Category: Review

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 26

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

There is a history of strong female characters. They don’t have to be the lead character in order to become a focal point in the story.

I’m reminded of the CIA agent in Cuba in the latest James Bond Film, No Time To Die, where she literally kicks ass. To my mind, that is a girl to be reckoned with, and no, I would not want to meet her in a dark alley or be her enemy.

I wanted one, and put her in the Zoe series, an assassin without a conscience, but has one of those life-defining moments that doesn’t take away anything from her character, just adds another dimension.

This story is going to have one too, Teresa, only she is a different kettle of fish, to quote an analogy.

She is just the sort of person our main character’s handler recruits in a heartbeat. The fact she is in jail when we first meet her just adds to the mystique.

And when the main character and her meet, it’s like water and oil. She had a role to play, even if it’s not the one our main character is led to believe is.

The trouble is, I’m having too much fun playing to the two off against each other, so much so, I’m beginning to like her, as much as I would, in real life (if such a person existed) fear her.

Interesting question: how would I react if my imaginary world suddenly became all too real?

I guess that’s another story.

Searching for locations: The apartments at Greve in Chianti, Tuscany, Italy

When we first planned to stay in Tuscany for a few days, we wanted to be in a central area.  We had thought of staying in Florence and making daily treks, but the tour operator we selected told us it would be better if we stayed closer to Arezzo.

We picked Greve in Chianti, and a place called Antico Pastificio, we booked a standard apartment with two bedrooms, and it was about as authentic Italian you could get.  The building we stayed in was the yellow pasta factory, and the apartment named ‘Iris’.

It was only steps away from the main square, shops, restaurants, and at the opposite end, the quaint ringing of church bells at various times during the day.

Gaining access was through a very narrow arch which required some deft driving and then up the road.  There were villas and two large apartment blocks.

You can just see the archway at the end of the road. 
This was the entrance to our room,

 along a passage and up the stairs, turning left at the top.

 Going straight ahead through the gate to the car park, 

and access to the grounds behind the buildings.

This was the view from the lounge/living room.  The days were hot, and on several evenings it rained, breaking the heat and making the evenings sitting by the window cool and refreshing.

 And the last view is looking towards the town piazza and the church

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 26

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

There is a history of strong female characters. They don’t have to be the lead character in order to become a focal point in the story.

I’m reminded of the CIA agent in Cuba in the latest James Bond Film, No Time To Die, where she literally kicks ass. To my mind, that is a girl to be reckoned with, and no, I would not want to meet her in a dark alley or be her enemy.

I wanted one, and put her in the Zoe series, an assassin without a conscience, but has one of those life-defining moments that doesn’t take away anything from her character, just adds another dimension.

This story is going to have one too, Teresa, only she is a different kettle of fish, to quote an analogy.

She is just the sort of person our main character’s handler recruits in a heartbeat. The fact she is in jail when we first meet her just adds to the mystique.

And when the main character and her meet, it’s like water and oil. She had a role to play, even if it’s not the one our main character is led to believe is.

The trouble is, I’m having too much fun playing to the two off against each other, so much so, I’m beginning to like her, as much as I would, in real life (if such a person existed) fear her.

Interesting question: how would I react if my imaginary world suddenly became all too real?

I guess that’s another story.

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 25

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

A writer has to be all people, and, sometimes that can be a difficult remit.

To start with, I know what it’s like to travel, stay, and work in remote, sometimes primitive, locations. Getting there is sometimes a laborious task, battling the weather, the people, and the authorities.

It can be scary at best and terrifying at worst.

And it can be lonely with tenuous links to those back home.

Now, supplant that with the fact you are in that place on false pretences. You now have to channel all of the above and find a degree of both bravado and confidence, which most times, in reality, you don’t have.

Easy, you say, to write about, because you’re not really there, so you can be whatever you want, do whatever you want.

The problem is, it still has to be believable.

So we’re starting with a character that has a job to do, preferably to be on his own so he doesn’t have to be responsible for anyone he’s working with and can use any or all means available to get the job done.

Still not a difficult portrayal.

Quite often there’s no need to complicate the character by adding a background life, which might mean that he has a wife, which is unlikely if he is an agent provocateur, a girlfriend, which is also unlikely, because as a lover, he doesn’t need the distraction or the problem of keeping secrets, which, because of his job, would be a necessity.

But…

Time to add a complication.

His boss sends an assistant, or partner, one that he’s not told about.

And is a woman.

Suddenly his dynamic changes completely, and we need to have some character analysis, like his attitude to partners, and attitude towards women.

The problem is, how the reader is going to perceive this characterization, and that’s where the job becomes harder because on one hand, you want him to be the epitome of the new age man, and on the other, the hard-nosed agent that has no time for building relationships, and particularly because that person is female.

It’s going to be an interesting dynamic, and now that I have thought about, enough to write this, I can see some elements of his character will need to change.

Needless to say, she is going to be a strong female character, so more about her tomorrow.

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 24

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

I’ve come to the realization that I’m not going to get this story finished in the allotted time.

In fact, there are aspects of the story that have been bugging me, and it’s been the devil’s own job not to go back and fix some of it up. It’s probably why today’s output is terrible compared to previous days.

What I have done, as elements of the previous part of the story have had to be changed so that what happens later makes sense, I have a copious quantity of post-it notes on the desktop to remind me.

And that tells me that the whole project is getting out of hand.

As it stands, at a guestimate, this story is going to finish up over 100,000 words. If I meet the targets I’ve set myself for the rest of the month, that 30th November total should be around 85,000 words.

It’s an achievement in itself, but I’m not happy with the product as it stands. There’s going to be a huge editing blitz next month if I can face it.

As for now, it’s about 2 am and I’m very tired, I’ve just thought of another change that needs to be made, so I’m going to scribble it down and get to bed.

Thank goodness I don’t try to write all my books in a month!

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 25

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

A writer has to be all people, and, sometimes that can be a difficult remit.

To start with, I know what it’s like to travel, stay, and work in remote, sometimes primitive, locations. Getting there is sometimes a laborious task, battling the weather, the people, and the authorities.

It can be scary at best and terrifying at worst.

And it can be lonely with tenuous links to those back home.

Now, supplant that with the fact you are in that place on false pretences. You now have to channel all of the above and find a degree of both bravado and confidence, which most times, in reality, you don’t have.

Easy, you say, to write about, because you’re not really there, so you can be whatever you want, do whatever you want.

The problem is, it still has to be believable.

So we’re starting with a character that has a job to do, preferably to be on his own so he doesn’t have to be responsible for anyone he’s working with and can use any or all means available to get the job done.

Still not a difficult portrayal.

Quite often there’s no need to complicate the character by adding a background life, which might mean that he has a wife, which is unlikely if he is an agent provocateur, a girlfriend, which is also unlikely, because as a lover, he doesn’t need the distraction or the problem of keeping secrets, which, because of his job, would be a necessity.

But…

Time to add a complication.

His boss sends an assistant, or partner, one that he’s not told about.

And is a woman.

Suddenly his dynamic changes completely, and we need to have some character analysis, like his attitude to partners, and attitude towards women.

The problem is, how the reader is going to perceive this characterization, and that’s where the job becomes harder because on one hand, you want him to be the epitome of the new age man, and on the other, the hard-nosed agent that has no time for building relationships, and particularly because that person is female.

It’s going to be an interesting dynamic, and now that I have thought about, enough to write this, I can see some elements of his character will need to change.

Needless to say, she is going to be a strong female character, so more about her tomorrow.

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 25

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

A writer has to be all people, and, sometimes that can be a difficult remit.

To start with, I know what it’s like to travel, stay, and work in remote, sometimes primitive, locations. Getting there is sometimes a laborious task, battling the weather, the people, and the authorities.

It can be scary at best and terrifying at worst.

And it can be lonely with tenuous links to those back home.

Now, supplant that with the fact you are in that place on false pretences. You now have to channel all of the above and find a degree of both bravado and confidence, which most times, in reality, you don’t have.

Easy, you say, to write about, because you’re not really there, so you can be whatever you want, do whatever you want.

The problem is, it still has to be believable.

So we’re starting with a character that has a job to do, preferably to be on his own so he doesn’t have to be responsible for anyone he’s working with and can use any or all means available to get the job done.

Still not a difficult portrayal.

Quite often there’s no need to complicate the character by adding a background life, which might mean that he has a wife, which is unlikely if he is an agent provocateur, a girlfriend, which is also unlikely, because as a lover, he doesn’t need the distraction or the problem of keeping secrets, which, because of his job, would be a necessity.

But…

Time to add a complication.

His boss sends an assistant, or partner, one that he’s not told about.

And is a woman.

Suddenly his dynamic changes completely, and we need to have some character analysis, like his attitude to partners, and attitude towards women.

The problem is, how the reader is going to perceive this characterization, and that’s where the job becomes harder because on one hand, you want him to be the epitome of the new age man, and on the other, the hard-nosed agent that has no time for building relationships, and particularly because that person is female.

It’s going to be an interesting dynamic, and now that I have thought about, enough to write this, I can see some elements of his character will need to change.

Needless to say, she is going to be a strong female character, so more about her tomorrow.

In a word: Pause

Yes, when you are going at it like a bat out of hell, it might be an idea to take a pause and regroup.

That being a pause as an interruption to an activity.

In music, it’s a mark over a note.

Perhaps it’s a good idea to pause recording a TV show while the ads are on.  Networks don’t like it, but it makes the show make more sense without the distractions of advertisements, sometimes quite inane, or annoying.

What I just said, might give pause to my opposite number in this debate.

Have you been in a conversation, someone says something quite odd, and there’s a pregnant pause?

How did the word pregnant get into the conversation?  That, of course, usually means something significant will follow, but rarely does.  But it can also be a conversation killer where no one says anything.

Is that a wide eye in awe moment?  You did WHAT?

Then there is the word pours, sounds the same but is completely different.

In this case, the man pours water from the bucket on the plants.

Or my brother pours cold water on my plans.  Not literally, but figuratively, making me think twice about whether it would work or not.  Usually not.

Or a confession pours out of a man with a guilty conscience.  AKA sings like a bird.  Don’t you just love these quaint expressions?  It reminded me of a gangster film back in Humphrey Bogart’s day.

It never rains but it pours?  Another expression, when everything goes wrong.  A bit like home renovations really.

Really, it means to flow quickly and in large quantities, ie. rain pours down.

And if that isn’t bad enough, what about paws?

Sounds the same again, but, yes it’s what an animal has as feet, especially cats, dogs, and bears.

One use of it, out of context, of course, is ‘get your paws off me!’

And one rabbit paw might be good luck, but having two rabbit pows, I might win the lottery.

If only….

Short Story writing – don’t try this at home! – Part 7

Putting it all together: the short story

…

I had once said that Grand Central Station, in New York, was large enough you could get lost in it.  Especially if you were from out of town.

I know, I was from out of town, and though I didn’t quite get lost, back then I had to ask directions to go where I needed to.

It was also an awe-inspiring place, and whenever I had a spare moment, usually at lunchtime, I would go there and just soak in the atmosphere. It was large enough to make a list of places to visit, or find, or get a photograph from some of the more obscure places.

Today, I was just there to work off a temper. Things had gone badly at work, and even though I hadn’t done anything wrong, I still felt bad about it.

I came in the 42nd street entrance and went up to the balcony that overlooked the main concourse. A steady stream of people was coming and going, most purposefully, a few were loitering, and several police officers were attempting to move on a vagrant. It was not the first time.

But one person caught my eye, a young woman who had made a circuit of the hall, looked at nearly every destination board, and appeared to be confused. It was the same as I had felt when I first arrived.

Perhaps I could help.

The problem was, a man approaching a woman from out of left field would have a very creepy vibe to it, so it was probably best left alone.

After another half-hour of watching the world go by, I had finally got past the bad mood and headed back to work. I did a wide sweep of the main concourse, perhaps more for the exercise than anything else, and had reached the clock in the center of the concourse when someone turned suddenly, and I crashed into them.

Not badly, like ending up on the floor, but enough for a minor jolt. Of course, it was my fault because I was in another world at that particular moment.

“Oh, I am sorry.” A woman’s voice, very apologetic.

I was momentarily annoyed, then, when I saw who it was, it passed. It was the lost woman I’d seen earlier.

“No. Not your fault, but mine entirely. I have a habit of wandering around with my mind elsewhere.”

Was it fate that we should meet like this?

I noticed she was looking around, much the same as she had before.

“Can I help you?”

“Perhaps you can. There’s supposed to be a bar that dates back to the prohibition era here somewhere. Campbell’s Apartment, or something like that. I was going to ask…”

“Sure. It’s not that hard to find if you know where it is. I’ll take you.”

It made for a good story, especially when I related it to the grandchildren, because the punch line was, “and that’s how I met your grandmother.”

…

© Charles Heath 2022

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 24

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

…

I’ve come to the realization that I’m not going to get this story finished in the allotted time.

In fact, there are aspects of the story that have been bugging me, and it’s been the devil’s own job not to go back and fix some of it up. It’s probably why today’s output is terrible compared to previous days.

What I have done, as elements of the previous part of the story have had to be changed so that what happens later makes sense, I have a copious quantity of post-it notes on the desktop to remind me.

And that tells me that the whole project is getting out of hand.

As it stands, at a guestimate, this story is going to finish up over 100,000 words. If I meet the targets I’ve set myself for the rest of the month, that 30th November total should be around 85,000 words.

It’s an achievement in itself, but I’m not happy with the product as it stands. There’s going to be a huge editing blitz next month if I can face it.

As for now, it’s about 2 am and I’m very tired, I’ve just thought of another change that needs to be made, so I’m going to scribble it down and get to bed.

Thank goodness I don’t try to write all my books in a month!