Another excerpt from ‘Betrayal’; a work in progress

My next destination in the quest was the hotel we believed Anne Merriweather had stayed at.

I was, in a sense, flying blind because we had no concrete evidence she had been there, and the message she had left behind didn’t quite name the hotel or where Vladimir was going to take her.

Mindful of the fact that someone might have been following me, I checked to see if the person I’d assumed had followed me to Elizabeth’s apartment was still in place, but I couldn’t see him. Next, I made a mental note of seven different candidates and committed them to memory.

Then I set off to the hotel, hailing a taxi. There was the possibility the cab driver was one of them, but perhaps I was slightly more paranoid than I should be. I’d been watching the queue, and there were two others before me.

The journey took about an hour, during which time I kept an eye out the back to see if anyone had been following us. If anyone was, I couldn’t see them.

I had the cab drop me off a block from the hotel and then spent the next hour doing a complete circuit of the block the hotel was on, checking the front and rear entrances, the cameras in place, and the siting of the driveway into the underground carpark. There was a camera over the entrance, and one we hadn’t checked for footage. I sent a text message to Fritz to look into it.

The hotel lobby was large and busy, which was exactly what you’d want if you wanted to come and go without standing out. It would be different later at night, but I could see her arriving about mid-afternoon, and anonymous among the type of clientele the hotel attracted.

I spent an hour sitting in various positions in the lobby simply observing. I had already ascertained where the elevator lobby for the rooms was, and the elevator down to the car park. Fortunately, it was not ‘guarded’ but there was a steady stream of concierge staff coming and going to the lower levels, and, just from time to time, guests.

Then, when there was a commotion at the front door, what seemed to be a collision of guests and free-wheeling bags, I saw one of the seven potential taggers sitting by the front door. Waiting for me to leave? Or were they wondering why I was spending so much time there?

Taking advantage of that confusion, I picked my moment to head for the elevators that went down to the car park, pressed the down button, and waited.

The was no car on the ground level, so I had to wait, watching, like several others, the guests untangling themselves at the entrance, and an eye on my potential surveillance, still absorbed in the confusion.

The doors to the left car opened, and a concierge stepped out, gave me a quick look, then headed back to his desk. I stepped into the car, pressed the first level down, the level I expected cars to arrive on, and waited what seemed like a long time for the doors to close.

As they did, I was expecting to see a hand poke through the gap, a latecomer. Nothing happened, and I put it down to a television moment.

There were three basement levels, and for a moment, I let my imagination run wild and considered the possibility that there were more levels. Of course, there was no indication on the control panel that there were any other floors, and I’d yet to see anything like it in reality.

With a shake of my head to return to reality, the car arrived, the doors opened, and I stepped out.

A car pulled up, and the driver stepped out, went around to the rear of his car, and pulled out a case. I half expected him to throw me the keys, but the instant glance he gave me told him was not the concierge, and instead brushed past me like I wasn’t there.

He bashed the up button several times impatiently and cursed when the doors didn’t open immediately. Not a happy man.

Another car drove past on its way down to a lower level.

I looked up and saw the CCTV camera, pointing towards the entrance, visible in the distance. A gate that lifted up was just about back in position and then made a clunk when it finally closed. The footage from the camera would not prove much, even if it had been working, because it didn’t cover the life lobby, only in the direction of the car entrance.

The doors to the other elevator car opened, and a man in a suit stepped out.

“Can I help you, sir? You seem lost.”

Security, or something else. “It seems that way. I went to the elevator lobby, got in, and it went down rather than up. I must have been in the wrong place.”

“Lost it is, then, sir.” I could hear the contempt for Americans in his tone. “If you will accompany me, please.”

He put out a hand ready to guide me back into the elevator. I was only too happy to oblige him. There had been a sign near the button panel that said the basement levels were only to be accessed by the guests.

Once inside, he turned a key and pressed the lobby button. The doors closed, and we went up. He stood, facing the door, not speaking. A few seconds later, he was ushering me out to the lobby.

“Now, sir, if you are a guest…”

“Actually, I’m looking for one. She called me and said she would be staying in this hotel and to come down and visit her. I was trying to get to the sixth floor.”

“Good. Let’s go over the the desk and see what we can do for you.”

I followed him over to the reception desk, where he signalled one of the clerks, a young woman who looked and acted very efficiently, and told her of my request, but then remained to oversee the proceeding.

“Name of guest, sir?”

“Merriweather, Anne. I’m her brother, Alexander.” I reached into my coat pocket and pulled out my passport to prove that I was who I said I was. She glanced cursorily at it.

She typed the name into the computer, and then we waited a few seconds while it considered what to output. Then, she said, “That lady is not in the hotel, sir.”

Time to put on my best-confused look. “But she said she would be staying here for the week. I made a special trip to come here to see her.”

Another puzzled look from the clerk, then, “When did she call you?”

An interesting question to ask, and it set off a warning bell in my head. I couldn’t say today, it would have to be the day she was supposedly taken.

“Last Saturday, about four in the afternoon.”

Another look at the screen, then, “It appears she checked out Sunday morning. I’m afraid you have made a trip in vain.”

Indeed, I had. “Was she staying with anyone?”

I just managed to see the warning pass from the suited man to the clerk. I thought he had shown an interest when I mentioned the name, and now I had confirmation. He knew something about her disappearance. The trouble was, he wasn’t going to volunteer any information because he was more than just hotel security.

“No.”

“Odd,” I muttered. “I thought she told me she was staying with a man named Vladimir something or other. I’m not too good at pronouncing those Russian names. Are you sure?”

She didn’t look back at the screen. “Yes.”

“OK, now one thing I do know about staying in hotels is that you are required to ask guests with foreign passports their next destination, just in case they need to be found. Did she say where she was going next?” It was a long shot, but I thought I’d ask.

“Moscow. As I understand it, she lives in Moscow. That was the only address she gave us.”

I smiled. “Thank you. I know where that is. I probably should have gone there first.”

She didn’t answer; she didn’t have to, her expression did that perfectly.

The suited man spoke again, looking at the clerk. “Thank you.” He swivelled back to me. “I’m sorry we can’t help you.”

“No. You have more than you can know.”

“What was your name again, sir, just in case you still cannot find her?”

“Alexander Merriweather. Her brother. And if she is still missing, I will be posting a very large reward. At the moment, you can best contact me via the American Embassy.”

Money is always a great motivator, and that thoughtful expression on his face suggested he gave a moment’s thought to it.

I left him with that offer and left. If anything, the people who were holding her would know she had a brother, that her brother was looking for her, and equally that brother had money.

© Charles Heath – 2018-2025

Writing a book in 365 days – 330

Day 330

Crafting Believable, Powerful Female Protagonists Without Alienating Your Readers

In recent years, the demand for strong, dynamic female protagonists has surged. Audiences are rejecting outdated, passive female characters and instead championing stories where women take the lead. But as writers, how do we create compelling, powerful female heroes without veering into caricature or alienating readers who crave authenticity and relatability? A powerful protagonist isn’t about being the “strongest,” “toughest,” or “most fearless” at all costs. It’s about building a character who feels real—flawed, complex, and driven by something deeper than a checklist of “strong traits.” Here’s how to strike that balance.


1. Power ≠ Perfection: Give Her Flaws

One of the biggest pitfalls in creating “strong” female characters is making them infallible. Perfection is unrelatable. A woman who never doubts herself, never stumbles, and never shows vulnerability is not powerful—she’s a robot.

Take Daenerys Targaryen (Game of Thrones) as an example. Her early portrayal as the “Mother of Dragons,” a noble, idealistic leader, made her relatable. Her later arc, while controversial, was memorable because it humanized her: her rage, her mistakes, and the consequences of her ambition made her a complex character, not just a “warrior queen.”

The lesson: Strength is not the absence of weakness. A powerful female protagonist should struggle with fears, insecurities, or ethical dilemmas. Let her fail. Let her grow. Imperfection makes her human.


2. Motivate Her Power: What Does She Want?

Why is she powerful? What drives her? A compelling protagonist doesn’t exist in a vacuum; her strengths and flaws should serve her goals and the story’s stakes.

Consider Hermione Granger (Harry Potter). Her intelligence is not just a trait—it’s the engine of her character. She’s driven by a love of learning, a desire to prove herself, and a fierce loyalty to her friends. Her “strength” is in how she uses her knowledge, not just in being “smarter than everyone else.”

The lesson: Give her a clear, grounded motivation. Whether it’s protecting her family, righting a wrong, or proving her worth, her power should be deeply tied to her emotional core.


3. Balance Strength With Relatability

A powerful protagonist doesn’t have to be a one-woman army. Her strength can be emotional, intellectual, or moral. It just needs to resonate with her world and the challenges she faces.

For instance, Eleanor Shellstrop (The Good Place) is powerful in her wit, resilience, and ability to connect with others—even when she’s flawed, selfish, or insecure. Her journey from self-centeredness to heroism is far more engaging than if she’d been written as a “perfect” woman from the start.

The lesson: Let her power reflect the story’s context. In a thriller, it might be resourcefulness under pressure. In a romance, it might be emotional honesty. In a fantasy, it might be leadership or magical skill.


4. Avoid the “Manhater” Trap

A powerful female character doesn’t need to prove her strength by rejecting or defying men. In fact, this trope often backfires, reducing her to a caricature of feminism. A character who is simply “angry at men” without deeper motivation is not empowering—she’s unappealing.

Take Pepper Potts (Iron Man) as a contrast. She’s a smart, capable leader who runs a global tech empire, but her relationship with Tony Stark isn’t a subplot about “dominating men” or “rejecting them.” She’s focused on her own growth and doing the right thing, which is far more compelling.

The lesson: Her relationships with other characters (including men) should serve the story, not act as a crutch for “her being strong.” Let her have autonomy and agency separate from gender dynamics.


5. Give Her a Unique Voice and Perspective

Powerful protagonists often have strong wills, but their personalities need to be distinctive and nuanced. A “strong” character isn’t just loud or bold—they might be quiet, observant, or introspective. Their voice should reflect who they are.

Consider Rey (Star Wars: The Force Awakens). Her strength isn’t just in wielding a lightsaber—it’s in her selflessness, perseverance, and quiet determination to do good in a galaxy full of chaos. Her journey resonates because it’s not about brute force, but about heart.

The lesson: Let her personality shine. Is she a strategic thinker, a passionate advocate, or a pragmatic problem-solver? Her voice should reflect this, making her memorable without being performative.


6. Context Matters: Tailor Her Power to the Setting

A powerful female protagonist should be shaped by her world. In a medieval fantasy, her strength might be in diplomacy or magic. In a modern workplace drama, it might be in negotiation or resilience under pressure.

Take Katsa (Graceling), whose physical strength is both a gift and a curse in a rigid, hierarchical society. Her power is tied to her culture’s values and prejudices, making her struggle universal.

The lesson: Research and build her power around her environment. How does her strength interact with the world’s rules, norms, and conflicts?


The Key to Universal Appeal: Depth Over Stereotype

A powerful female protagonist isn’t defined by how many obstacles she “overcomes” or how many people she outmaneuvers. It’s about how deeply readers connect with her humanity. Avoid reducing her to a symbol of “strength”; instead, make her a real person with relatable struggles, unique goals, and a voice that lingers long after the story ends.

By grounding her in authenticity, you’ll create a character who isn’t just “strong”—they’re unforgettable.

What makes a female protagonist memorable to you? Share your favourites in the comments!


“Sunday in New York”, a romantic adventure that’s not a walk in the park!

“Sunday in New York” is ultimately a story about trust, and what happens when a marriage is stretched to its limits.

When Harry Steele attends a lunch with his manager, Barclay, to discuss a promotion that any junior executive would accept in a heartbeat, it is the fact his wife, Alison, who previously professed her reservations about Barclay, also agreed to attend, that casts a small element of doubt in his mind.

From that moment, his life, in the company, in deciding what to do, his marriage, his very life, spirals out of control.

There is no one big factor that can prove Harry’s worst fears, that his marriage is over, just a number of small, interconnecting events, when piled on top of each other, points to a cataclysmic end to everything he had believed in.

Trust is lost firstly in his best friend and mentor, Andy, who only hints of impending disaster, Sasha, a woman whom he saved, and who appears to have motives of her own, and then in his wife, Alison, as he discovered piece by piece damning evidence she is about to leave him for another man.

Can we trust what we see with our eyes or trust what we hear?

Haven’t we all jumped to conclusions at least once in our lives?

Can Alison, a woman whose self-belief and confidence is about to be put to the ultimate test, find a way of proving their relationship is as strong as it has ever been?

As they say in the classics, read on!

Purchase:

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“Echoes From The Past”, the past doesn’t necessarily stay there


What happens when your past finally catches up with you?

Christmas is just around the corner, a time to be with family. For Will Mason, an orphan since he was fourteen, it is a time for reflection on what his life could have been, and what it could be.

Until a chance encounter brings back to life the reasons for his twenty years of self-imposed exile from a life only normal people could have. From that moment Will’s life slowly starts to unravel and it’s obvious to him it’s time to move on.

This time, however, there is more at stake.

Will has broken his number one rule, don’t get involved.

With his nemesis, Eddie Jamieson, suddenly within reach, and a blossoming relationship with an office colleague, Maria, about to change everything, Will has to make a choice. Quietly leave, or finally, make a stand.

But as Will soon discovers, when other people are involved there is going to be terrible consequences no matter what choice he makes.

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Third son of a Duke – The research behind the story – 12

All stories require some form of research, quite often to place a character in a place at a particular time, especially if it is in a historical context. This series will take you through what it was like in 1914 through 1916.

The Red Line to the Pyramids: Logistics and Experience of Troop Movement from Port Said to Cairo Camps, Mid-1915

I. Strategic Context: Egypt as the Entrepôt of Empire in Mid-1915

The logistical chain supporting British and Imperial forces in the Middle Eastern Theatre during the First World War hinged entirely on the operational capacity of Egypt. By mid-1915, following the initial influx of Australian and New Zealand forces in late 1914, Egypt had solidified its position as the critical staging ground for Allied operations.1 General Sir John Maxwell, with headquarters in Cairo, administered martial law across the entire region, encompassing the Suez Canal and the Egyptian Delta.2 Meanwhile, the complex command structure included the Levant Base, responsible for administering forces destined for Gallipoli and Mesopotamia, with its headquarters located in Alexandria.2

The Dual Pressures on Infrastructure

Mid-1915 represented a period of immense strain on Egyptian infrastructure due to simultaneous military requirements. Firstly, the Suez Canal remained a major defensive priority. Although the Ottoman raid on the Canal had been repelled in January and February 1915, the threat necessitated maintaining heavy garrisons of British and Indian troops along its entire length, supported by continuous supply lines.3 Secondly, the ongoing, brutal Gallipoli campaign required constant reinforcement, casualty rotation, and supply shipment, all coordinated from Egypt by the Mediterranean Expeditionary Force (MEF).1

The continuous rotation of troops and materials through Egyptian ports meant that the rail and road networks were inherently militarised. The critical logistical determination governing the movement of a newly arrived soldier from Port Said toward Cairo was logistical prioritisation. Because the Ottoman threat had only recently receded from the Canal front, military doctrine dictated that forward-area supply and reinforcement movements—carrying ammunition, food, and urgent personnel to the Canal Zone near Ismailia—always took precedence over troop trains moving personnel back toward the relative safety of the Cairo training camps.7 This operational necessity inevitably introduced friction and delays into the transfer schedule for new arrivals.

II. Phase 1: Arrival and Initial Processing at Port Said

Port Said, strategically situated at the northern entrance of the Suez Canal, served as one of the two primary Egyptian ports (the other being Alexandria) utilised by the British war machine. It was a vital gateway for disembarking personnel, horses, guns, and general supplies destined for the various Egyptian camps and for onward movement to the Dardanelles and other theatres 3

The Disembarkation Sequence: Ship-to-Shore Transfer

The scale of military transport far exceeded the existing peacetime commercial capacity of the port infrastructure. Evidence indicates that large troopships frequently dropped anchor offshore, often “about five miles from shore”.8 Direct disembarkation was typically not possible for large numbers of troops simultaneously, necessitating a logistical bottleneck: the transfer of men and matériel from the deep-draught transports to the quayside using smaller craft.

This transfer relied heavily on specialised vessels, primarily lighters, which are flat-bottomed barges essential for moving troops and stores between ship and shore.9 This included purpose-built craft, such as the specialised “X-lighters” designed initially for the Gallipoli campaign, which were later dispersed throughout the Mediterranean theatre, including Egypt.10 The reliance on lighters confirms a structural limitation in the port’s ability to handle the enormous volume of massed transports and heavy equipment arriving daily. Disembarking an entire troopship in this manner was a slow, multi-hour process that formed the soldier’s uncomfortable introduction to the theatre, adding significant time to the overall journey (estimated between 4 to 12 hours depending on port congestion and troop readiness).9

Marshalling and Initial Control

Upon reaching the quayside, troops were immediately subject to military authority and directed to temporary marshalling areas. An army camp, likely used by the Australian Light Horse, was known to be established on the edge of Port Said town, indicating an immediate holding facility near the railhead.11 The city itself, a thriving commercial hub adjacent to the Canal, was also a bustling environment, surrounded by local traders and “Side Shows” hoping to profit from the soldiers.12

The immediate experience for the soldier included stringent military oversight, particularly regarding health. By early 1915, the prevalence of venereal disease (VD) among Imperial troops was alarming commanders, leading to dedicated hospital wards and strict quarantine measures.13 Newly arrived soldiers received explicit lectures on hygiene and were warned that specific areas of the city were designated “out of bounds”.13 This imposition of social control reflected the immediate institutional concern about maintaining troop fitness amidst the moral and economic environment of Port Said, which, like other major Egyptian cities, featured restricted red-light districts.1

Once processed, the personnel, perhaps still on foot or utilising local short-haul vehicles, were marched or ferried the short distance to the Egyptian State Railways (ESR) terminus in Port Said, ready for the main leg of the journey toward Cairo.14

III. Phase 2: The Strained Corridor—Rail Transit to Cairo

The primary mode of transport from the Canal Zone cities to the interior of the Nile Delta was the Egyptian State Railways (ESR). The military relied heavily on this network, with British staff coordinating closely with ESR officials, whose dedication was noted by senior officers.15

The Critical Rail Route and Operational Constraints

The relevant rail route from Port Said did not run directly to Cairo, but followed a critical logistical corridor: it ran south along the west bank of the Suez Canal, passing through Qantara and linking up at Ismaïlia—a major military hub containing Moascar Camp and Sector II defence headquarters 3—before heading west across the desert plateau to Cairo.2 This line was indispensable for supporting the Suez Canal defences and relied on the adjacent Sweet Water Canal for vital steam engine water stops and supply points, underscoring its dual strategic importance.2

The logistical prioritisation in mid-1915 meant that the single railway line linking Cairo to the Canal Zone was perpetually strained. The movement of troops toward the training areas was secondary to the needs of the active front. Freight trains carrying military supplies, equipment, and ammunition for the Canal defence and forward deployment received priority right-of-way.7 This condition caused troop trains carrying personnel to be frequently delayed, shunted, or forced to wait for priority clearances, particularly around congested hubs like Ismaïlia, leading to significantly extended transit times compared to civilian schedules. The management and operation of this singular, vital infrastructure artery were thus central to the British colonial war administration, placing military needs, and not passenger comfort, first.

The total rail distance from Port Said to Cairo is approximately 191 kilometres.17 Given the operational friction, the frequent stops, and the subordination to supply logistics, the troop train journey would have been protracted, analytically estimated to take between 6 to 10 hours from the railhead to Cairo Central Station.

The Human Experience of Wartime Rail Transit

The physical environment of the mid-1915 transit was arguably the most immediate and severe challenge faced by the soldiers. Mid-summer temperatures in Egypt frequently exceeded $40^\circ\mathrm{C}$.18 Soldiers noted that the days were “invariable bright and warm under the influence of the sun that scorches the skins,” warning that discarding a hat for even a moment risked “being sent to hospital with a raging headache”.19

Troops traveled long distances in basic carriages, exposed to the unrelenting heat, dust, and dehydration.20 The physical punishment of the journey was severe, often causing troops to arrive in Cairo already exhausted, increasing their vulnerability to various camp diseases.21 The strategic assessment of travel conditions often recommended that military columns sleep during the day and travel at night to mitigate the heat, a practice that might have been applied to troop train scheduling depending on the urgency of movement.18

The journey also provided a stark visual of the militarised landscape, as the train traversed defence sectors along the Canal, guarded by Indian lancers and protected by armoured trains.4 This transit solidified the soldier’s understanding that they were operating in a highly protected, yet still threatened, combat zone adjacent to the front line.

Table 1 summarises the key logistical phases and the expected duration of the transfer under mid-1915 wartime conditions.

Table 1: Logistical Phases and Estimated Timeframe (Port Said to Mena Camp)

Phase of TransitLikely Transport MethodKey Activity/ChallengeApprox. Duration (Mid-1915)
Ship-to-ShoreLighters/TugsDisembarkation of troops/stores, initial processing at quay.4 to 12 hours 8
Port Said MarshallingFoot/Local TransportAdministrative checks, waiting for rail slot and clearance.2 to 6 hours 11
Port Said to Cairo CentralEgyptian State Railway (ESR) Troop Train (191km)Slower transit; delays due to Canal supply priority and heat.6 to 10 hours 2
Cairo Central to Mena CampExtended Tramway LineUrban transit and suburban extension to Giza camp.1 to 2 hours 22
Total Transfer TimeN/AExcluding major external logistical/scheduling delays13 to 30+ hours

IV. Phase 3: Cairo Central Station and the Final Mile to Training Camp

The arrival point for the heavy rail journey was Cairo Central Station.24 From here, the soldiers, typically arriving as large unit groups, had to undertake the final stage of the journey to the massive training facilities located on the outskirts of the city.

Primary Destination: Mena Camp

Mena Camp, situated approximately 10 miles (16 kilometers) west of the center of Cairo, near the Giza Pyramids and the Sphinx, was the principal staging and training camp utilized by the Australian and New Zealand Army Corps (ANZAC) and other Imperial forces in 1915.13 The camp was chosen for its vast space, capable of accommodating unlimited troops for maneuvers, with the Pyramids providing a distinctly Egyptian backdrop.25 At its peak, Mena hosted around 25,000 soldiers.13

The Logistical Apex: The Tramway Solution

The movement of thousands of men and their light equipment from the Central Railway Station to Mena Camp utilised an ingenious adaptation of civilian infrastructure: the Cairo tramway system. In late 1914 and early 1915, following the rapid decision to reroute troops from England to Egypt due to overcrowded British camps 13, British staff in Egypt set contractors to work specifically extending the civilian tramlines directly to the prospective Mena depot.23

This extension was a demonstration of the improvisational militarisation of civilian infrastructure. The use of an electric tramway, rather than attempting to mobilise sufficient motor transport or relying solely on marching columns, provided a high-volume, cost-effective, and fixed-route system necessary to link the rail terminal directly to the remote desert camp.23 Historical accounts confirm that troops arriving at Cairo Station were transferred to Mena Camp “by tram”.22 This mass transit solution allowed the military command to maintain rapid deployment capacity from the heart of the city to the training grounds near Giza.

The final leg of the journey offered a sharp cultural contrast. The tram would have traveled through the dense, crowded, cosmopolitan districts of Cairo before suddenly giving way to the vast, dusty expanse of the desert surrounding the pyramids.

Secondary Destinations

While Mena was the primary training camp near Cairo in 1915, other large British military sites were also critical logistical nodes. For instance, the Heliopolis Camp, located in the eastern suburbs, was home to the Royal Flying Corps and included No. 1 Australian General Hospital, which requisitioned the large Heliopolis Palace Hotel.6 Heliopolis, too, was served by the city’s extensive electric tram system, confirming the tram network’s overarching role in troop distribution across the greater Cairo area.27

V. The Experience of Arrival: Climate, Discipline, and Social Friction

The soldier arriving at a Cairo camp in mid-1915 entered a volatile environment defined by extremes of climate and social tension.

Environmental Acclimatisation and Health Crisis

Mid-1915 represented the worst possible time for acclimatisation. The combination of intense heat, dry desert dust, and poor sanitation fostered an environment where disease flourished. Soldiers experienced physical exhaustion from the heat, and training was often strenuous—eight hours a day, six days a week, marching in heavy gear across the desert sands.6 Personal accounts from the period describe troops suffering from dysentery (“the squirts”) and heat-related illnesses, noting that the combination of heat and flies (present “in millions”) guaranteed “a good crop of disease”.29 Even at Mena, the 300-bed stationary hospital was quickly overwhelmed with venereal patients by early 1915.13 Water supply, though addressed by the rapid laying of pipes to the camps, remained a persistent logistical priority across the desert campaigns.21

Discipline and the Crisis of the “Wazzer”

For the newly arrived soldier, the cultural experience of Cairo was immediately juxtaposed with strict military control. Cairo was notorious among commanders for being a place where men were “subjected to more terrible temptations” than anywhere else, leading to efforts by organisations like the YMCA to establish recreation huts near major tram stops to distract soldiers from “immoral pursuits”.31

This conflict between troop escapism and military attempts at control peaked precisely during the mid-1915 period. The infamous “Battles of the Wazzer”—violent clashes between Australian troops and local residents/business owners in the Wagh el-Birka red-light district—occurred specifically in May and June 1915.1 This period of civil-military volatility required constant security. Military Police (picquets) patrolled the slums at night, arresting drunken men and those overstaying leave.12

The underlying tension was exacerbated by cultural mistrust. Imperial troops, particularly Australians, often viewed local Egyptians (“Gyppos”) as “devious and conniving,” reinforcing an authoritarian separation.13 The social friction was compounded by the institutional management of vice, including the army’s setting up of specific brothels under the Medical Corps’ oversight to try and control the VD epidemic.13

The convergence of the extreme physical hardship imposed by the mid-summer heat and the lack of traditional military discipline among certain Imperial troops created a volatile psychological environment that exploded into civil unrest. The climate acted as a pressure multiplier, thinning patience and heightening the need for escapism among troops already facing disease and exhaustion, which contributed directly to the violence witnessed in the city during May and June of 1915.

Table 2 outlines the simultaneous environmental and social challenges faced by troops completing the transit in mid-1915.

Table 2: Environmental and Social Impediments to Transit (Mid-1915)

Impediment CategorySpecific ChallengeOperational/Experiential Impact
ClimateExtreme Heat ($40^\circ\mathrm{C}$+) and DustPhysical exhaustion, heat stroke, reliance on night movement, rapid dehydration 2
HealthWidespread Disease (VD, Dysentery)Dedicated hospital capacity overflow; restricted leave areas; need for strict hygiene briefings 13
Social Friction“Battles of the Wazzer” (May/June 1915)Volatile urban environment; strict MP patrols necessary; high risk of confrontation 1
Logistical PrioritySupply Strain on ESRDelays in troop trains as rail prioritised movements of equipment and supplies to the Suez Canal defence zone 7

VI. Summary and Expert Conclusion

The transit of a soldier from a troopship arriving at Port Said to a British army camp near Cairo, such as Mena Camp, in mid-1915 was a multi-modal logistical operation spanning over 13 to 30 hours, shaped profoundly by wartime necessity and climate.

The initial phase involved the necessary inefficiency of ship-to-shore movement, relying on lighters due to the port’s structural constraints and congestion. The second phase, the rail journey, was defined by the strategic priority placed on securing the Suez Canal, ensuring that troop trains were inherently secondary to supply movements, resulting in a slow, punishing passage across the desert under extreme heat. Finally, the last mile showcased the ingenuity of the British logistical corps, which successfully militarised existing civilian infrastructure by rapidly extending the Cairo tramway system to provide high-volume personnel transport directly from the rail terminus to the vast training grounds outside the city.

The overall effectiveness of the British logistical system—its capacity to rapidly adapt to the unanticipated deployment to Egypt and incorporate the ESR and city tramways—was impressive. However, this efficiency came at a direct cost to the individual soldier. The harsh mid-summer climate, combined with basic accommodations, led to immediate and high rates of disease and exhaustion. Furthermore, the cultural dislocation and the institutional failure to effectively manage troop leisure time contributed directly to heightened social friction, culminating in significant clashes like the “Battles of the Wazzer.” The journey to camp, therefore, served not merely as a transfer, but as a jarring, high-stress initiation into the unique physical and social dynamics of the Egyptian theatre, preparing the soldier for the imminent, brutal reality of combat operations.

“Bloody hell…” – a short story

The cell phone’s insistent and shrill ring dragged my mind away from the crossword, and after a fairly mild curse, I picked it up.

Sidney, my brother.  Odd he was calling me at this hour of the night.

“What,” I barked into the microphone.

“That’s no way to speak to your baby brother.”  His smooth tones rarely reached a screaming point, which was often the reason why mine did.

And who calls the younger brother ‘baby’ brother these days?

“What do you want?”

A hesitation.  He was in trouble again; I could feel it.

“Can you come down to the bar?  I seem to have left my wallet at home.”  Sheepish, and just enough to stop me from yelling at him.  It was not the first time, nor would it be the last.

“I told you the last time was the last time.”

“Just this once, please?”

I shook my head.  That was probably my biggest fault, giving in to him.  After our mother had died, and our father had to work, it was left to me to bring him up.  He was going to be the death of me yet.  “Where?”

“The usual place.”

I was surprised because the last I’d heard they’d banned him from going in there.  It was only a twenty-minute walk from my apartment, but, late at night, and in winter, there was snow in the air.  And the odd snowflake falling, a prelude to much worse.

About a hundred yards from the bar I had a shiver go down my spine.  I’d not had that for a long time, not since school, and the trouble with Wiley, the school bully.  Wiley had graduated to the local thug, done a few stints in jail, and last I heard he had been sent down for a few years for an assault.

I stopped and took a moment.  Perhaps karma was trying to tell me something.

I shrugged.  Just in my imagination.  I reached the door, took a moment then went in.  He was standing by the bat looking a little apprehensive.  He was in more trouble than just not paying his bar bill.

Close up I could see the fear in his expression.  “Bloody hell, Sid, what have you done now?”

“A problem that he insists his older brother would be happy to pay for.”

I knew that voice and felt instant dread.

Wiley.

In the flesh, and not looking very happy at all.

© Charles Heath 2020-2021

Writing a book in 365 days – 329

Day 329

Tell a Dream, Lose a Reader – Why Your Aspirational Stories May Be Turning Audiences Away (And How to Fix It)

“If you can’t explain it simply, you haven’t understood it well enough.” – Albert Einstein

In the world of blogging, the line between “inspiring” and “incomprehensible” is razor‑thin. You’ve probably heard the old adage: “Tell a dream, lose a reader.” It’s a warning, not a destiny. In this post we’ll unpack why lofty, abstract storytelling can actually drive readers away, and we’ll give you a concrete roadmap to keep those dreams alive and keep your audience glued to the page.


1. The Allure of the “Dream” Narrative

Every great brand, influencer, or thought‑leader has a vision—a big picture that fuels their work. Think of Elon Musk’s Mars colony, Simon Sinek’s “Start With Why,” or a startup’s promise to “revolutionize the way people travel.”

These dreams:

  • Create emotional resonance – they tap into hopes, fears, and aspirations.
  • Differentiate the voice – a compelling vision makes you stand out in a sea of generic how‑tos.
  • Provide long‑term direction – they guide content strategy, product roadmaps, and community building.

So why would sharing a dream ever backfire?


2. When Dreams Become “Dream‑Noise”

Dream‑Heavy SymptomWhy It Turns Readers Off
Vague, lofty language (e.g., “We aim to reshape humanity”)Readers can’t picture the concrete outcome.
All‑talk, no‑action (no steps, no proof)The audience feels you’re all hype, no substance.
Ignoring the audience’s needs (talking about your mission without linking to their problems)Readers wonder, “What’s in it for me?”
Over‑long, meandering storiesAttention spans are limited; the main point gets lost.
Lack of relatable examplesPeople connect with stories they can see themselves in.

These pitfalls cause a cognitive overload: the brain wants a clear mental model, not a cloud of abstract promises. When that model is missing, the reader disengages—often before the first paragraph ends.


3. The Science Behind the Drop‑Off

  • Attention Span: Studies show the average online reader spends only 8‑10 seconds scanning a piece before deciding to stay or leave.
  • Cognitive Fluency: The brain prefers information that’s easy to process. When you bombard readers with nebulous concepts, they experience mental friction and instinctively retreat.
  • Emotional Alignment: Readers stay when they feel the story resonates with their own goals. A dream that feels distant creates an emotional gap—and gaps drive exits.

4. Turning Dream‑Talk Into Reader‑Retention Gold

Below is a step‑by‑step framework that lets you share your grand vision without losing traction.

Step 1: Anchor the Dream in a Tangible Problem

Instead of: “We’ll change the way the world thinks about sustainability.”
Try: “Every year, 1.2 billion tons of plastic end up in oceans. Our platform gives brands a zero‑waste packaging solution that cuts that number by 30 % within two years.”

Why it works: Readers instantly see the stakes and how your dream addresses a real pain point.

Step 2: Break the Vision into Three Concrete Milestones

MilestoneTimeframeReader Benefit
Prototype LaunchQ2 2025Early adopters get 20 % discount & co‑design input
Beta ScalingQ4 2025Access to analytics dashboards to track waste reduction
Full Roll‑outQ2 2026Certification as a “Zero‑Waste Partner” for marketing

Why it works: Short, numbered milestones make the journey digestible and create mini‑wins that keep readers invested.

Step 3: Weave a Relatable Human Story

  • Introduce a protagonist (real or fictional) who embodies the reader.
  • Show their struggle with the problem.
  • Demonstrate how the solution (your dream) changes their life in measurable terms.

Example: “When Maya, a boutique owner in Austin, switched to our biodegradable sleeves, she cut packaging costs by $3,200 in six months and saw a 12 % lift in repeat customers.”

Step 4: Use Concrete Data & Social Proof

  • Include stats, testimonials, or case studies that prove the dream is already moving.
  • Visuals (infographics, before/after photos) reduce abstraction and boost credibility.

Step 5: End With a Clear Call‑to‑Action (CTA) Aligned to the Dream

  • “Join our pilot program and be among the first to showcase a waste‑free storefront.”
  • “Download the free roadmap that walks you through the first step of going plastic‑free.”

Why it works: The CTA transforms inspiration into a next step—the bridge from dream to action.


5. Real‑World Examples: Dream‑Talk Done Right

BrandDream StatementHow They Ground ItResult
Patagonia“We’re in business to save our home planet.”Constantly shares specific initiatives (e.g., 1% for the Planet, repair kits, supply‑chain transparency).Loyal community of 4M+ activists; consistent sales growth.
Airbnb“Belong anywhere.”Provides concrete stories of hosts and guests, clear guidelines for community standards, and data on economic impact.150 M+ users, $5B+ annual revenue.
Tesla“Accelerate the world’s transition to sustainable energy.”Regularly releases measurable milestones (Model 3 production numbers, Supercharger network expansion).Valuation > $1 trillion, massive media buzz.

Notice how each brand starts with a bold dream, but immediately anchors it in specific, relatable, and data‑driven details. The dream becomes a promise you can see, feel, and act upon.


6. Quick Checklist: Is Your Dream Story Reader‑Friendly?

  •  Problem‑First – Do you start with the reader’s pain point?
  •  Three‑Step Roadmap – Is the vision broken into digestible milestones?
  •  Human Hook – Is there a relatable protagonist?
  •  Concrete Evidence – Do you back up claims with data or testimonials?
  •  Clear CTA – Does the post end with a next step tied to the dream?

If you tick four or more boxes, you’re on the right track. If not, it’s time to rewrite.


7. Takeaway: Dream Boldly, Write Clearly

Your audience craves big ideas—but only when those ideas are presented in a way that feels real, relevant, and actionable. The mantra becomes:

“Tell a dream, keep the reader.”

By anchoring ambition in concrete problems, breaking it into bite‑size milestones, and wrapping it in human stories, you turn a lofty vision into a magnetic narrative that inspires and converts.


Ready to Test This On Your Next Post?

  1. Draft your dream statement.
  2. Apply the five‑step framework above.
  3. Run a quick A/B test: original vs. revised version.
  4. Measure dwell time, scroll depth, and CTA clicks.

Share your results in the comments—let’s learn from each other’s journeys toward dreaming and delivering.

Happy writing, and may your dreams never lose a reader again!

What I learned about writing – It often feels like you are on a merry-go-round

Self-published authors are fully aware that perhaps the easiest part of the writing journey is the actual writing.  Well, compared to the marketing aspect I believe it is.

I have read a lot of articles, suggestions and tips and tricks to market the book to the reading public.  It is, to say the least, a lot harder to market eBooks than perhaps their hard or paper-covered relatives.

This is despite the millions of eReaders out there.

Then there is that other fickle part of the publishing cycle, the need for reviews.

Proper reviews of course.

As we are learning, reviews can be bought, and in more ways than one.  What happened to finding writers of the same genre and offering to buy one copy and write a review in return for a buy one copy and write a review.

I’ve noticed that all the current best selling novelists do the same for their fellow novelists though I guess when you get to be a best-seller, you might not have to buy a copy, so I can only dream of attaining such lofty heights in the publishing world.

But until I reach such rarefied air, I guess I have to figure out how to appeal to my fellow writers, and, of course, hope that my work is good enough.

It might be a start in getting through that difficult cycle, more reviews means more sales, etc.  And getting those first sales and reviews  …

Therein lies the conundrum.  It is a question of paying for advertising or working it out for ourselves.  I guess if I were to get more sales, I could afford the advertising … yes, back on the merry-go-round!

And yet, the harder the road, the more I enjoy what I do.  It is exhilarating while writing, it is a joy to finish the first draft, it is an accomplishment when it is published, but when you sell that first book, well, there is no other feeling like it.

I am inspired.

Now as for that advertisement and where to post it…

An excerpt from “What Sets Us Apart”, a mystery with a twist

See the excerpt from the story below, just a taste of what’s in store…

http://amzn.to/2Eryfth

whatsetscover

McCallister was old school, a man who would most likely fit in perfectly campaigning on the battlefields of Europe during the Second World War. He’d been like a fish out of water in the army, post-Falklands, and while he retired a hero, he still felt he’d more to give.

He’d applied and was accepted as head of a SWAT team, and, watching him now as he and his men disembarked from the truck in almost military precision, a look passed between Annette, the police liaison officer, and I that said she’d seen it all before. I know I had.

There was a one in four chance his team would be selected for this operation, and she had been hoping it would be one of the other three. While waiting for them to arrive she filled me in on the various teams. His was the least co-operative, and the more likely to make ad-hoc decisions rather than adhere to the plan, or any orders that may come from the officer in charge.

This, she said quite bluntly, was going to end badly.

I still had no idea why Prendergast instructed me to attend the scene of what looked to be a normal domestic operation, but as the nominated expert in the field in these types of situations, it was fairly clear he wasn’t taking any chances. It was always a matter of opinion between us, and generally I lost.

In this case, it was an anonymous report identifying what the authorities believed were explosives in one of the dockside sheds where explosives were not supposed to be.

The only reason why the report was given any credence was the man, while not identifying himself by name, said he’d been an explosive expert once and recognized the boxes. That could mean anything, but the Chief Constable was a cautious man.

With his men settled and preparing their weapons, McCallister came over to the command post, not much more than the SUV my liaison and I arrived in, with weapons, bulletproof vests, and rolls of tape to cordon off the area afterward. We both had coffee, steaming in the cold early morning air. Dawn was slowly approaching and although rain had been forecast it had yet to arrive.

A man by the name of Benson was in charge. He too had groaned when he saw McCallister.

“A fine morning for it.” McCallister was the only enthusiastic one here.

He didn’t say what ‘it’ was, but I thought it might eventually be mayhem.

“Let’s hope the rain stays away. It’s going to be difficult enough without it,” Benson said, rubbing his hands together. We had been waiting for the SWAT team to arrive, and another team to take up their position under the wharf, and who was in the final stages of securing their position.

While we were waiting we drew up the plan. I’d go in first to check on what we were dealing with, and what type of explosives. The SWAT team, in the meantime, were to ensure all the exits to the shed were covered. When I gave the signal, they were to enter and secure the building. We were not expecting anyone inside or out, and no movement had been detected in the last hour since our arrival and deployment.

“What’s the current situation?”

“I’ve got eyes on the building, and a team coming in from the waterside, underneath. Its slow progress, but they’re nearly there. Once they’re in place, we’re sending McKenzie in.”

He looked in my direction.

“With due respect sir, shouldn’t it be one of us?” McCallister glared at me with the contempt that only a decorated military officer could.

“No. I have orders from above, much higher than I care to argue with, so, McCallister, no gung-ho heroics for the moment. Just be ready to move on my command, and make sure you have three teams at the exit points, ready to secure the building.”

McCallister opened his mouth, no doubt to question those orders, but instead closed it again. “Yes sir,” he muttered and turned away heading back to his men.

“You’re not going to have much time before he storms the battlements,” Benson quietly said to me, a hint of exasperation in his tone. “I’m dreading the paperwork.”

It was exactly what my liaison officer said when she saw McCallister arriving.

The water team sent their ‘in position’ signal, and we were ready to go.

In the hour or so we’d been on site nothing had stirred, no arrivals, no departures, and no sign anyone was inside, but that didn’t mean we were alone. Nor did it mean I was going to walk in and see immediately what was going on. If it was a cache of explosives then it was possible the building was booby-trapped in any number of ways, there could be sentries or guards, and they had eyes on us, or it might be a false alarm.

I was hoping for the latter.

I put on the bulletproof vest, thinking it was a poor substitute for full battle armor against an exploding bomb, but we were still treating this as a ‘suspected’ case. I noticed my liaison officer was pulling on her bulletproof vest too.

“You don’t have to go. This is my party, not yours,” I said.

“The Chief Constable told me to stick to you like glue, sir.”

I looked at Benson. “Talk some sense into her please, this is not a kindergarten outing.”

He shrugged. Seeing McCallister had taken all the fight out of him. “Orders are orders. If that’s what the Chief Constable requested …”

Madness. I glared at her, and she gave me a wan smile. “Stay behind me then, and don’t do anything stupid.”

“Believe me, I won’t be.” She pulled out and checked her weapon, chambering the first round. It made a reassuring sound.

Suited up, weapons readied, a last sip of the coffee in a stomach that was already churning from nerves and tension, I looked at the target, one hundred yards distant and thought it was going to be the longest hundred yards I’d ever traversed. At least for this week.

A swirling mist rolled in and caused a slight change in plans.

Because the front of the buildings was constantly illuminated by large overhead arc lamps, my intention had been to approach the building from the rear where there was less light and more cover. Despite the lack of movement, if there were explosives in that building, there’d be ‘enemy’ surveillance somewhere, and, after making that assumption, I believed it was going to be easier and less noticeable to use the darkness as a cover.

It was a result of the consultation, and studying the plans of the warehouse, plans that showed three entrances, the main front hangar type doors, a side entrance for truck entry and exit and a small door in the rear, at the end of an internal passage leading to several offices. I also assumed it was the exit used when smokers needed a break. Our entry would be by the rear door or failing that, the side entrance where a door was built into the larger sliding doors. In both cases, the locks would not present a problem.

The change in the weather made the approach shorter, and given the density of the mist now turning into a fog, we were able to approach by the front, hugging the walls, and moving quickly while there was cover. I could feel the dampness of the mist and shivered more than once.

It was nerves more than the cold.

I could also feel rather than see the presence of Annette behind me, and once felt her breath on my neck when we stopped for a quick reconnaissance.

It was the same for McCallister’s men. I could feel them following us, quickly and quietly, and expected, if I turned around, to see him breathing down my neck too.

It added to the tension.

My plan was still to enter by the back door.

We slipped up the alley between the two sheds to the rear corner and stopped. I heard a noise coming from the rear of the building, and the light tap on the shoulder told me Annette had heard it too. I put my hand up to signal her to wait, and as a swirl of mist rolled in, I slipped around the corner heading towards where I’d last seen the glow of a cigarette.

The mist cleared, and we saw each other at the same time. He was a bearded man in battle fatigues, not the average dockside security guard.

He was quick, but my slight element of surprise was his undoing, and he was down and unconscious in less than a few seconds with barely a sound beyond the body hitting the ground. Zip ties secured his hands and legs, and tape his mouth. Annette joined me a minute after securing him.

A glance at the body then me, “I can see why they, whoever they are, sent you.”

She’d asked who I worked for, and I didn’t answer. It was best she didn’t know.

“Stay behind me,” I said, more urgency in my tone. If there was one, there’d be another.

Luck was with us so far. A man outside smoking meant no booby traps on the back door, and quite possibly there’d be none inside. But it indicated there were more men inside, and if so, it appeared they were very well trained. If that were the case, they would be formidable opponents.

The fear factor increased exponentially.

I slowly opened the door and looked in. A pale light shone from within the warehouse itself, one that was not bright enough to be detected from outside. None of the offices had lights on, so it was possible they were vacant. I realized then they had blacked out the windows. Why hadn’t someone checked this?

Once inside, the door closed behind us, progress was slow and careful. She remained directly behind me, gun ready to shoot anything that moved. I had a momentary thought for McCallister and his men, securing the perimeter.

At the end of the corridor, the extent of the warehouse stretched before us. The pale lighting made it seem like a vast empty cavern, except for a long trestle table along one side, and, behind it, stacks of wooden crates, some opened. It looked like a production line.

To get to the table from where we were was a ten-yard walk in the open. There was no cover. If we stuck to the walls, there was equally no cover and a longer walk.

We needed a distraction.

As if on cue, the two main entrances disintegrated into flying shrapnel accompanied by a deafening explosion that momentarily disoriented both Annette and I. Through the smoke and dust kicked up I saw three men appear from behind the wooden crates, each with what looked like machine guns, spraying bullets in the direction of the incoming SWAT members.

They never had a chance, cut down before they made ten steps into the building.

By the time I’d recovered, my head heavy, eyes watering and ears still ringing, I took several steps towards them, managing to take down two of the gunmen but not the third.

I heard a voice, Annette’s I think, yell out, “Oh, God, he’s got a trigger,” just before another explosion, though all I remember in that split second was a bright flash, the intense heat, something very heavy smashing into my chest knocking the wind out of me, and then the sensation of flying, just before I hit the wall.

I spent four weeks in an induced coma, three months being stitched back together and another six learning to do all those basic actions everyone took for granted. It was twelve months almost to the day when I was released from the hospital, physically, except for a few alterations required after being hit by shrapnel, looking the same as I always had.

But mentally? The document I’d signed on release said it all, ‘not fit for active duty; discharged’.

It was in the name of David Cheney. For all intents and purposes, Alistair McKenzie was killed in that warehouse, and for the first time ever, an agent left the Department, the first to retire alive.

I was not sure I liked the idea of making history.

© Charles Heath 2016-2020

Writing a book in 365 days – 329

Day 329

Tell a Dream, Lose a Reader – Why Your Aspirational Stories May Be Turning Audiences Away (And How to Fix It)

“If you can’t explain it simply, you haven’t understood it well enough.” – Albert Einstein

In the world of blogging, the line between “inspiring” and “incomprehensible” is razor‑thin. You’ve probably heard the old adage: “Tell a dream, lose a reader.” It’s a warning, not a destiny. In this post we’ll unpack why lofty, abstract storytelling can actually drive readers away, and we’ll give you a concrete roadmap to keep those dreams alive and keep your audience glued to the page.


1. The Allure of the “Dream” Narrative

Every great brand, influencer, or thought‑leader has a vision—a big picture that fuels their work. Think of Elon Musk’s Mars colony, Simon Sinek’s “Start With Why,” or a startup’s promise to “revolutionize the way people travel.”

These dreams:

  • Create emotional resonance – they tap into hopes, fears, and aspirations.
  • Differentiate the voice – a compelling vision makes you stand out in a sea of generic how‑tos.
  • Provide long‑term direction – they guide content strategy, product roadmaps, and community building.

So why would sharing a dream ever backfire?


2. When Dreams Become “Dream‑Noise”

Dream‑Heavy SymptomWhy It Turns Readers Off
Vague, lofty language (e.g., “We aim to reshape humanity”)Readers can’t picture the concrete outcome.
All‑talk, no‑action (no steps, no proof)The audience feels you’re all hype, no substance.
Ignoring the audience’s needs (talking about your mission without linking to their problems)Readers wonder, “What’s in it for me?”
Over‑long, meandering storiesAttention spans are limited; the main point gets lost.
Lack of relatable examplesPeople connect with stories they can see themselves in.

These pitfalls cause a cognitive overload: the brain wants a clear mental model, not a cloud of abstract promises. When that model is missing, the reader disengages—often before the first paragraph ends.


3. The Science Behind the Drop‑Off

  • Attention Span: Studies show the average online reader spends only 8‑10 seconds scanning a piece before deciding to stay or leave.
  • Cognitive Fluency: The brain prefers information that’s easy to process. When you bombard readers with nebulous concepts, they experience mental friction and instinctively retreat.
  • Emotional Alignment: Readers stay when they feel the story resonates with their own goals. A dream that feels distant creates an emotional gap—and gaps drive exits.

4. Turning Dream‑Talk Into Reader‑Retention Gold

Below is a step‑by‑step framework that lets you share your grand vision without losing traction.

Step 1: Anchor the Dream in a Tangible Problem

Instead of: “We’ll change the way the world thinks about sustainability.”
Try: “Every year, 1.2 billion tons of plastic end up in oceans. Our platform gives brands a zero‑waste packaging solution that cuts that number by 30 % within two years.”

Why it works: Readers instantly see the stakes and how your dream addresses a real pain point.

Step 2: Break the Vision into Three Concrete Milestones

MilestoneTimeframeReader Benefit
Prototype LaunchQ2 2025Early adopters get 20 % discount & co‑design input
Beta ScalingQ4 2025Access to analytics dashboards to track waste reduction
Full Roll‑outQ2 2026Certification as a “Zero‑Waste Partner” for marketing

Why it works: Short, numbered milestones make the journey digestible and create mini‑wins that keep readers invested.

Step 3: Weave a Relatable Human Story

  • Introduce a protagonist (real or fictional) who embodies the reader.
  • Show their struggle with the problem.
  • Demonstrate how the solution (your dream) changes their life in measurable terms.

Example: “When Maya, a boutique owner in Austin, switched to our biodegradable sleeves, she cut packaging costs by $3,200 in six months and saw a 12 % lift in repeat customers.”

Step 4: Use Concrete Data & Social Proof

  • Include stats, testimonials, or case studies that prove the dream is already moving.
  • Visuals (infographics, before/after photos) reduce abstraction and boost credibility.

Step 5: End With a Clear Call‑to‑Action (CTA) Aligned to the Dream

  • “Join our pilot program and be among the first to showcase a waste‑free storefront.”
  • “Download the free roadmap that walks you through the first step of going plastic‑free.”

Why it works: The CTA transforms inspiration into a next step—the bridge from dream to action.


5. Real‑World Examples: Dream‑Talk Done Right

BrandDream StatementHow They Ground ItResult
Patagonia“We’re in business to save our home planet.”Constantly shares specific initiatives (e.g., 1% for the Planet, repair kits, supply‑chain transparency).Loyal community of 4M+ activists; consistent sales growth.
Airbnb“Belong anywhere.”Provides concrete stories of hosts and guests, clear guidelines for community standards, and data on economic impact.150 M+ users, $5B+ annual revenue.
Tesla“Accelerate the world’s transition to sustainable energy.”Regularly releases measurable milestones (Model 3 production numbers, Supercharger network expansion).Valuation > $1 trillion, massive media buzz.

Notice how each brand starts with a bold dream, but immediately anchors it in specific, relatable, and data‑driven details. The dream becomes a promise you can see, feel, and act upon.


6. Quick Checklist: Is Your Dream Story Reader‑Friendly?

  •  Problem‑First – Do you start with the reader’s pain point?
  •  Three‑Step Roadmap – Is the vision broken into digestible milestones?
  •  Human Hook – Is there a relatable protagonist?
  •  Concrete Evidence – Do you back up claims with data or testimonials?
  •  Clear CTA – Does the post end with a next step tied to the dream?

If you tick four or more boxes, you’re on the right track. If not, it’s time to rewrite.


7. Takeaway: Dream Boldly, Write Clearly

Your audience craves big ideas—but only when those ideas are presented in a way that feels real, relevant, and actionable. The mantra becomes:

“Tell a dream, keep the reader.”

By anchoring ambition in concrete problems, breaking it into bite‑size milestones, and wrapping it in human stories, you turn a lofty vision into a magnetic narrative that inspires and converts.


Ready to Test This On Your Next Post?

  1. Draft your dream statement.
  2. Apply the five‑step framework above.
  3. Run a quick A/B test: original vs. revised version.
  4. Measure dwell time, scroll depth, and CTA clicks.

Share your results in the comments—let’s learn from each other’s journeys toward dreaming and delivering.

Happy writing, and may your dreams never lose a reader again!