Every time I close my eyes, I see something different.
I’d like to think the cinema of my dreams is playing a double feature but it’s a bit like a comedy cartoon night on Fox.
But these dreams are nothing to laugh about.
Once again there’s a new installment of an old feature, and we’re back on the treasure hunt.
…
Charlene, and speaking to Boggs
…
She had been one of the few nice girls at school and we had got along better than most. Boggs had once told me she liked me but was disappointed I hadn’t noticed her. I suppose, back then, I didn’t recognize the signs, and even now, I was still all at sea with girls.
Was she Boggs’s girlfriend? If she was, it was the best-kept secret.
“Hello Charlene,” I said when she also looked up to see who had entered the room.
“Sam.”
“Are you…”
Before I could finish she interrupted, “I’m working in the sheriff’s office, and dad asked me to keep a watch over Boggs.”
“You don’t have to be in the room,” Boggs growled. “It’s not as if I’m going anywhere.”
It was hardly a conciliatory tone. And a mental note, Boggs was uncharacteristically angry. With her, or with me?
“My father asked me to do a job, so here I stay. It’s for your protection as much as anything else.” Then, to me, “how are you, Sam?”
“Good.”
“I understand you found him on the beach belonging to the Cossatino’s. Odd place to be, Sam, for you at least?”
“Nadia and I were searching the coastline for coins with metal detectors when we stumbled over a body. Thought at first it was a beached shark.”
Boggs turned his head back. “Whose idea was it?”
Curious response and I thought about telling him it was mine, but something told me to tell the truth. “Nadia. And before you ask, no, I don’t think she had any other idea in mind because as you and I both know, there’s no access from the ocean to the shore through the reef. That much I ascertained for myself, and that goes for the whole coastline of The Grove.”
If he had looked down from the top of the cliff face, at any point along the coastline he would have seen that for himself. But, that might not always have been the case because there were almost two centuries and a lot of seismic activity in between. I’d seen the big A, but no other evidence it might be the spot, but Boggs had been there, and it was likely he knew it a likely spot too.
He nodded, which meant he had checked himself, which gave him a reason for being at The Grove, but not finishing up where he’d landed. There was something else in his expression and had I not had the knowledge I had, I would have ignored it.
“Why look for coins then?”
“Something to do, I guess, since you’ve stopped asking me to help you. That and doing a little investigation on the side. I’m amazed at just how much information there is out there, and it’s a battle to sort fact from fiction. And I didn’t have the head start you have.”
“You do realize Nadia is a Cossatino. You can’t be consorting with the enemy.”
“I thought she was just someone to hang out with since we hadn’t hit it off at school. In case you didn’t notice, she hasn’t been around these parts for several years, going to Italy to get away from the family. But, I get it, she’s still a Cossatino, or so everyone keeps telling me, and not someone I should be associating with. You’re not the only one issuing dire warnings.”
“That’s your problem, Sam, you see the good in everyone, even if they’re bad.”
“Should I apply that theory to you. You don’t finish up unconscious on a beach where you’re not supposed to be. What happened?”
I could practically see the wheels turning while he formulated an excuse he thought I would buy, then said, “I slipped and fell, something that shouldn’t have happened?”
“Not unless you’d been seen and the Cossatino’s were either coming to get you or were chasing you?”
He didn’t answer perhaps knowing Charlene was there to get answers, but his expression told me it was close to the truth.
“No. Slipped, a fundamental error setting up. I was simply sloppy.”
“You were trespassing.”
“I was practicing my skills, and it’s the best rockface along the coast for exactly that. It’s not the first time I’ve tried.”
OK, we weren’t going to get past the ‘I was practicing mantra’, so I moved on to the next question, “Where have you been lately?”
“The caves in the hills, and trying a bit of climbing there, too.”
“You shouldn’t be doing it alone.”
“I wouldn’t have to if my so-called friend wasn’t cavorting with a snake.”
Being confined to home because despite the conquering of COVID, it’s still out there and we have to live with it – something in my condition I can’t take too many risks with – not only gives me, and a lot of others more time to write, it also enables us to explore a few more leisure options to fill in the time.
After all, we can hardly just keep writing endlessly.
Well, perhaps some of us could.
At first, I decided I would do some virtual travelling, you know, go to places I would never go in person, like South Africa, Kenya, Egypt, South America, you know the sort of places I mean, the ones where you can’t get travel insurance cover, or not without mortgaging your home.
That lasted about a day. Seeing the pyramids online was not the same as being there, getting the sand blown in your face, or the tour bus being hijacked, and you spend the next three months in a dark, hot, hell hole while the kidnappers negotiate with governments that refuse to negotiate with terrorists.
So far, I’m not filling in my time very well.
There are weeds to be pulled, lawns to be cut, shrubs and trees to be pruned, painting to be done, you know, all of those chores that you put off until tomorrow, knowing tomorrow will never come.
Don’t ask me to explain that.
So, we’re left with television.
Firstly there was a series called Yellowstone, a western in a modern setting, three series worth. Yes, we watched all of them, no, didn’t like the swearing, or Beth Dutton, Rip was channelling the Duke (John Wayne), and Kevin Costner, well, his stint in Dances with Wolves stood him in good stead.
Geez though, how much trouble can one ranch attract? Indians, speculators, developers, and an international airport? To be honest, at times it spiralled out of control, but for sheer entertainment value, it was slightly better than I thought it might be. As for Jamie, how could one person be so complicated?
Then there was another series, Away. OK, this was about as far-fetched as a premise could get, and the characters, as diverse, and sometimes as obtuse as any I’ve seen thrown together for over eight months. Thank god we didn’t have to suffer eight months of it.
It was good, I guess, with people being the way they are, and I’d expected in the confines of that small space for so long, they might have killed each other off one at a time, like in Lord of the Flies, but no such luck.
My favourite? The Russian. He might have been blind but he was interesting. Just would have liked a few subtitles for us non-Ghana, Chinese, Russian, and Indian people.
As for White House Farm, I’m still trying to work out who killed them all, because it definitely wasn’t the daughter. It had to be the indifferent son, or at his behest. Full marks to the dogged detective, who, the last time I saw him, he was a rather improbable Hercules. Funny how your impression of a performance goes back to one you’ve seen him before.
Which is another of our viewing interests, watching a show and trying to work out where we’ve seen the actors before. Some are familiar and seem to be in everything, others rarely seen, or remembered. I hope this is not a sign of their acting talent, or more to the point, lack of it.
At the moment we are in the middle of Young Wallender. Those who may have seen Branagh in the Wallender series would remember this as being the most stultifying of series, filmed bleakly in a bleak country with bleak characters, and bleak crimes.
Fortunately, the Young Wallender series is not as bleak, but it has dark undertones. Some might call this gritty. There are four more to go so it can only get better.
Like jumping off a ten-storey building, it’s so far so good…
Where the Muse Strikes: Unearthing Your Most Comfortable Writing Nook
We’ve all been there. Staring at a blank screen, a half-finished manuscript, or a sudden spark of inspiration that demands to be captured. But where, oh where, do we find that perfect, almost magical, spot that unlocks our creative flow? It’s a question that sparks endless curiosity among writers, and the answers are as varied and unique as the stories we tell.
Is it the hushed reverence of a dedicated office, a sanctuary meticulously designed for productivity? Perhaps it’s a room with a breathtaking ocean view, where the rhythmic crash of waves whispers tales of distant lands. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s the allure of a dark, atmospheric basement, a place where shadows play and spooky narratives can truly come to life.
For some, inspiration might strike in the most unexpected of places. The hustle and bustle of a train station, with its constant movement and transient characters, could be a fertile ground for observation and storytelling. Even the familiar confines of work, while potentially rife with its own unique set of challenges, might surprisingly serve as a launchpad for that next great idea.
My own writing journey has seen a few different homes. My current dedicated space is a converted garage, a cozy nook lined with the comforting presence of countless books. It’s a space brimming with potential, though I must admit, it’s not always the most serene. A certain smart-aleck cat seems to have a knack for demanding attention right when a crucial plot point is about to unfold, adding an unpredictable element to my creative process.
When the feline supervisor is temporarily distracted, or when the late-night hour beckons, I often find myself drawn to the couch in the living room. There, amidst the quiet hum of the house, I can sometimes wrestle a thousand words from the depths of my imagination, the narrative flowing with a surprising ease, cat-related interruptions notwithstanding.
Then there are the times when the muse arrives disguised as a delicious meal. A cafe or restaurant can be an irresistible lure. It often starts innocently enough, with me scribbling notes on the ambiance, the food, the fascinating people around me. But before I know it, those observations morph into something more, drawing me deeper into the story and, on occasion, landing me in hot water with my patient dining companions. It seems a bit of intense introspection can sometimes be mistaken for complete disengagement from the present company!
And let’s not forget the technological marvels that have infiltrated our lives. The advent of writing programs for mobile phones is a double-edged sword. While they offer unparalleled portability, they also blur the lines between downtime and work, and frankly, sometimes I wonder if these devices have become too smart, outsmarting our own intentions with their constant connectivity and endless distractions. But hey, that’s a whole other story for another day, isn’t it?
So, where do you find your most comfortable writing place? Is it a grand study, a quiet corner of a coffee shop, or perhaps the backseat of a moving vehicle? Share your secret writing sanctuaries in the comments below – let’s inspire each other to find that perfect spot where our words can truly soar!
Tired Tropes: Why It’s Time to Retire “Smart as a Whip,” “Light as a Feather,” and “dumb as a rock” (And What to Use Instead)
We’ve all been there. You’re in the flow of writing a scene, drafting a marketing email, or chatting with a friend, and a familiar phrase drops off your fingertips.
She was light as a feather.He was smart as a whip.That idea is dumb as a rock.
They’re comfortable. They’re automatic. And, frankly, they are dead on arrival.
In copywriting and creative writing alike, clichés are the fast-food of language: they fill a craving instantly, but they leave your audience feeling uninspired and unsatisfied. When we rely on tired idioms, we trade specific imagery for lazy shorthand.
If you want to elevate your writing, boost your SEO engagement by reducing bounce rates (readers stick around longer for original prose!), and captivate your audience, it’s time to banish these three overused similes.
Let’s break down why they fail, and explore fresh, vibrant alternatives that will make your writing pop.
Cliche #1: “Smart as a Whip”
Why It Fails
Where did this even come from? A leather strap attached to a handle doesn’t exactly scream “cognitive genius.” While etymologists debate its origins—some point to the snap of a whip representing quickness, others to a “smart” (stinging) lash—the phrase has been beaten to death. It’s a vague umbrella term that tells your reader someone is intelligent without showing how that intelligence manifests.
Fresh Alternatives
Intelligence isn’t a monolith. A person can be mathematically gifted, socially brilliant, or quick on their feet. Show your reader the flavor of their smarts:
For quick-wittedness: Sharp as a tack, quick-silver, nimble-minded, brilliantly agile.
For deep intellect: Encyclopedic, sagacious, razor-sharp, intellectually voracious.
In a sentence: Instead of “She was smart as a whip during the negotiation,” try:“She sliced through the corporate jargon with surgical precision, anticipating counter-arguments before they even left the room.”
Cliché #2: “Light as a Feather”
Why It Fails
Unless you are literally writing a scientific paper about avian plumage, “light as a feather” is completely devoid of sensory detail. It’s a ghost of a description. It doesn’t help the reader feel the weightlessness; it just tells them the math of the mass.
Fresh Alternatives
Weightlessness can be terrifying, graceful, or magical. Tap into the physical sensations of air, movement, and suspension to bring your descriptions to life:
For physical objects: Buoyant, ethereal, gossamer, weightless, vaporous, floating on a breeze.
For people or movements: Effortless, floating, unanchored, graceful as a drifted leaf.
In a sentence: Instead of “The vintage silk dress was light as a feather,” try:“The vintage silk cascaded over her skin like a second atmosphere, practically floating on the ambient air.”
Cliché #3: “Dumb as a Rock”
Why It Fails
Aside from being unoriginal, calling someone (or something) “dumb as a rock” is a blunt-force instrument. It lacks nuance, and frankly, rocks have a lot of geological history going for them—they are much more interesting than this insult implies. Relying on this phrase misses an opportunity to inject humor, vivid imagery, or specific critique into your writing.
Fresh Alternatives
If you need to describe a lack of common sense, ignorance, or a thoroughly unwise decision, you have a wealth of colorful alternatives at your disposal:
For foolishness: Clueless, vacant, dense as lead, hopelessly out-to-lunch, playing checkers in a chess grandmaster tournament.
For bad ideas: Ill-conceived, half-baked, structurally unsound, a house of cards.
In a sentence: Instead of “That business strategy is dumb as a rock,” try:“That business strategy was about as seaworthy as a screen-door canoe.”
How to Spot Clichés in Your Own Writing
Writing without clichés isn’t about never using a common phrase again; it’s about developing an editor’s eye for autopilot writing. The next time you edit your work, run this quick mental check:
The “First Thought” Test: If a phrase or comparison pops into your head immediately, it probably popped into a million other writers’ heads, too. Pause, delete it, and force yourself to brainstorm three alternative descriptions.
Appeal to the Senses: Clichés are abstract. Real writing is sensory. Does your description sound, smell, look, feel, or taste like something specific?
Show, Don’t Tell: Instead of telling us someone is “smart as a whip” or a concept is “dumb as a rock,” show us the action, the consequence, or the environment that proves it.
Upgrade Your Vocabulary Today
Language is a living, breathing toolkit. When we rely on clichés like smart as a whip, light as a feather, and dumb as a rock, we dull our tools. Swap them out for specific, evocative, and surprising alternatives, and watch your writing instantly transform from generic to unforgettable.
What’s your least favorite cliché? Drop it in the comments below along with your favorite alternative!
This story has been ongoing since I was seventeen, and just to let you know, I’m 72 this year.
Yes, it’s taken a long time to get it done.
Why, you might ask.
Well, I never gave it much interest because I started writing it after a small incident when I was 17, and working as a book packer for a book distributor in Melbourne
At the end of my first year, at Christmas, the employer had a Christmas party, and that year, it was at a venue in St Kilda.
I wasn’t going to go because at that age, I was an ordinary boy who was very introverted and basically scared of his own shadow and terrified by girls.
Back then, I would cross the street to avoid them
Also, other members of the staff in the shipping department were rough and ready types who were not backwards in telling me what happened, and being naive, perhaps they knew I’d be either shocked or intrigued.
I was both adamant I wasn’t coming and then got roped in on a dare.
Damn!
So, back then, in the early 70s, people looked the other way when it came to drinking, and of course, Dutch courage always takes away the concerns, especially when normally you wouldn’t do half the stuff you wouldn’t in a million years
I made it to the end, not as drunk and stupid as I thought I might be, and St Kilda being a salacious place if you knew where to look, my new friends decided to give me a surprise.
It didn’t take long to realise these men were ‘men about town’ as they kept saying, and we went on an odyssey. Yes, those backstreet brothels where one could, I was told, have anything they could imagine.
Let me tell you, large quantities of alcohol and imagination were a very bad mix.
So, the odyssey in ‘The things we do’ was based on that, and then the encounter with Diana. Well, let’s just say I learned a great deal about girls that night.
Firstly, not all girls are nasty and spiteful, which seemed to be the case whenever I met one. There was a way to approach, greet, talk to, and behave.
It was also true that I could have had anything I wanted, but I decided what was in my imagination could stay there. She was amused that all I wanted was to talk, but it was my money, and I could spend it how I liked.
And like any 17-year-old naive fool, I fell in love with her and had all these foolish notions. Months later, I went back, but she had moved on, to where no one was saying or knew.
Needless to say, I was heartbroken and had to get over that first loss, which, like any 17-year-old, was like the end of the world.
But it was the best hour I’d ever spent in my life and would remain so until I met the woman I have been married to for the last 48 years.
As Henry, he was in part based on a rebel, the son of rich parents who despised them and their wealth, and he used to regale anyone who would listen about how they had messed up his life
If only I’d come from such a background!
And yes, I was only a run away from climbing up the stairs to get on board a ship, acting as a purser.
I worked for a shipping company and they gave their junior staff members an opportunity to spend a year at sea working as a purser on a cargo ship that sailed between Melbourne, Sydney and Hobart in Australia.
One of the other junior staff members’ turn came, and I would visit him on board when he would tell me stories about life on board, the officers, the crew, and other events. These stories, which sounded incredible to someone so impressionable, were a delight to hear.
Alas, by that time, I had tired of office work and moved on to be a tradesman at the place where my father worked.
It proved to be the right move, as that is where I met my wife. Diana had been right; love would find me when I least expected it.
Tired Tropes: Why It’s Time to Retire “Smart as a Whip,” “Light as a Feather,” and “dumb as a rock” (And What to Use Instead)
We’ve all been there. You’re in the flow of writing a scene, drafting a marketing email, or chatting with a friend, and a familiar phrase drops off your fingertips.
She was light as a feather.He was smart as a whip.That idea is dumb as a rock.
They’re comfortable. They’re automatic. And, frankly, they are dead on arrival.
In copywriting and creative writing alike, clichés are the fast-food of language: they fill a craving instantly, but they leave your audience feeling uninspired and unsatisfied. When we rely on tired idioms, we trade specific imagery for lazy shorthand.
If you want to elevate your writing, boost your SEO engagement by reducing bounce rates (readers stick around longer for original prose!), and captivate your audience, it’s time to banish these three overused similes.
Let’s break down why they fail, and explore fresh, vibrant alternatives that will make your writing pop.
Cliche #1: “Smart as a Whip”
Why It Fails
Where did this even come from? A leather strap attached to a handle doesn’t exactly scream “cognitive genius.” While etymologists debate its origins—some point to the snap of a whip representing quickness, others to a “smart” (stinging) lash—the phrase has been beaten to death. It’s a vague umbrella term that tells your reader someone is intelligent without showing how that intelligence manifests.
Fresh Alternatives
Intelligence isn’t a monolith. A person can be mathematically gifted, socially brilliant, or quick on their feet. Show your reader the flavor of their smarts:
For quick-wittedness: Sharp as a tack, quick-silver, nimble-minded, brilliantly agile.
For deep intellect: Encyclopedic, sagacious, razor-sharp, intellectually voracious.
In a sentence: Instead of “She was smart as a whip during the negotiation,” try:“She sliced through the corporate jargon with surgical precision, anticipating counter-arguments before they even left the room.”
Cliché #2: “Light as a Feather”
Why It Fails
Unless you are literally writing a scientific paper about avian plumage, “light as a feather” is completely devoid of sensory detail. It’s a ghost of a description. It doesn’t help the reader feel the weightlessness; it just tells them the math of the mass.
Fresh Alternatives
Weightlessness can be terrifying, graceful, or magical. Tap into the physical sensations of air, movement, and suspension to bring your descriptions to life:
For physical objects: Buoyant, ethereal, gossamer, weightless, vaporous, floating on a breeze.
For people or movements: Effortless, floating, unanchored, graceful as a drifted leaf.
In a sentence: Instead of “The vintage silk dress was light as a feather,” try:“The vintage silk cascaded over her skin like a second atmosphere, practically floating on the ambient air.”
Cliché #3: “Dumb as a Rock”
Why It Fails
Aside from being unoriginal, calling someone (or something) “dumb as a rock” is a blunt-force instrument. It lacks nuance, and frankly, rocks have a lot of geological history going for them—they are much more interesting than this insult implies. Relying on this phrase misses an opportunity to inject humor, vivid imagery, or specific critique into your writing.
Fresh Alternatives
If you need to describe a lack of common sense, ignorance, or a thoroughly unwise decision, you have a wealth of colorful alternatives at your disposal:
For foolishness: Clueless, vacant, dense as lead, hopelessly out-to-lunch, playing checkers in a chess grandmaster tournament.
For bad ideas: Ill-conceived, half-baked, structurally unsound, a house of cards.
In a sentence: Instead of “That business strategy is dumb as a rock,” try:“That business strategy was about as seaworthy as a screen-door canoe.”
How to Spot Clichés in Your Own Writing
Writing without clichés isn’t about never using a common phrase again; it’s about developing an editor’s eye for autopilot writing. The next time you edit your work, run this quick mental check:
The “First Thought” Test: If a phrase or comparison pops into your head immediately, it probably popped into a million other writers’ heads, too. Pause, delete it, and force yourself to brainstorm three alternative descriptions.
Appeal to the Senses: Clichés are abstract. Real writing is sensory. Does your description sound, smell, look, feel, or taste like something specific?
Show, Don’t Tell: Instead of telling us someone is “smart as a whip” or a concept is “dumb as a rock,” show us the action, the consequence, or the environment that proves it.
Upgrade Your Vocabulary Today
Language is a living, breathing toolkit. When we rely on clichés like smart as a whip, light as a feather, and dumb as a rock, we dull our tools. Swap them out for specific, evocative, and surprising alternatives, and watch your writing instantly transform from generic to unforgettable.
What’s your least favorite cliché? Drop it in the comments below along with your favorite alternative!
Williams’ Restaurant, East 65th Street, New York, Saturday, 8:00 p.m.
We met the Blaines at Williams’, a rather upmarket restaurant that the Blaines frequently visited and had recommended.
Of course, during the taxi ride there, Alison reminded me that with my new job, we would be able to go to many more places like Williams’. It was, at worst, more emotional blackmail, because as far as Alison was concerned, we were well on our way to posh restaurants, the Trump Tower Apartments, and the trappings of the ‘executive set’.
It would be a miracle if I didn’t strangle Elaine before the night was over. It was she who had filled Alison’s head with all this stuff and nonsense.
Aside from the half-frown, half-smile, Alison was looking stunning. It had been months since she had last dressed up, and she was especially wearing the dress I’d bought her for our 5th anniversary that cost a month’s salary. On her, it was worth it, and I would have paid more if I had to. She had adored it and me, for a week or so after.
For tonight, I think I was close to getting back on that pedestal.
She had the looks and figure to draw attention, the sort movie stars get on the red carpet, and when we walked into the restaurant, I swear there were at least five seconds of silence, and many more gasps.
I even had a sudden loss of breath earlier in the evening when she came out of the dressing room. Once more, I was reminded of how lucky I was that she had agreed to marry me. Amid all those self-doubts, I couldn’t believe she had loved me when there were so many others out there who were more appealing.
Elaine was out of her seat and came over just as the Head Waiter hovered into sight. She personally escorted Alison to the table, allowing me to follow like the Queen’s consort, while she and Alison basked in the admiring glances of the other patrons.
More than once, I heard the muted question, “Who is she?”
Jimmy stood, we shook hands, and then we sat together. It was not the usual boy, girl, boy, girl seating arrangement. Jimmy and I on one side and Elaine and Alison on the other.
The battle lines were drawn.
Jimmy was looking fashionable, with a permanent blade one beard, unkempt hair, and a designer dinner suit that looked like he’d slept in it. Alison insisted I wear a tuxedo, and I looked like the proverbial penguin or just a thinner version of Alfred Hitchcock.
The bow tie had been slightly crooked, but just before we stepped out, she had straightened it. And took the moment to look deeply into my soul. It was one of those moments when words were not necessary.
Then it was gone.
I relived it briefly as I sat and she looked at me. A penetrating look that told me to ‘behave’.
When we were settled, Elaine said, in that breathless, enthusiastic manner of hers when she was excited, “So, Harry, you are finally moving up.” It was not a question, but a statement.
I was not sure what she meant by ‘finally’, but I accepted it with good grace. Sometimes, Elaine was prone to using figures of speech I didn’t understand. I guessed she was talking about the new job. “It was supposed to be a secret.”
She smiled widely. “There are no secrets between Al and me, are there, Al?”
I looked at ‘Al’ and saw a brief look of consternation.
I was not sure Alison liked the idea of being called Al. I tried it once and was admonished. But it was interesting that her ‘best friend forever’ was allowed that distinction when I was not. It was, perhaps, another indicator of how far I’d slipped in her estimation.
Perhaps, I thought, it was a necessary evil. As I understood it, the Blaines were our mentors at the Trump Tower, because they didn’t just let ‘anyone’ in. I didn’t ask if the Blaines thought we were just ‘anyone’ before I got the job offer.
And then there was that look between Alison and Elaine, quickly stolen before Alison realised I was looking at both of them. I was out of my depth, in a place I didn’t belong, with people I didn’t understand. And yet, apparently, Alison did. I must have missed the memo.
“No,” Alison said softly, stealing a glance in my direction, “No secrets between friends.”
No secrets. Her look conveyed something else entirely.
The waiter brought champagne, Krug, and poured glasses for each of us. It was not the cheap stuff, and I was glad I brought a couple of thousand dollars with me. We were going to need it.
Then, a toast.
To a new job and a new life.
“When did you decide?” Elaine was effusive at the best of times, but with the champagne, it was worse.
Alison had a strange expression on her face. It was obvious she had told Elaine it was a done deal, even before I’d made up my mind. Perhaps she’d assumed I might be ‘refreshingly honest’ in front of Elaine, but it could also mean she didn’t really care what I might say or do.
Instead of consternation, she looked happy, and I realised it would be churlish, even silly, if I made a scene. I knew what I wanted to say. I also knew that it would serve little purpose provoking Elaine or upsetting Alison. This was not the time or the place. Alison had been looking forward to coming here, and I was not going to spoil it.
Instead, I said, smiling, “When I woke up this morning and found Alison missing. If she had been there, I would not have noticed the water stain on the roof above our bed, and decided there and then how much I hated the place.” I used my reassuring smile, the one I used with the customers when all hell was breaking loose, and the forest fire was out of control. “It’s the little things. They all add up until one day …” I shrugged. “I guess that one day was today.”
I saw an incredulous look pass between Elaine and Alison, a non-verbal question; perhaps, is he for real? Or, I told you he’d come around.
I had no idea the two were so close.
“How quaint,” Elaine said, which just about summed up her feelings towards me. I think, at that moment, I lost some brownie points. It was all I could come up with at short notice.
“Yes,” I added, with a little more emphasis than I wanted. “Alison was off to get some studying in with one of her friends.”
“Weren’t the two of you off to the Hamptons, a weekend with some friends?” Jimmy piped up and immediately got the ‘shut up, you fool’ look that cut that line of conversation dead. Someone forgot to feed Jimmy his lines.
It was followed by the condescending smile from Elaine, and “I need to powder my nose. Care to join me, Al?”
A frown, then a forced smile for her new best friend. “Yes.”
I watched them leave the table and head in the direction of the restroom, looking like they were in earnest conversation. I thought ‘Al’ looked annoyed, but I could be wrong.
I had to say Jimmy looked more surprised than I did.
There was that odd moment of silence between us, Jimmy still smarting from his death stare, and for me, the Alison and Elaine show. I was quite literally gob-smacked.
I drained my champagne glass, gathering some courage and turned to him. “By the way, we were going to have a weekend away, but this legal tutorial thing came up. You know Alison is doing her law degree.”
He looked startled when he realised I had spoken. He was looking intently at a woman several tables over from us, one who’d obviously forgotten some basic garments when getting dressed. Or perhaps it was deliberate. She’d definitely had some enhancements done.
He dragged his eyes back to me. “Yes. Elaine said something or other about it. But I thought she said the tutor was out of town and it had been postponed until next week. Perhaps I got it wrong. I usually do.”
“Perhaps I’ve got it wrong.” I shrugged as the dark thoughts started swirling in my head again. “This week or next, what does it matter?”
Of course, it mattered to me, and I digested what he said with a sinking heart. It showed there was another problem between Alison and me; she might have been telling me lies. If what he said was true and I had no reason to doubt him, where was she going tomorrow morning, and had she really been with a friend studying today?
We poured some more champagne, had a drink, then he asked, “This promotion thing, what’s it worth?”
“Trouble, I suspect. Definitely more money, but less time at home.”
“Oh,” raised eyebrows. Obviously, the women had not talked about the job in front of him, or, at least, not all the details. “You sure you want to do that?”
At last, the voice of reason. “Me? No.”
“Yet you accepted the job.”
I sucked in a breath or two while I considered whether I could trust him. Even if I couldn’t, I could see my ship was sinking, so it wouldn’t matter what I told him, or what Elaine might find out from him. “Jimmy, between you and me, I haven’t as yet decided one way or another. To be honest, I won’t know until I go up to Barclay’s office and he asks me the question.”
“Barclay?”
“My boss.”
“Elaine’s doing a job for a Barclay who recently moved into the tower a block down from us. I thought I recognised the name.”
“How did Elaine get the job?”
“Oh, Alison put him onto her.”
“When?”
“A couple of months ago. Why?”
I shrugged and tried to keep a straight face, while my insides were churning up like the wake of a supertanker. I felt sick, faint, and wanted to die all at the same moment. “Perhaps she said something about it, but it didn’t connect at the time. Too busy with work, I expect. I think I seriously need to get away for a while.”
I could hardly breathe, my throat was constricted, and I knew I had to keep it together. I could see Elaine and Alison coming back, so I had to calm down. I sucked in some deep breaths and put my ‘manage a complete and utter disaster’ look on my face.
And I had to change the subject, quickly, so I said, “Jimmy, Elaine told Alison, who told me, you were something of a guru of the cause and effects of the global economic meltdown. Now, I have a couple of friends who have been expounding this theory …”
Like flicking a switch, I launched into the well-worn practice of ‘running a distraction’, like at work when we needed to keep the customer from discovering the truth. It was one of the things I was good at, taking over a conversation and pushing it in a different direction. It was salvaging a good result from an utter disaster, and if ever there was a time that it was required, it was right here, right now.
When Alison sat down and looked at me, she knew something had happened between Jimmy and me. I might have looked pale or red-faced, or angry or disappointed, but it didn’t matter. If that didn’t seal the deal for her, the fact that I took over the dining engagement did. She knew well enough that the only time I did that was when everything was about to go to hell in a handbasket. She’d seen me in action before and had been suitably astonished.
But I got into gear, kept the champagne flowing and steered the conversation, as much as one could from a seasoned professional like Elaine, and, I think, in Jimmy’s eyes, he saw the battle lines and knew who took the crown on points. Neither Elaine nor Jimmy suspected anything, and if the truth be told, I had improved my stocks with Elaine. She was at times both surprised and interested, even willing to take a back seat.
Alison, on the other hand, tried poking around the edges, and, once when Elaine and Jimmy had got up to have a cigarette outside, questioned me directly. I chose to ignore her and pretend nothing had happened, rather than tell her how much I was enjoying the evening.
She had her ‘secrets’. I had mine.
At the end of the evening, when I got up to go to the bathroom, I was physically sick from the pent-up tension and the implications of what Jimmy had told me. It took a while for me to pull myself together; so long, in fact, that Jimmy came looking for me. I told him I’d drunk too much champagne, and he seemed satisfied with that excuse. When I returned, both Alison and Elaine noticed how pale I was, but neither made any comment.
It was a sad way to end what was supposed to be a delightful evening, which, to a large degree, it was for the other three. But I had achieved what I set out to do: to play them at their own game, watching the deception once I knew there was one, as warily as a cat watches its prey.
I had also discovered Jimmy’s real calling; a professor of economics at the same University Alison was doing her law degree. It was no surprise in the end, on a night where surprises abounded, that the world could really be that small.
We parted in the early hours of the morning, a taxi whisking us back to the Lower East Side, another taking the Blaines back to the Upper West Side. But, in our case, as Alison reminded me, it would not be for much longer. She showed concern for my health and asked me what was wrong. It took all the courage I could muster to tell her it was most likely something I ate and the champagne, and that I would be fine in the morning.
She could see quite plainly it was anything other than what I told her, but she didn’t pursue it. Perhaps she just didn’t care what I was playing at.
And yet, after everything that had happened, once inside our ‘palace’, the events of the evening were discarded, like her clothing, and she again reminded me of what we had together in the early years before the problems had set in.
It left me confused and lost.
I couldn’t sleep because my mind had now gone down that irreversible path that told me I was losing her, that she had found someone else, and that our marriage was in its last death throes.
And now I knew it had something to do with Barclay.
I’m back home and this story has been sitting on a back burner for a few months, waiting for some more to be written.
The trouble is, there are also other stories to write, and I’m not very good at prioritising.
But, here we are, a few minutes opened up and it didn’t take long to get back into the groove.
Was I working for a ghost?
The question that was foremost in my mind was whether I should call Nobbin, and let him know that I’d met Severin and that his ‘information’ was on a USB.
When I’d mentioned the fact O’Connor said the evidence was somewhere, I knew this evidence was on a USB and could be in one of the hiding places O’Connor had set up with Nobbin. If not, then it had to be somewhere else, somewhere only O’Connor would know about.
Somehow, I got the impression O’Connor had not trusted either side. Yes, he was about to tell me where the evidence was, but if that was the case, it meant it was not anywhere where anyone else would know about.
Severin should have curbed his desire for execution a little, and taken O’Connor into custody, and then interrogated him. It made me wonder, briefly, why Severin would want him dead. In cases like that, it was because Severin didn’t want O’Connor to talk to me, or anyone else.
Still, he could have tranquilized O’Connor. I would not have known the difference.
That meant I had to find out more information on O’Connor.
Of course, in just saying that out loud, over a half-full glass of scotch, just to steady the nerves after seeing Severin again, made it sound almost like a running joke.
As if I would be able to find someone who was, for all intents and purposes, a ghost. That was how we were supposed to be, ghosts, to everyone we knew, including family. We could no longer talk to anyone because they might become a target used as leverage against us.
That part of my training had been the scariest. I didn’t have any friends, not real friends anyway, and no family, other than a half-brother who hated me. I had toyed with the idea of meeting him, after I’d completed the training, just to see if anyone would try to use him as leverage, and then tell them he meant nothing to me.
It was an idea, I doubt if I could do it in reality. But the thought of it gave me some measure of revenge for all the bullying he had inflicted on me when I was young. Perhaps that was why I took this job, to prove I was nothing like the person he considered me to be.
Enough of the delving into the shadowy past.
I had a problem that needed solving. How to find O’Connor.
After a long night of fitful sleep, I woke the next morning with the shreds of a plan. I’d go into the office and use their computer system to look for him. Of course, I didn’t expect that there would be any information available to an agent with my security clearance, which was basically to get in and out of the front door and log on to the computer to fill out reports and a timesheet.
It was a surprise, after what Nobbin had said about my employment, that my pass got me in the door. It did, but I had no doubt somewhere it had register my name in a log somewhere. I figured I had about half an hour before someone came checking up on me.
The same went for the computer system. There was a bank of about a dozen computers in a room where the agents could do information searches, and private work, such as reports. Three others were occupied, and none of those using them looked up when I entered the room.
Not a surprise. We were taught to keep to ourselves and say nothing about the missions we were attached to anyone else. In our line of work, secrets were paramount. We were to become consummate liars because we could never tell anyone the truth about what we did. If we wanted a cover story, we were to say we were international confidential couriers of documents for legal institutions.
It sounded interesting, but it was quite boring, or at least that was how I described it if anyone asked.
So, ignoring the others, I logged in and found I was still on the employee list. And, I still had the same level of access I had before.
I ran a search on the name O’Connor.
It came back with five documents, the first of which was his personnel record. First name, Donald. A date of birth that made him 27 years old, and an address, in Putney. I wrote it down. Marital status, single. Status, deceased. Section worked for: Eight.
There were supposedly eight sections, and the one I worked for was Seven. Out of interest, I brought up my records. It was how Severin had found me because my address was on file. But more interesting was my status, transferred, and my section, three. Was Nobbin’s section three?
I would ask if I got an opportunity to.
The other four documents were reports, most of which were redacted, or marked restricted. Or above my pay grade, whatever that was.
But, at least one thing was clear, I had not been fired, just transferred. I guess I would have to call Nobbin after all. After I visited O’Connor’s last known residence.
I wasn’t holding my breath expecting to find anything.
How many of us have skeletons in the closet that we know nothing about? The skeletons we know about generally stay there, but those we do not, well, they have a habit of coming out of left field when we least expect them.
In this case, when you see your photo on a TV screen with the accompanying text that says you are wanted by every law enforcement agency in Europe, you’re in a state of shock, only to be compounded by those same police, armed and menacing, kicking the door down.
I’d been thinking about this premise for a while after I discovered my mother had a boyfriend before she married my father, a boyfriend who was, by all accounts, the man who was the love of her life.
Then, in terms of coming up with an idea for a story, what if she had a child by him that we didn’t know about, which might mean I had a half-brother or sister I knew nothing about. It’s not an uncommon occurrence from what I’ve been researching.
There are many ways of putting a spin on this story.
Then, in the back of my mind, I remembered a story an acquaintance at work was once telling us over morning tea, that a friend of a friend had a mother who had a twin sister and that each of the sisters had a son by the same father, without each knowing of the father’s actions, both growing up without the other having any knowledge of their half brother, only to meet by accident on the other side of the world.
It was an encounter that in the scheme of things might never have happened, and each would have remained oblivious of the other.
For one sister, the relationship was over before she discovered she was pregnant, and therefore had not told the man he was a father. It was no surprise the relationship foundered when she discovered he was also having a relationship with her sister, a discovery that caused her to cut all ties with both of them and never speak to either from that day.
It’s a story with more twists and turns than a country lane!
Thrills, Spills, and just a dash of Romance 