Category: NaNoWriMo

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 3

I have been working on the story, the editor has gone through the first draft several times after I made the changes requested, and some new additional writing – and I’m now working on the suggestions

…

My writing effort for the two days, yesterday and today amounted to about 6,000 words, which by any stretch of the imagination is a good two days.

But, here’s the thing. I went over if briefly yesterday, and reworked about 2,000 words, and then today I looked at the rest.

Yesterday was a bad day for continuity, and I found myself beset with innumerable distractions. Being Good Friday probably had a lot to do with it.

Today, there were also distractions, but not as bad, and at least from the outset, I got to read the words from start to end.

And, yes, they needed a little work, and, yes, I realise we should not be editing, but writing.

Sorry, but not sorry. It had to be done, and now I feel better about it.

Today’s effort amounts to 4,454 words, for a total, so far, of 8,368.

More tomorrow.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 7

…

It’s a slow march to the end of the stay for both of them.  By unspoken agreement, they partake in picnics, walks, and talk about anything other than parting.

And in the end, she alleviates his concerns for her by telling him about a fictitious job that might be available, if only to keep the truth from him.  It’s not fair, but it is better than the alternative.  She also tells him he can write to her.

And at the end, she realizes that on one hand, happiness was an option if she let it happen, and on the other, she had stronger feelings towards him than she should, and should not have let it happen.  It had, and it would have to be dealt with.

His concern that Mrs Mac might be worried about them is not a concern, she tells him that Mrs Mac had been subtly drawing them together with candle-lit meals, subdued lighting and gentle hints.

The fact he tells her he loves her almost breaks her heart. 

They remained together this time in his room that last night, and she had to use every reserve to stop them from making a mistake.

They have to go back to their lives, and maybe one day they could be together again.

…

Henry takes the train back, an early call to return to the ship.  At least he will not have time, at home or elsewhere to reflect on what just happened.

…

When Michelle returns home, we learn exactly who she is and why she left him.  But, after everything, was there a glimmer of a plan that might be her salvation.

…

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 7

…

It’s a slow march to the end of the stay for both of them.  By unspoken agreement, they partake in picnics, walks, and talk about anything other than parting.

And in the end, she alleviates his concerns for her by telling him about a fictitious job that might be available, if only to keep the truth from him.  It’s not fair, but it is better than the alternative.  She also tells him he can write to her.

And at the end, she realizes that on one hand, happiness was an option if she let it happen, and on the other, she had stronger feelings towards him than she should, and should not have let it happen.  It had, and it would have to be dealt with.

His concern that Mrs Mac might be worried about them is not a concern, she tells him that Mrs Mac had been subtly drawing them together with candle-lit meals, subdued lighting and gentle hints.

The fact he tells her he loves her almost breaks her heart. 

They remained together this time in his room that last night, and she had to use every reserve to stop them from making a mistake.

They have to go back to their lives, and maybe one day they could be together again.

…

Henry takes the train back, an early call to return to the ship.  At least he will not have time, at home or elsewhere to reflect on what just happened.

…

When Michelle returns home, we learn exactly who she is and why she left him.  But, after everything, was there a glimmer of a plan that might be her salvation.

…

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 2

I have been working on the story, the editor has gone through the first draft several times after I made the changes requested, and some new additional writing – and I’m now working on the suggestions

…

Writing proceeds apace and the next chapter seems to have gone on a bit longer than I wanted, but that was because I was having fun. The editor’s suggestions brought a whole new light to the story, with the two main characters being together, not exactly by choice, but as the result of circumstances.

I have also been making notes at the same time, of situations that will arise from their being together, and establishing the reasons behind a lot of what happens later.

I have also re-established the timeline with actions that stretch further into the story and wrote a few little sections at the same time because the story was almost writing itself, and in moments like those, I find it best to get it down on paper, no matter how roughly it turns out.

I am also doing a quick edit of this section of writing because it will be most likely two or three chapters, not just one.

Today’s effort amounts to 2,214 words, for a total, so far, of 3,914.

More tomorrow.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 6

…

Of course, it’s too good to be true, and Henry is going to have to steel himself when the holiday comes to an end.

It’s halfway through the holiday, and the conversation veers towards the elephant in the room; parting.

Then…

Michelle takes ill, the ravages of the past still causing her problems that she does not speak about, but requires a doctor’s ministrations, and discretion.

We learn she had been in rehab and left early.  Grim determination is not enough to substitute for doing the time.

She recovers, but Henry knows something is wrong.

Once again out for a drive, Henry is overcoming that painful shyness, and awkwardness in her presence, and she is letting him via the door that is more than ajar.  

After another pleasant dinner, he ‘escorts’ her back to her room, at the other end of the corridor, a metaphorical wall built between them, where she asks, innocently or otherwise, if he’d like to stay.

It’s that proverbial loaded question with a double-edged sword.

He does, and he doesn’t take it any further, afraid of what it might lead to, and disappointment.

But …

They sleep, fully clothed, on her bed.  Another subliminal moment.

…

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 5

…

With the improved weather, they settle into a routine, she is getting comfortable with Henry being around, and he is finally getting out of the shipboard routine, and becoming more relaxed, though still wary of making a mistake.

They go for walks along the beach, and gradually, a form of intimacy takes place, holding hands, at first with gloves on.

Then in a totally unscripted moment from out of left field, they kiss. It just happens ‘in the moment’.  He apologises, and she just smiles.

Given what she has escaped from, it is a sublime moment that gives her the opportunity, against all odds, that it was possible, one day, she could be happy.

It leads to another unscripted moment, but this time a kiss with more meaning behind it.

Henry doesn’t know how to process this event but goes with the flow.  Out of the confines of the town, on a short road trip, they admit they like each other and to not have any expectations that it might go anywhere.

But the ugly truth of her background raises its head with the conversation turning to the future, and Henry puts his foot in it.

As an unexpected result of that feeling he had ruined everything; a hug that, for him, seemed to last a lifetime.

I remember that first kiss, and the moment that led to it, and it left me with butterflies and dread, that eventually it would all fall apart.  It was a passing moment in time, and it taught me one very valuable lesson, leave expectations out of it.  And that flush of first love, there is nothing like it.

…

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 2

I have been working on the story, the editor has gone through the first draft several times after I made the changes requested, and some new additional writing – and I’m now working on the suggestions

…

Writing proceeds apace and the next chapter seems to have gone on a bit longer than I wanted, but that was because I was having fun. The editor’s suggestions brought a whole new light to the story, with the two main characters being together, not exactly by choice, but as the result of circumstances.

I have also been making notes at the same time, of situations that will arise from their being together, and establishing the reasons behind a lot of what happens later.

I have also re-established the timeline with actions that stretch further into the story and wrote a few little sections at the same time because the story was almost writing itself, and in moments like those, I find it best to get it down on paper, no matter how roughly it turns out.

I am also doing a quick edit of this section of writing because it will be most likely two or three chapters, not just one.

Today’s effort amounts to 2,214 words, for a total, so far, of 3,914.

More tomorrow.

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 6

…

Of course, it’s too good to be true, and Henry is going to have to steel himself when the holiday comes to an end.

It’s halfway through the holiday, and the conversation veers towards the elephant in the room; parting.

Then…

Michelle takes ill, the ravages of the past still causing her problems that she does not speak about, but requires a doctor’s ministrations, and discretion.

We learn she had been in rehab and left early.  Grim determination is not enough to substitute for doing the time.

She recovers, but Henry knows something is wrong.

Once again out for a drive, Henry is overcoming that painful shyness, and awkwardness in her presence, and she is letting him via the door that is more than ajar.  

After another pleasant dinner, he ‘escorts’ her back to her room, at the other end of the corridor, a metaphorical wall built between them, where she asks, innocently or otherwise, if he’d like to stay.

It’s that proverbial loaded question with a double-edged sword.

He does, and he doesn’t take it any further, afraid of what it might lead to, and disappointment.

But …

They sleep, fully clothed, on her bed.  Another subliminal moment.

…

The Things We Do For Love – The final editor’s draft – Day 6

…

Of course, it’s too good to be true, and Henry is going to have to steel himself when the holiday comes to an end.

It’s halfway through the holiday, and the conversation veers towards the elephant in the room; parting.

Then…

Michelle takes ill, the ravages of the past still causing her problems that she does not speak about, but requires a doctor’s ministrations, and discretion.

We learn she had been in rehab and left early.  Grim determination is not enough to substitute for doing the time.

She recovers, but Henry knows something is wrong.

Once again out for a drive, Henry is overcoming that painful shyness, and awkwardness in her presence, and she is letting him via the door that is more than ajar.  

After another pleasant dinner, he ‘escorts’ her back to her room, at the other end of the corridor, a metaphorical wall built between them, where she asks, innocently or otherwise, if he’d like to stay.

It’s that proverbial loaded question with a double-edged sword.

He does, and he doesn’t take it any further, afraid of what it might lead to, and disappointment.

But …

They sleep, fully clothed, on her bed.  Another subliminal moment.

…

Mistaken Identity – The Third Editor’s Draft – Day 1

I have been working on the story, the editor has gone through the first draft several times after I made the changes requested, and some new additional writing – and I’m now working on the suggestions

…

It’s a story I’ve often thought about – the notion that you could be mistaken for someone else and that someone else was on the run and wanted by the police.

Of course, finding that first sentence that is going to drag the reader down the rabbit hole of the story to come takes longer than it does to write the first chapter and didn’t survive the editor’s critical eye

But, after a few hours of deliberation, I had to agree with him, and now the game’s afoot.

So, the MC is a travel agent, one who prefers to go on his own tours so that he can truthfully tell his clients what places, hotels, and travel services are really like.

I’ve noticed that when travel writers do reviews, they seem to get different rooms and experiences than us poor travellers, no more noticeable than when we stayed in San Gimignano. The hotel sounded wonderful, and the description of the room overlooking the town square was fantastic. Pity then we were shoved into a small room out the back, overlooking pigeon coops, and a shower that continually broke down.

It’s probably this disappointment that provided some inspiration for the book.

But rather than being a travelogue, I’m adding some mystery, and suspense to make it more readable.