365 Days of writing, 2026 – 166

Day 166 – Perfection might just be impossible

…

The Beautiful Surrender: Why Perfectionism is the Enemy of Creation

“With each project, you eventually have to surrender the perfect version of the work to make room for what you actually create.”

When I first read this quote by Leslie Jamison, it felt like a gentle exhale. As creators—whether we are writing, coding, painting, or strategising—we spend an exhausting amount of time living in the “Perfect Version.”

The Perfect Version is that pristine, shimmering ghost of a project that lives in your head. It is the version where the prose is flawless, the code is bug-free on the first run, and the design captures the exact emotion you intended without a single misplaced pixel.

But there is a problem with the Perfect Version: It doesn’t actually exist.

The Trap of the Platonic Ideal

We often treat the “Perfect Version” as a gold standard. We think that if we just push a little harder, work a few more nights, or refine one more sentence, we will finally bridge the gap between that mental ideal and reality.

But as Jamison suggests, holding onto that perfection isn’t a pursuit of excellence; it’s a form of obstruction. The Perfect Version is static and sterile. It is a monument to what could be, but it prevents the birth of what is. By obsessing over the ideal, we stifle the messy, human, and surprising elements that make a project truly alive.

Why We Must Surrender

To “surrender the perfect version” sounds like giving up, but it is actually an act of bravery. Here is why it is the most important step in any creative process:

1. Reality is more interesting than abstraction. The Perfect Version is safe because it hasn’t been tested. The work you actually create, however, is shaped by your limitations, your constraints, and the real-world feedback you receive. There is a jagged beauty in the edges of a real project that a perfect, abstract idea could never replicate.

2. Perfectionism is a form of procrastination. It is easy to stay in the “planning” or “polishing” phase because that is where the work remains safe from criticism. To release a project into the world is to risk being judged. Surrendering the perfect vision is the only way to move from “dreaming” to “doing.”

3. The work needs room to breathe. A piece of art or a professional project is not a static object; it is a conversation. It needs to breathe. When you surrender your rigid expectations, you allow the project to evolve. You allow it to be better than you initially imagined because you are no longer forcing it to conform to a pre-defined mould.

How to Practice the Surrender

If you’re currently stuck in the grip of the Perfect Version, try these three shifts in perspective:

Define “Done” before you start. Perfection has no finish line. By setting clear parameters for completion (e.g., “I will spend four hours on this draft, and then I will send it off”), you force yourself to prioritise the work over the fantasy.
Embrace the “First Draft Energy.” Recognise that the first iteration is meant to be a rough sketch. If you treat it as a sandbox rather than a masterpiece, you remove the pressure to be perfect and open the door to being authentic.
Focus on the “What” rather than the “How.” Instead of obsessing over whether the work is perfectly executed, focus on whether the work effectively communicates your message or solves the problem.

Final Thoughts

The next time you find yourself stuck, replaying the same project over and over in your mind, remember Leslie Jamison’s words. Your desire for perfection is a barrier.

Give yourself permission to let the ideal version die. It is only in that surrender that you can reclaim the space to create something real, something tangible, and—most importantly—something done.

What project have you been holding onto because it wasn’t “perfect” enough? Maybe today is the day to let it go.

…

What I learned about writing – Dense conspiracies and zany plotting

Spinning Shadows into Sparkle: The Zany Art of Conspiracy Comedy

Isn’t it fascinating how our minds gravitate towards patterns in the chaos? How the whispered “what if” can quickly blossom into a sprawling, intricate web of secret societies, hidden agendas, and dark forces pulling the strings? The appeal of a good conspiracy is undeniable, tapping into our deepest fears and our innate desire for meaning, even if that meaning points to malevolent forces.

But what if those shadowy figures wear mismatched socks? What if their nefarious plot hinges on the strategic deployment of artisanal pickles? What if the hero unearthing the truth is less a grizzled detective and more a bewildered barista?

This, my friends, is the magical alchemy we’re talking about: taking the genuine chill of darkness and paranoia, threading a dense tapestry of conspiracy, and then weaving through it with a generous dose of tongue-in-cheek humour and a plot so zany it practically winks at you. It’s a delicate dance, a narrative tightrope walk, but when executed well, it creates some of the most memorable and beloved stories out there.

So, how do we try to achieve this glorious narrative concoction?

1. Acknowledging the Shadow: The Foundation of Fear

You can’t have effective satire without a genuine understanding of what you’re satirising. The first step in threading dense conspiracies with humour is to start with the darkness. The paranoia needs to feel real, at least initially. The stakes should, at some level, be genuinely high.

How we do it: We establish an underlying threat that feels substantial. The shadowy organisation is powerful. Their goals are unsettling. Without that genuine undercurrent of dread, the humour lands flat. It’s the contrast with this genuine darkness that makes the absurdity sing. Imagine a secret society plotting global domination – that’s the serious core.

2. The Intricate Web: Conspiracies You Can (Almost) Believe

A “dense conspiracy” isn’t just a list of random bad things happening. It’s an interconnected narrative, a puzzle where every piece seems to fit, even if the grand picture is utterly bonkers.

How we do it: We layer the clues, introduce a cast of characters with mysterious motives, and connect the dots between the utterly mundane and the outrageously sinister. Perhaps a global drought is linked to a mega-corp’s new line of flavoured seltzer. Maybe the disappearance of garden gnomes is a precursor to an alien invasion. The logic, however flawed, must be internally consistent within its own absurd framework. The more intricate the web, the more satisfying its eventual, often ridiculous, unravelling. It makes the audience feel smart for “figuring it out,” even if what they’ve figured out is that pigeons are the true global overlords.

3. The Knowing Wink: Tongue-in-Cheek Humour

This isn’t slapstick for its own sake (though a little never hurt!). “Tongue-in-cheek” implies a shared understanding, a subtle nod to the audience that “we know this is ridiculous, and that’s the point.”

How we do it:
- Character-driven absurdity: A villain who meticulously plans world domination but forgets their lunch. A reluctant hero whose biggest concern is finding strong coffee. The deadpan delivery of utterly insane dialogue.
- Situational irony: The world-ending device being housed in a municipal library’s lost-and-found. The most devastating secret being revealed on a children’s TV show.
- Subversion of tropes: Taking every classic conspiracy theory cliché (the all-seeing eye, the secret handshake, the cryptic message) and twisting it just enough to make it funny without losing its essence.
- Self-awareness: The narrative often winks at its own ridiculousness, but never breaks character entirely. It’s about finding the humour within the grand conspiracy, not just overlaying it.

4. Embracing the Bizarre: The Zany Plot

This is where the gloves come off and imagination truly runs wild. If the conspiracy is the skeleton, the zany plot is the vibrant, unpredictable flesh.

How we do it: We throw out conventional narrative structures and embrace escalating absurdity. Where a secret society’s ultimate weapon might be a mind-control disco ball, or the key to decoding ancient alien texts involves mastering the art of interpretive dance. The plot twists aren’t just unexpected; they’re wildly, joyfully ludicrous. The solutions to the grand mystery are often simpler (or infinitely more complicated) than anyone could have imagined. Think unexpected car chases involving unicycles, secret lair entrances hidden behind a perpetually broken vending machine, or a climax involving a very confused squirrel.

5. The Secret Sauce: Balance and Juxtaposition

Ultimately, the magic lies in the blend. It’s a constant push and pull between the serious and the silly, the ominous and the outright absurd.

How we do it:
- Pacing: We know when to lean into the genuine tension and dread for a moment, making the audience genuinely concerned, before puncturing that tension with a perfectly timed gag.
- Contrast: A serious, menacing monologue from a villain, immediately followed by the revelation that they’re wearing bunny slippers. A crucial clue found written on a napkin from a questionable fast-food joint.
- Anchoring Characters: Often, one or two characters serve as the audience’s anchor, reacting to the madness around them with relatable bewilderment or exasperated cynicism, which amplifies the humour.

Creating a narrative that blends darkness and paranoia with dense conspiracies, tongue-in-cheek humour, and a zany plot isn’t just writing; it’s an art form. It’s about acknowledging the very real anxieties that fuel conspiracy theories, then bravely, playfully, and subversively laughing in their face. It’s about building a world that feels both terrifyingly familiar and delightfully insane. And when it works, it’s an unforgettable journey into the heart of madness, where you’re never quite sure whether to gasp in fear or double over with laughter.

What are your favorite examples of stories that nail this unique blend? Let us know in the comments below!

365 Days of writing, 2026 – 164/165

Days 164 and 165 – Writing exercise – Set a story on a plane

…

It had been a long couple of months, and having completed the mandatory training and refresher courses, locked down for the whole time at the company’s dedicated training facility, it was time for a recreation break.

For that, I was heading to a tropical retreat in Jamaica in the Caribbean. The shack was booked, and all I had to do was catch three planes.

In other words, the next 48 hours could run smoothly, or it could turn into a bigger disaster than some of the missions I’d been sent on.

I was hoping for the first and expecting the second.

It didn’t start well. The taxi I caught to the airport stopped to let me off in the designated drop-off zone, but it was for the wrong airline.

The driver apologised and offered to go around again, but that was mentioned how I wanted to spend the next half hour of my life. I paid him and got out.

I went into the airport terminal and started a long hike back to the departure area for my airline. Fortunately, it was well signed, unlike some airports I’d been to.

Foot traffic was like the home time crush, and I had to pick my way through strolling families, children racing around bereft of parental control, elderly people who had all the time in the world, cranky businessmen in a hurry, and people who were standing around in groups cluttering the walkways.

I was glad I didn’t have any suitcases. There were enough baggage trolleys to crash into as it was. Including those being driven recklessly by children and almost wrecking a holiday before it got started.

My left ankle was still sore from the last would-be racing driver.

At the checking counter, I joined a long line that was moving slowly.

It always amused me that people always spoke louder when standing in a queue. I would have thought that such comments as the desirability of a male colleague, and 8 on the 1 to 10 scale, might have warranted hushed tones. Along with the inference, one of the girls had slept with him.

The other was unimpressed. He was married. Scandalous, maybe to me, but they both giggled.

That was in front of me. Behind, a man was telling whoever would listen that he hadn’t been back home in three years and was expecting no one would remember him. He was an accountant, so no one was surprised.

There were more, but I reached the counter by then and took a minute, perhaps a little longer. I could only check in for the first flight, not all the way through. I’d opted for cheap.

No baggage, passport in order, seat allocation and gate pass done. I was travelling coach class and got an aisle seat. It remained to be seen how that played out. Travelling by any means these days was like walking through a minefield.

As it was only domestic, I went through the TSA check, getting a nod from one of the officers, as an acquaintance from another life, and went up to the departure level. It was a bit early to go to the gate.

I’d have some airport takeout just in case the airline had nothing to offer. Given the fare I paid, I seriously doubted they could afford water.

I settled on greasy chicken and fries.

Tables were scattered everywhere, and I selected one with two seats and seeing there was competition for it, hastened my pace to get there first. It was that time of day when everyone seemed to be hungry.

Surviving the death stare from the other hunter, I sat back and contemplated the rest of the diners. It was a habit more than anything else. It converted about two or three hundred.

Families, children arguing over burgers, chicken and fries, large cups of sugary drinks, not the best for them before getting on the plane, businessmen, sitting at single tables with coffee and a sandwich, teenagers, a group on a tour, no doubt like Rome or maybe not, all excited at the fact they were escaping school. Some had that doe-eyed look of high school sweethearts, and trouble looming.

I remembered the one trip my class had gone on and the fallout from that.

There were groups of elderly passengers also going on a holiday, a tour guide trying to keep them together, and women, one group in particular, that looked like trouble. One had just returned with a dozen drinks, wiped escaping their husbands, and why not?

No immediate threats.

I looked at the chicken, shrugged and took a chip instead. The coffee tasted like instant, water and powdered milk. Who knew what came out of that coffee machine, but it wasn’t what I would call coffee. Maybe my standards were too high.

Then I saw rather than heard a strange sound, and followed it to a table four along and one out from the shrubbery. Four seats. One man, a thug in a suit, a well-dressed man who reeked of money but not class, and a young woman who was trying not to look terrified.

I suspect the man in the suit had inflicted some hidden punishment on her because she was massaging her hand. I looked away just before he looked in my direction.

He did the same scan I had, looking for trouble.

This could be one of two scenarios. The girl, girlfriend or spouse had tried to run away and had been caught. Usually, they would return by car, but maybe they were from overseas. The three men looked foreign.

The other, less likely, was a felon being taken back to jail. Or elsewhere, but then she would be in cuffs. He didn’t look like law enforcement.

Another thug in a suit came back with a tray of food and drinks and distributed it before sitting. An air of serenity settled on them.

I went back to my chicken.

…

It was a relatively calm half hour; the children at the table next to me were the typical family. The boy wanted a hamburger and got chicken; the girl wanted chicken and got a hamburger. The boy took a bite out of the chicken, and the girl refused to eat it.

Dad didn’t get the free toy that came with the food, and in the end, the mother had to sort it all out. The father typically got exactly what he wanted.

Another child and another nearby table spilt his drink all over the father, and harsh words and tears ensued.

Queues for food were long, and tempers were fraying. My new friends, four tables over to the left, left their mess on the table and walked off, the girl almost dragged away by the man in the expensive suit.

Something was definitely wrong there.

The lady who was wiping tables just had a whole lot more work added to the endless task of cleaning up spilled drinks and food scraps thrown on the floor. People obviously left their manners at home.

I cleaned up my mess, wiped the table with a spare wet towel and dumped the leftovers in the appropriate bin. The cleaning lady smiled in my direction. That was one less out of 200 tables.

I wandered slowly towards the gate, with a little under an hour to go. There were people scattered in the seating area, including my new friends. On my way in, I surreptitiously took a photograph of the rich guy, and when I sat down, studied it.

He had a familiar look, not belonging to someone I had met before, but someone I had seen before. The seat next to me had a hostile folder of newspapers sitting on it, perhaps from the last flight out.

Maybe if they were leaving from here, they would be in the local paper.

Or as loath as I was to call upon a friend, who was a colleague who’d done favours for me in the past, I could send a copy of the photo and ask him to identify who it is.

Of course, it came with a degree of risk, especially if the person had a history. I sent it anyway; Rodney would make an assessment and let me know.

Five minutes. My cell phone vibrated. “Investigating!”

Meanwhile, back in the newspaper, The Denver Post, I found it odd to be reading an actual newspaper and not the usual online services. If I were staying instead of passing through, like some of the others on refresher courses, it would make a useful reference.

But nothing about our mysterious man or his companion. But if I wanted to find out where the 4th July fireworks displays were, very useful.

I didn’t plan to be in the country. The holiday had lost its significance given the times we were in, and the fact that our history was being rewritten to reflect something that was nothing like what happened.

My father, who has been an American History professor and scholar of all things American, including the so-called shameful parts of it, would be spinning in his grave. I was just plain disappointed.

Just as the boarding call came, my phone vibrated again. “Sam Kawalski and the woman Zuzanna Wojcik, the youngest daughter of the alleged head of a crime family from New Jersey. They were married about a month ago. Documents attached.”

I sent back a thanks and joined the queue. I took the paper for the crossword and had some interesting reading.

They were sitting up front. I was sitting in the back. Fortunately, this time I was not surrounded by children. I was, however, in direct line to the restrooms. It was going to be a fun four hours.

…

I only had to stand once to let the window seat passenger in. Our plane was not full, and a lot of middle seats were free.

She smiled politely as she squeezed past after putting her small suitcase in the overhead bin, then sat. My initial assessment was that she was dressed to travel in business class, and maybe hoping for an upgrade.

She had that purposeful look like she was coming from or going to a meeting, what I would call an executive, though her age may suggest either lawyer or accountant.

Then I decided it was none of my business.

Until she spoke to me. Normally, I would just ignore fellow passengers, or they would ignore me. But this was coach, I was used to business. People around me nodded or said hello.

“Work or pleasure?”

It took a moment to register that she was speaking to me. My attention was still on Kawalski, and the other passengers who brought far too much cabin luggage. The hostesses were working overtime trying to find space and shunt tardy and somewhat confused people to their seats.

I turned to look at her and realised she might be older than I first thought. Which had absolutely no bearing on anything.

“A business meeting, then pleasure. Jamaica.” I don’t know why I told her where I was going.

“Lucky you. I’ve been there once, to a conference, and didn’t get much time to see the sights. Keep meaning to go back.”

“If only we had 40-hour days?”

She took that in, processed it, then smiled again. I could not imagine her being angry.

“If only.”

“You? Business or something else?” I deliberately threw in a curve, just to see what happened.

A momentary expression changed, just long enough for those trained to look for them to see it. Then back again.

“I would be in a party dress if it were not business.”

Was there just a slight edge to her tone?

In any other situation, I might have said she would look nice in a party dress, but these days those sorts of comments are frowned upon.

“I’m sorry then.”

“For what?”

“Forgetting that others have to work. You don’t need people saying they’re going on holiday when you’re not.”

“It doesn’t bother me, after all, I asked you first.”

Her tone had suggested otherwise, but then my tone would be grumpy if the person next to me started babbling on about where they were going.

But good or bad, it killed the moment, and she rummaged in her bag and pulled out a Kindle reader.

One more supposition, she probably read romance novels. I wrestled the paper into a smaller square and started on the crossword.

All the passengers were aboard, and the hostesses were doing their mandatory checks. The door had been closed.

We would be leaving on time.

…

The trouble with travelling in a confined space with a lot of people is that no matter how hard you try to shut people out, you can’t.

Up front of the plane, you are more isolated; back in the rear, you are surrounded. Screaming kids, noisy parents, the one person who has the volume up high, and the kid who runs up and down the aisle, bumping people.

And as I discovered, the number of people who lurch from side to side, bumping people as they go. And the proximity to the restrooms, people congregated, towering over you, squashing into you when they tried to move out of the way.

And the conversations they had. People whom you’d least expect to speak like drunken sailors three sheets to the wind. I felt it necessary to stand, accidentally standing on one of their feet, and apologising profusely, after causing her to cry out in pain, and then getting assistance back to her seat.

A half dozen people nodded in my direction, clearly relieved that they had gone away. My neighbour thought it amusing, perhaps something she would have done herself.

People were more wary standing anywhere near me when they came, or, like sensible people, waited for the green light before coming down.

The next time she headed down, without her friend, I stood and went down to the galley to stand by the rear exit door. She approached very cautiously.

Lesson learned.

Shortly after, the plane dipped, and we were in landing mode. I went back to my seat. The hostesses passed through the plane, getting everyone sorted.

The last trolley had passed by into the galley, just as we all heard the girl who had suffered that unfortunate accident, now standing next to the last seat in business class, pointing and yelling, “You’re that horrible man who beat up my friend at Rodin’s the other night.”

She was pointing directly at the man in the suit.

Next minute, one of the thugs had her in a stranglehold, and she was screaming. A scream that polarised the whole plane.

The stewards were mortified and helpless at this point. The thug was trying to quieten her, and there were groans and complaints, until the thug yelled out, “Everyone, be quiet or else.

The last two words carried emphasis and a latent threat. The noise died down.

It drew an uncharacteristic response from my travelling companion, “What the fuck… “

“An altercation with that girl. Seems she knows one of the passengers in business, and not in a good way.”

The thug wasn’t letting her go, but at least the screams had stopped. So had everything.

I turned around, and the hostess was on the phone with the captain. I heard, “We have a situation…”

That was putting it mildly. This was a no-win situation for anyone. We wouldn’t be landing with passengers standing in the aisle. The thug had nowhere to go. The girl would be leveraged until she wasn’t. Just the thought of that worried me.

Planes were small places where things could go wrong very quickly.

And Kowalski had become a cornered rat.

The papers on him were basically the bio of a kid gone wrong, hitching his wagon to the wrong train, marrying the boss’s daughter, and then committing the ultimate folly, thinking his status could protect him from being stupid.

On bail for the assault, he was fleeing. If it wasn’t for the fact that his wife was running from him, also a victim of assault, he would not have been in Denver.

He was a bail violator and now a party to what could be described as a major aeroplane felony. With a plane load of hostages.

The Captain had nowhere to go, but had to try.

“Everyone not involved in the situation, please resume your seats and prepare for landing. This plane cannot land until all passengers have resumed their seats. Be advised that we will not be using a gate, but have been directed to another section of the airport where both local police and the FBI will be waiting. I would ask that no one make this any worse than it already is, and would ask for calm and obey any and all instructions given by the senior cabin steward.”

The girl’s companion was now telling everyone in a loud voice the circumstances of their friend’s assault, and using disparaging language directed at Kowalski. The other thug was waiting for a signal from Kawalski.

At least everyone was reseated except for the thug with the girl, who was now sobbing.

Kawalski stood and glared at the cabin manager, also responsible for the business class passengers.

He told the thug to bring the girl forward, and he told the manager to empty the first three rows and seat them elsewhere.

It looked like one or two were going to argue, but then the other got out of his seat and dragged one of the complainers out of his seat. The rest moved quickly, taking what they could.

So far, so good.

I slowly got out of my seat and went back to the hostess on the phone.

“Sir, you should go back to your seat.”

“I might be able to help. Can you ask the captain to talk to whoever it is in New York and ask them if there is a Joseph Binns in the terminal? He’s my boss and someone who deals with situations like this. He’ll know I’m on board.”

“Who are you?”

“Who I am is irrelevant. Except I could become those two thugs worst nightmare. Kawalski, their boss, is bad news. He’s bringing his wife back to New Jersey against her will, and I think he was hoping this would go under the radar.”

At that moment, I realised the plane had levelled out and was in a large circuit. It might not last long if the fuel is low.

“Are you law enforcement?”

“Not the sort that flashed badges. Just ask him to call.”

She did, relaying a brief resume of what I told her.

“He’s talking to them now.”

Five long minutes passed before I saw her move slightly, then say, “He’s here.” She passed me the phone.

“Kevin Andrews?” He asked.

“Yes.”

“I’m told you might be able to help.”

“We’re not going to get on the ground while they are moving around. Also, I think they will start using passengers to force you to land the plane, and probably use some to get away once we are on the ground. This is one of those no-win situations.”

“Not ideal then?”

He was calm and probably hoping his worst nightmare was a flaky engine.

“It never is. I’m going to try to neutralise the problem. It might get messy. And I might not succeed. But I could use the element of surprise. Can you make sudden downwards or sideways movements, the sort where you are briefly disoriented? Kind of like hitting an air pocket.”

“When?”

“Give it ten minutes. No warning, just do it. Hard left and down. Hopefully, I’ll be in place by then.”

“Ten minutes. Got it. Good luck.”

I was hugging to need it.

I handed the phone back. “Stow everything likely to cause a problem. If you can tell those up the front with alerting them, do it.”

The other steward unlocked a drawer and pulled out a rather interesting knife. It might be illegal, but it was going to make my job easier.

“Got any string, rope, bindings?”

From the same drawer, twine. Ideal.

“Good. Keep it handy.” I took the knife and hid it up my sleeve.

I looked at my watch. Seven minutes. I shrugged. Time to go.

I slowly walked up the aisle. My row companion gave me a rather wide-eyed look as I went past. Maybe she thought I had a death wish.

Maybe I did.

I took my time. Halfway, one of the thugs saw me.

“Go back to your seat.”

“Sorry. Can’t. Have to use the restrooms. Ours are full of people sitting because of you.”

I edged slowly closer, both watching me. What they were going to do was the unpredictable item in this equation.

Eight minutes, alongside the first row of coach. Five years, maybe six. The steward and manager had moved back into the galley area. The two men and the girl were near the door.

I would only have a few seconds at best, and I would have to incapacitate them. The knife would do that if I got them in the right place. Luckily, part of the refresher I’d just been on was 101 ways to silently and quickly kill your enemy with a knife. Any knife.

Nine minutes. I took a deep breath and let it go slowly. Calm.

…

Odd that in those last few seconds, I suddenly remembered nearly every time I’d landed at JFK and about 20 or 20 minutes out, we hit turbulence, once so bad it made most of the passengers airsick.

And on cue, ten seconds before the plane was to lurch, we hit turbulence and, thirty seconds after that, an air pocket and suddenly the plane dipped, violently.

Anyone who wasn’t in a seat belt hit the roof. I was vac3d because I was expecting a lurch. In the end, the turbulence did the job for me.

The two thugs and Kawalski hit the roof and were knocked clean out. The plane found clean air with a thud, but the turbulence didn’t stop. The captain explained and asked for calm.

Everyone had heeded the earlier seatbelt call, and the only three casualties were the three problem passengers. The girl had fainted just before the air pocket, and the thug had ironically protected her from hitting the roof.

She was now sprawled on the ground.

The hostess from the rear arrived breathless and with cut lengths of twine. Three burly men came and hoisted the three into seats in the front rows, and tied them very securely.

The manager up front relayed the news to the captain, and a minute or two later, we were descending. A half-hour delay. We were back to preparing the cabin for landing.

I had a few words with? First in Polish, then in English, to see if she was alright. She said she had seen me at the airport in Denver and hoped that I had recognised her distress and alerted the authorities.

She said her father would be grateful. I told her that she should forget I existed. Trouble always had a way of finding me without help.

Then I went back to my seat. In reality, I had done nothing wrong. Whatever plan I had was sketchy at best, and I thanked whoever it was for intervening.

My seat companion looked over as I did up the seatbelt. “What did you say you did for a living?”

“Problem solver, though I wouldn’t say I was very good at it. Mother Nature always has an answer to just about any problem.”

“What were you going to do?”

“Use the plane differently. Then I remembered that there’s always turbulence. Catch them off guard, maybe. In the end, I didn’t have to.”

“You do this often?”

“No.”

“Then why?”

“Somebody had to do something. I have places to be. Can’t have assholes holding me, and everyone else, up.”

“Well, this was exciting. I’m just a boring librarian who sometimes gives tours at the Smithsonian. The biggest event is someone who has a bathroom emergency. Perhaps we could start again. My name is Jennifer MacAndrews, Librarian.”

“Kevin Andrews, occasional Problem Solver.”

The plane shuddered as we went through another layer of turbulence. We could see land through the cloud cover. It would be raining when we landed.

As the wheels came down, the pilot advised us that we would be going to a closed area of the airport when the prisoners would be taken off. Then the passengers would be transferred to buses and taken to the terminal.

“Staying in New York after your meeting?” she asked.

“Yes.”

“I’m going to do something I never do. Another first, if you like. Can I buy you dinner for saving us, or trying to, anyway?”

She definitely did not look like the sort of woman who would offer dinner dates to perfect strangers. Even so, I should decline.

“You don’t know me. I could be an axe murderer.”

“You could be. I have many interesting conversational topics that might interest you, being a librarian.”

So the axe murderer line wasn’t going to work on her.

“When is your meeting?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Are you staying anywhere near the Hilton on 6th Avenue?”

“By coincidence, I am.”

“Then if I am free at 7pm, I’ll call your room, and if you’re in, we’ll see what happens?”

She smiled. “We shall.”

…

The plane landed, everyone applauded, an odd reaction and one I have never had explained.

It took a while before the FBI officers came aboard, spoke to the captain and then took the three men away. They did not take Zuzanna Wojcik.

Then the passengers filed off, and I waited until everyone left before I went forward. Jennifer waited with me. Apparently, she was in no hurry.

The captain and an FBI officer were waiting. I shook hands, told them both that I was glad I didn’t have to do anything, and that the true heroes were the passengers who tied them up.

My boss was among those at the bottom of the stairs, waiting to take me away to that meeting. I shook hands with Jennifer, and she joined the last of the passengers on the bus.

“You made a new friend.”

“Window seat, my row.”

“Not screaming kids?”

“They were three rows ahead. It’s not so bad in the back of the plane. I hear it’s the safest place in a crash.”

He shrugged. “Always something with you.”

“What can I say?”

“Next time, you will try to remain anonymous. Your next job was to investigate Zuzanna Wojcik’s family. Can’t do that now she knows who you are.”

“Or…”

He shook his head. “You really don’t have a death wish. You have two weeks’ vacation. We’ll talk about it later. Who was the girl?”

“A librarian at the Smithsonian.”

“Good. You could do well to learn something other than ways to kill people.”

If I called her. I was having second thoughts. A girl like her didn’t need to know someone like me. It was one of the downsides of the job.

The baggage handlers were offloading the last of the baggage, and the plane sat on the tarmac, now in the hands of the cleaners.

In a few hours, it would be off to another airport, most of the passengers would be going to hotels, visiting others or going home. For them, it was just another day in their lives. They would never know just how close they came to dying.

And in my case, I had been lucky. Stupid but lucky. It put a thought into my head that until I spoke to Jennifer, I would never have turned up there.

Was it time I gave up the idealistic dream that I could save the world, one mission at a time? The fact is, I couldn’t, and wasn’t.

My boss opened the door to the limo. “Opportunity awaits.”

I got in and moved over. He climbed in and shut the door. “Let’s go.”

And for the first time, I was thinking of something other than work.

…

Top 5 sights on the road less travelled – Bratislava

Beyond the Castle: 5 Offbeat Adventures in Bratislava You Won’t Find on Every Postcard

Bratislava. The name itself conjures images of a charming Old Town, the majestic castle perched above the Danube, and perhaps a quirky statue or two. And while these icons are undeniably wonderful, there’s a whole other side to Slovakia’s capital waiting to be discovered – a side that reveals the city’s true character, its rich history, and its vibrant local life, far from the well-trodden tourist paths.

If you’re ready to peel back the layers and experience Bratislava like a true explorer, here are five “road less travelled” adventures that promise unique memories and a deeper connection to this captivating city.

1. Ascend to Slavin Memorial: History, Views, and Serenity

While Bratislava Castle offers fantastic views, for a truly poignant and panoramic experience, head to Slavin Memorial. This colossal war memorial and cemetery honours the Soviet soldiers who fell liberating Bratislava during World War II. It’s a powerful, solemn place, but also one offering some of the most breathtaking, unobstructed views of the city, the Danube, and even the distant Austrian Alps.

Why it’s less travelled: Many tourists stick to the immediate Old Town. Slavin requires a short, scenic bus ride or a determined uphill walk, making it feel like a discovered secret.

What to expect: A grand staircase leading to an obelisk crowned with a triumphant soldier statue. Spend time walking among the graves, decorated with red stars, and then simply soak in the epic vista. It’s a place for reflection and stunning photography, especially at sunset.

How to get there: Take a local bus (such as number 203 or 207) from Hodžovo námestie (Presidential Palace) or take a taxi/ride-sharing service.

2. Explore the Small Carpathian Wine Route: A Taste of Local Tradition

Did you know Bratislava is the gateway to a historic wine region? Just a short drive or train ride from the city lies the Small Carpathian Wine Route (Malokarpatská Vínna Cesta), a picturesque trail dotted with charming winemaking villages like Pezinok and Modra. This region has been producing wine for centuries, and it’s a delightful escape from urban life.

Why it’s less travelled: While some tour operators offer trips, many independent travellers miss this authentic experience, opting for day trips to neighbouring capitals instead.

What to expect: Hop on a local train to Pezinok or Modra, and wander through their quaint streets. Look for traditional wine cellars (“vínne pivnice”) offering tastings of local varietals like Grüner Veltliner, Frankovka Modrá (Blaufränkisch), and Müller-Thurgau. Many wineries offer delicious regional snacks to accompany your tasting. If visiting in autumn, look out for the “burčiak,” a partially fermented young wine – a local delicacy!

How to get there: Take a regional train from Bratislava Hlavná Stanica (Main Station) to Pezinok or Modra. The journey takes around 20-30 minutes.

3. Discover the Danubiana Meulensteen Art Museum: Art on the Water

For a dose of contemporary art in an utterly unique setting, make your way to the Danubiana Meulensteen Art Museum. Located on a peninsula in the Danube River, about 15km south of Bratislava, this modern art gallery is a masterpiece in itself, offering stunning architecture, thought-provoking exhibitions, and incredible river views.

Why it’s less travelled: Its location outside the immediate city centre means it’s often overlooked by visitors with limited time.

What to expect: A captivating journey through modern and contemporary art, primarily by Slovak and international artists. The museum’s design allows natural light to flood the spaces, and the outdoor sculpture park, with its whimsical pieces set against the river backdrop, is a joy to explore. You can even enjoy a coffee with a view from their café.

How to get there: The most scenic (and recommended) way is by a special tourist boat that departs from Fajnorovo nábrežie near the Old Town (check seasonal schedules). Alternatively, take a local bus (number 90) from Nový Most (UFO Bridge) or a taxi/ride-sharing service.

4. Hike to Kamzík TV Tower & Koliba: Nature, Adventure, and Views

Escape the city hustle and immerse yourself in nature by heading up to the forested hills of Koliba, home to the iconic Kamzík TV Tower. This area is a beloved recreational spot for locals, offering hiking trails, a bobsled track, and, of course, the observation deck of the TV tower for breathtaking panoramic views.

Why it’s less travelled: Many tourists don’t realise such an extensive green space, complete with a TV tower offering great views, is so accessible from the city.

What to expect: Take the historic Kamzík cable car (Železná studnička – Koliba) up the hill, or hike one of the many well-marked trails. Once at the top, you can ascend the TV tower for 360-degree vistas (there’s also a rotating restaurant at the top if you’re feeling fancy!). In winter, it’s a popular spot for sledding, and in warmer months, you’ll find families picnicking and enjoying the fresh air.

How to get there: Take tram number 3 or 9 to the “Železná studnička” stop, then walk or take the cable car up to Koliba. Alternatively, bus number 203 or 207 will get you closer to the TV Tower area.

5. Dive into Local Life at Miletičova Tržnica (Market): A Sensory Feast

For an authentic slice of everyday Bratislava life, head to Miletičova Tržnica, the city’s largest outdoor and indoor market. This isn’t a quaint artisan market; it’s a bustling, vibrant hub where locals come to buy fresh produce, clothes, household goods, and indulge in hearty Slovak street food.

Why it’s less travelled: It’s located outside the immediate city centre in a residential area, away from the typical tourist routes.

What to expect: A kaleidoscope of sights, sounds, and smells! Browse stalls overflowing with seasonal fruits, vegetables, cheeses, and smoked meats. Discover quirky fashion, electronics, and souvenirs. But the real highlight is the food: grab a langoš (fried dough with garlic, cheese, and sour cream), a pecené kura (roasted chicken), or a classic halušky (potato dumplings) from one of the many unassuming food stands. It’s an affordable and delicious way to sample local flavours.

How to get there: Take a tram (e.g., number 8 or 9) or bus (e.g., number 50 or 53) to the “Miletičova” stop.

Bratislava is a city that rewards those who dare to venture beyond the obvious. These five experiences offer a taste of its diverse history, natural beauty, artistic spirit, and authentic local charm. So, next time you find yourself in Slovakia’s captivating capital, step off the well-worn path and create your own unique Bratislava story. You won’t regret it!

Top 5 sights on the road less travelled – Prague

Prague Beyond the Crowds: Five Distinctive Gems for a Serene Escape

Prague. The very name conjures images of fairytale castles, winding cobblestone streets, and the timeless beauty of a city steeped in history. It’s truly magical – but that magic often comes with a hefty dose of crowds, especially in peak season.

If you’re dreaming of experiencing Prague’s unique charm without the elbow-to-elbow shuffling, you’re in luck! The Golden City holds countless hidden treasures that are just as distinctive, beautiful, and rich in history as their more famous counterparts, yet remain wonderfully uncrowded.

As a seasoned traveller and admirer of Prague, I’ve curated a list of five visitor attractions that offer a distinctive experience, breathtaking beauty, and, most importantly, a peaceful retreat from the madding crowds.

1. Vyšehrad: Prague’s Ancient Citadel with Panoramic Views

Often overshadowed by Prague Castle, Vyšehrad is older, equally significant, and immensely more tranquil. Perched on a dramatic rock overlooking the Vltava River, this historic fort and castle complex offers a captivating journey through Czech history, mythology, and art.

Why it’s distinctive:

Historical Significance: Believed to be the original seat of the Czech princes before Prague Castle.
St. Peter and Paul Basilica: A stunning neo-Gothic church with intricate frescoes and a peaceful atmosphere.
Slavín Cemetery: The final resting place of many famous Czech artists, writers, and composers (Dvořák, Smetana, and Mucha), featuring elaborate and beautiful tombstones.
Panoramic Views: Breathtaking vistas of the Vltava River, Prague Castle, and the entire city.
Rotunda of St. Martin: Prague’s oldest surviving Romanesque rotunda.

Why it’s not crowded: It’s slightly outside the immediate city centre, requiring a short tram or metro ride, which deters many casual tourists. Those who make the effort are rewarded with space, serenity, and discovery.

2. Strahov Monastery Library: A Baroque Masterpiece of Knowledge

Tucked away near Prague Castle, the Strahov Monastery Library is a truly awe-inspiring sight that feels like stepping into another world. While part of a larger monastery that sees some visitors, the library itself often requires pre-booked tours or specific entry, which naturally limits crowd size, allowing for a more intimate viewing experience.

Why it’s distinctive:

Philosophical Hall & Theological Hall: Two magnificent Baroque halls housing over 200,000 volumes.
Stunning Frescoes: Intricate ceiling frescoes depicting the history of mankind and the pursuit of knowledge.
Historical Globes & Curiosities: A collection of ancient globes, natural history specimens, and other fascinating artifacts.
Architectural Grandeur: The sheer scale and ornamentation of the halls are breathtaking.

Why it’s not crowded: Its location, slightly up a hill from Prague Castle (though easily walkable), and its specific entry requirements mean it’s not a place for a quick glance. Those who visit are genuinely interested in its unique beauty and history.

3. Wallenstein Garden (Valdštejnská Zahrada): Baroque Splendor in Malá Strana

Just a stone’s throw from the bustling Malá Strana (Lesser Town) square, the Wallenstein Garden is a Baroque masterpiece that often gets overlooked. Belonging to the Wallenstein Palace (home to the Czech Senate), this meticulously maintained garden is a tranquil oasis.

Why it’s distinctive:

Manicured Lawns & Hedges: Perfect geometric designs characteristic of Baroque gardens.
Exquisite Statues: Bronze sculptures by Adriaen de Vries, depicting mythological figures.
The Salla Terrena: A grand triple arch loggia adorned with frescoes, hosting concerts in summer.
Artificial Grotto (Grotta): A fantastical, stalactite-lined cave structure that’s utterly unique.
Peacocks: Elegant white peacocks roam freely, adding to the garden’s enchanting atmosphere.

Why it’s not crowded: It’s a bit hidden from the main tourist routes, and while many walk past the palace, fewer venture into the garden’s entrance. It’s often free to enter, making it an incredible value for such beauty. (Check seasonal opening times, as it’s typically closed in winter).

4. Vrtba Garden (Vrtbovská Zahrada): A Hidden Terraced Gem

Considered one of Prague’s most beautiful Baroque gardens, the Vrtba Garden is a true hidden gem, tucked away behind a modest archway in Malá Strana. This terraced garden ascends steeply, offering increasingly spectacular views as you climb.

Why it’s distinctive:

Intimate Baroque Design: Smaller and more secluded than Wallenstein, with a romantic, secret garden feel.
Terraced Levels: Each level reveals new perspectives, fountains, statues, and intricate floral arrangements.
Stunning Views: From the top terrace, you get a unique, close-up vista of Prague Castle, St. Nicholas Church, and the red rooftops of Malá Strana.
Rich Sculpture & Frescoes: Adorned with works by Matthias Braun and frescoes by Reiner.

Why it’s not crowded: Its rather unassuming entrance on Karmelitská Street means it’s easily missed. There’s a small entrance fee, which further deters casual visitors, ensuring a peaceful and exclusive experience for those who seek it out. (Another seasonal garden, typically closed in winter).

5. Letná Park (Letenské Sady): Iconic Views and Local Vibe

While popular with locals, Letná Park rarely sees the kind of tourist throngs that flood the Charles Bridge. This expansive park stretches along a plateau on the left bank of the Vltava River, offering some of the most iconic panoramic views of Prague.

Why it’s distinctive:

The Metronome: Standing on the former site of a gigantic Stalin monument, Prague’s giant metronome is a symbol of passing time and offers a fantastic photo op.
Beer Garden: A beloved spot, particularly in warmer months, where you can enjoy a Czech beer with an unparalleled backdrop of the city’s bridges and Old Town.
Skate Park & Open Spaces: Popular with skateboarders and locals enjoying a stroll, picnic, or simply relaxing.
Breathtaking Vistas: Arguably the best spot to capture the iconic shot of all of Prague’s bridges spanning the Vltava.

Why it’s not crowded: It’s a park designed for space and relaxation, so even with many people, it rarely feels cramped. It requires a bit of an uphill walk (or a short tram ride) from the river, which means it’s a destination rather than a stop on a crowded route.

Embark on a Prague adventure that’s truly yours. By venturing slightly off the most beaten path, you’ll discover a Prague that’s just as magnificent, but far more serene. You’ll not only see distinctive features but also gain a deeper connection to the city’s enduring charm, away from the hustle and bustle.

Have you discovered any other uncrowded Prague gems? Share your favourites in the comments below!