you like the idea of going into the assassination business?”

I’m not sure what John might think of this development, but I think you will agree with me, so long as he is with Zoe, he’s happy.

…

© Copyright, Charles Heath 2018-2023

First Dig Two Graves – The Final Draft – Day 27

The second Zoe thriller.

…

It’s the final battle.

Never trust anyone else to do the job you should have done yourself in the first place.

It’s an interesting premise, but somehow encapsulates the ethos of this story.

Who is Romanov?  Zoe, Irina, whatever you want to call her, he’s her father.

But…

The notion that anonymously putting out a finder’s fee on his daughter’s head, coupled with the ire of Olga over the death of her son, sent everyone from the Minister in the Kremlin down into a tailspin.

The first effort, had the kidnappers just followed the rules, would have got an enormous payday, and everything would have been resolved there and then, in Marseilles.

No, people got greedy.

So did all the others, getting wind of what was at stake, enough to retire, or continue to retire in style.

Dominica, Yuri, and even Olga had she been smart.

She was not.

People didn’t have to die.  Zoe could have been spared a killing spree, and John some maybe quality time with Olga.  It’s a mistake Olga won’t make again.

And John, now with a father-in-law, well it’s just another surprise in a long list of surprises.

…

Today’s writing, with everyone, almost, getting their just desserts, 2,111 words, for a total of 65,265.

First Dig Two Graves – The Final Draft – Day 27

The second Zoe thriller.

…

It’s the final battle.

Never trust anyone else to do the job you should have done yourself in the first place.

It’s an interesting premise, but somehow encapsulates the ethos of this story.

Who is Romanov?  Zoe, Irina, whatever you want to call her, he’s her father.

But…

The notion that anonymously putting out a finder’s fee on his daughter’s head, coupled with the ire of Olga over the death of her son, sent everyone from the Minister in the Kremlin down into a tailspin.

The first effort, had the kidnappers just followed the rules, would have got an enormous payday, and everything would have been resolved there and then, in Marseilles.

No, people got greedy.

So did all the others, getting wind of what was at stake, enough to retire, or continue to retire in style.

Dominica, Yuri, and even Olga had she been smart.

She was not.

People didn’t have to die.  Zoe could have been spared a killing spree, and John some maybe quality time with Olga.  It’s a mistake Olga won’t make again.

And John, now with a father-in-law, well it’s just another surprise in a long list of surprises.

…

Today’s writing, with everyone, almost, getting their just desserts, 2,111 words, for a total of 65,265.

In a word: Bar

There’s more than one way … er, perhaps it’s better to say, there are many ways to use the word bar, which is not bad for a three letter word.

 

Bar, the one you associate with drinks, in hotels, restaurants and we’ll, just bars.

Probably the best type of bar you might find me in is a Sports Bar, where you can snack on buffalo wings a tall glass of beer and watch with ice hockey in winter or baseball in summer.

It’s one I use from time to time when asked, what will we do, and the reply is often let’s go to a bar.  The best bars are underground, dark and dingy, full of eclectic people, with a band playing almost passable music or better still jazz

 

Bar, as in the legal variety

There are so many legal references to using bar, that the one that I am most familiar with is being admitted to the bar which means that you can now practice law.

Raising the bar, if that’s possible, where the bar is that imaginary level which offers sinks very low.  When someone says they’re going to try and raise the bar, you may be assured there will be a long battle ahead, simply because people generally find it hard to change.

 

Bar, as in we are not going to let you in here.  Yes, this is the irksome one where you find yourself, often for reasons unknown, barred from somewhere or something.  This may also be referred to by saying everyone may enter bar you.  

 

Bar, as in an iron bar, the sort that is sometimes used as a blunt force object by villains to remind the victim they owe any one of a loan shark, bookie or the mafia.  God help you if it is all three.

There are also iron bars of a different sort, those that are set in concrete outside a window most likely in a prison where the objective is to prevent escape.

It gives rise to an old expression, that person should be behind bars.

 

Then there is just a bar, such as a bar of gold, which I’m sure we’d all like to have stashed away, but not necessarily in the mattress, or the more common variety, a chocolate bar, which I have one now.  What’s your favorite?

 

And just to add to the list of meanings you can always refer to sashes or stripes as bars.

Confused?  Well, there’s still music, and the bane of yachtsmen, sand bars but I think we’ll leave it there.

Welcome to the English language

First Dig Two Graves – The Final Draft – Day 25

The second Zoe thriller.

…

In all of the goings-on, with Zoe chasing down old acquaintances in Bucharest, then moving on to  Yuri, then Olga, we forget that Isobel and Rupert are on her trail, with Sebastian in tow.

It’s not so much Sebastian in charge anymore, not after going rogue and shooting his boss and John’s mother, an act that Rupert witnesses after following Sebastian on the hunch that he was up to something.

Rupert realizes that Worthington still presents a major problem, and on the basis that Worthington was going to realize it’s not Zoe shooting at him, Worthington had to be taken off the chessboard.

Unfortunately, he has to enlist Sebastian to get a crew together to kidnap him and take him to a safe house.

Meanwhile, Isobel, with a computer in hand, takes up vigil at the hospital with John’s mother, pretending she is her daughter.  There she tracks Zoe via her cell phone to an address in Zurich.

Then, miraculously John’s cell phone reappears and is active long enough for her to get a location, and see that a 96-second phone call is made to a phone in Zurich, Zoe’s.

Then it disappears again.

Isobel then calls Zoe and gives her the address.  It’s a short call.

Calls to Sebastian and Rupert mobilize them, and everyone is on their way to John’s location.

…

Today’s writing, with Zoe languishing in a dungeon waiting for a white knight, 2,011 words, for a total of 61,922.

Motive, means, and opportunity – Episode 14

…

Detective Worthey investigates a car crash

…

Detective Worthey had some experience with arguments and death.

It was a simple scenario and it happened more than one thought.  Only recently there had been a case where a husband and wife had an extreme argument, a number of residents in the apartment block attested to it, and to the fact the husband left in a fit of pique, and not thirty minutes later was killed in a car crash caused by his inattentiveness.

For all intents and purposes, it was an open and shut case.

The case notes before him were anything but an open and shut case, even though the investigating detective had considered it so.  On the surface it was.

The son was a recovering drug addict.  His mother refused to accept that the boy was an addict, that he had a problem that could easily be overcome and was being handled.  According to her statement, the son had told her it was not a problem, as it was being made out to be.

The father knew the extent of the problem and had been working with the medical team to look after his son, and the considered opinion of the medical team and the father was for an extra period in rehab.  The problem: the treatment was working but the son was not strictly adhering to the program.

It was that old story, the son didn’t think he had a problem and had fallen off the wagon.

And, of course, the program was not like jail.  The participant was not obligated to stay if they didn’t want to, and the son had considered he was sorted and signed himself out.

Only to go and visit his old friends, and, that mistake made, he was convinced just a little wouldn’t harm him.  Define ‘just a little’.

Another statement had the son returning home, clearly under the influence, and a meltdown ensues.  The wife takes the son’s side, not acknowledging the son was back on drugs, the father tries to convince them that the son needed to return to rehab, and while the parents are fighting, the son takes the car and leaves.

Not twenty minutes later the son was involved in a car accident, failing to stop at a red light, and cleaned up by a car who had a green light.  The son is severely injured, and the car is wrecked.  The other car is also disabled, but the driver just got out and ran.

There were seven witness statements covering the crash and aftermath.

Each was different.

Each said the son’s car ran the red light and the other car had nowhere to go.

Each said the driver of the car that hit the son’s car got out and simply walked away.

Seven descriptions of the fleeing driver were basically the same in that it was a man, he was wearing a dark blue suit, and he had short reddish hair.

That was it.  Two said he was tall, two said her was short, and the rest of average height.

Three said he was a black man, and the others said he was Mexican.

Four said the man stopped to look in the car that he’d hit, saw the driver, and completely changed expression, to one of recognition followed by shock.

The others said he looked in the car, shook his head, and then walked off.  The detectives’ notes said the car was registered to a man named…

Phillip Megarry.

Worthey re-read the paragraph again, and then shook his head.

The report then went on to say that Megarry had been contacted, did not match the description of the man who had ran not the son’s car, and then reported the fact the car was stolen, having not realised that it was not in the garage where it should be.

That man showed the Detective the garage where the car was stored and provided the registration papers for the car.  The Megarry then, was not the Megarry aka Bergman now.

But, that Megarry was short, slight, and spoke with a German accent.  The Bergman Megarry was American with no sign of any accent.

Worthy made a note: Follow up interview with Megarry the owner of the car that hit the son’s car.

But, if the Megarry that did hit the son’s car was the Bergman alias, then the killing of the son was from the very person Wendy was having an affair with, whom she had known for a long time, and was the cause of all Anderson’s problems.

What are the odds of it being such a small world? Worthey asked himself.

This was adding a new level of complication that he was sure none of the family knew about.

The accident wasn’t James Anderson’s fault.  Whether or not he could have prevented his son taking the car, that could also be applicable to the mother.  That accident was always going to happen, one way of another, because the son’s ability to do anything was impaired by drugs.

And Worthey was curious what the mother would say when she learned who it was driving the car that caused the death of her son.  No, that was Bryson’s problem to sort out as the lead detective on the case.

But there was one lingering possibility, had James Anderson known it was his best friend who had virtually killed his son, and did he kill him because of it?

…

© Charles Heath 2019-2023

First Dig Two Graves – The Final Draft – Day 25

The second Zoe thriller.

…

In all of the goings-on, with Zoe chasing down old acquaintances in Bucharest, then moving on to  Yuri, then Olga, we forget that Isobel and Rupert are on her trail, with Sebastian in tow.

It’s not so much Sebastian in charge anymore, not after going rogue and shooting his boss and John’s mother, an act that Rupert witnesses after following Sebastian on the hunch that he was up to something.

Rupert realizes that Worthington still presents a major problem, and on the basis that Worthington was going to realize it’s not Zoe shooting at him, Worthington had to be taken off the chessboard.

Unfortunately, he has to enlist Sebastian to get a crew together to kidnap him and take him to a safe house.

Meanwhile, Isobel, with a computer in hand, takes up vigil at the hospital with John’s mother, pretending she is her daughter.  There she tracks Zoe via her cell phone to an address in Zurich.

Then, miraculously John’s cell phone reappears and is active long enough for her to get a location, and see that a 96-second phone call is made to a phone in Zurich, Zoe’s.

Then it disappears again.

Isobel then calls Zoe and gives her the address.  It’s a short call.

Calls to Sebastian and Rupert mobilize them, and everyone is on their way to John’s location.

…

Today’s writing, with Zoe languishing in a dungeon waiting for a white knight, 2,011 words, for a total of 61,922.