A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 32

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

I’ve taken some time to work on a few other projects, working through the notes with ideas and getting them into some semblance of a timeline.

It seems taking time away from some of them has helped in getting a better idea of where I’m heading with them.

It seems as though I had hit an impasse on several of the stories in progress, and a lesson could be learned.  I just have to realize I’ve hit a roadblock, which sometimes isn’t readily discernable because when it happens we tend to deny we need to walk away and reset the creative juices.

As for this project, I finally understand what was bugging me for the last few days – I need to make a timeline for the revolution, and figure out where everyone is going to be, and what their role is.

Yes, there is no substitute for proper planning. After all, if this was a real revolution, it would fall apart very quickly if there was no coordination.

It just brings home the magnitude of the exercise, and it will take a few days to pull it all together. It just may be the first revolution planned using Microsoft Project.

The first case of PI Walthenson – “A Case of Working With the Jones Brothers”

This case has everything, red herrings, jealous brothers, femme fatales, and at the heart of it all, greed.

See below for an excerpt from the book…

Coming soon!

PIWalthJones1

An excerpt from the book:

When Harry took the time to consider his position, a rather uncomfortable position at that, he concluded that he was somehow involved in another case that meant very little to him.

Not that it wasn’t important in some way he was yet to determine, it was just that his curiosity had got the better of him, and it had led to this: sitting in a chair, securely bound, waiting for someone one of his captors had called Doug.

It was not the name that worried him so much, it was the evil laugh that had come after the name was spoken.

Doug what? Doug the ‘destroyer’, Doug the ‘dangerous’, Doug the ‘deadly’; there was any number of sinister connotations, and perhaps that was the point of the laugh, to make it more frightening than it was.

But there was no doubt about one thing in his mind right then: he’d made a mistake. A very big. and costly, mistake. Just how big the cost, no doubt he would soon find out.

His mother, and his grandmother, the wisest person he had ever known, had once told him never to eavesdrop.

At the time he couldn’t help himself and instead of minding his own business, listening to a one-sided conversation which ended with a time and a place. The very nature of the person receiving the call was, at the very least, sinister, and, because of the cryptic conversation, there appeared to be, or at least to Harry, criminal activity involved.

For several days he had wrestled with the thought of whether he should go. Stay on the fringe, keep out of sight, observe and report to the police if it was a crime. Instead, he had willingly gone down the rabbit hole.

Now, sitting in an uncomfortable chair, several heat lamps hanging over his head, he was perspiring, and if perspiration could be used as a measure of fear, then Harry’s fear was at the highest level.

Another runnel of sweat rolled into his left eye, and, having his hands tied, literally, it made it impossible to clear it. The burning sensation momentarily took his mind off his predicament. He cursed and then shook his head trying to prevent a re-occurrence. It was to no avail.

Let the stinging sensation be a reminder of what was right and what was wrong.

It was obvious that it was the right place and the right time, but in considering his current perilous situation, it definitely was the wrong place to be, at the worst possible time.

It was meant to be his escape, an escape from the generations of lawyers, what were to Harry, dry, dusty men who had been in business since George Washington said to the first Walthenson to step foot on American soil, ‘Why don’t you become a lawyer?” when asked what he could do for the great man.

Or so it was handed down as lore, though Harry didn’t think Washington meant it literally, the Walthenson’s, then as now, were not shy of taking advice.

Except, of course, when it came to Harry.

He was, Harry’s father was prone to saying, the exception to every rule. Harry guessed his father was referring to the fact his son wanted to be a Private Detective rather than a dry, dusty lawyer. Just the clothes were enough to turn Harry off the profession.

So, with a little of the money Harry inherited from one of his aunts, he leased an office in Gramercy Park and had it renovated to look like the Sam Spade detective agency, you know the one, Spade and Archer, and The Maltese Falcon.

There’s a movie and a book by Dashiell Hammett if you’re interested.

So, there it was, painted on the opaque glass inset of the front door, ‘Harold Walthenson, Private Detective’.

There was enough money to hire an assistant, and it took a week before the right person came along, or, more to the point, didn’t just see his business plan as something sinister. Ellen, a tall cool woman in a long black dress, or so the words of a song in his head told him, fitted in perfectly.

She’d seen the movie, but she said with a grin, Harry was no Humphrey Bogart.

Of course not, he said, he didn’t smoke.

Three months on the job, and it had been a few calls, no ‘real’ cases, nothing but missing animals, and other miscellaneous items. What he really wanted was a missing person. Or perhaps a beguiling, sophisticated woman who was as deadly as she was charming, looking for an errant husband, perhaps one that she had already ‘dispatched’.

Or for a tall, dark and handsome foreigner who spoke in riddles and in heavily accented English, a spy, or perhaps an assassin, in town to take out the mayor. The man was such an imbecile Harry had considered doing it himself.

Now, in a back room of a disused warehouse, that wishful thinking might be just about to come to a very abrupt end, with none of the romanticized trappings of the business befalling him. No beguiling women, no sinister criminals, no stupid policemen.

Just a nasty little man whose only concern was how quickly or how slowly Harry’s end was going to be.

© Charles Heath 2019

In a word: Air

Yep, another of those interesting little words that mean more than it appears.

Aside from the fact it is the air that we breathe, it can also be used to describe music.

It can be a breath of fresh air, though it’s hard to say where in this ever increasingly polluted atmosphere than we could literally draw one, except on a mountain top, where conversely it would be hard to breathe at all.

Have the air sucked out of us, well, that literally isn’t possible unless some madman comes up with a weird sort of vacuum cleaner, but that might be an episode for the X-Files.

He had an air about him, or her, as the case might be, which might refer to a sort of deference or manner.   There again that air might be one of boredom, which is what a lot of students seem to have in class.

Sorry, been a teacher, and know well the expressions on their faces.  Had one myself once, and finished up on the end of a chalkboard eraser.  Yep, in the good old day’s teachers used to chuck stuff at us recalcitrant students to get our attention, and not undergo a storm of protest from irate parents.

These days those same parents would most likely air their grievance, opinion, or view to the headmaster.

I’m guessing that same headmaster would be wishing those same parents to vanish into thin air, though I’m not sure how that would be possible.

And lastly, television stations air shows.

Weird, eh, how such a simple word can be used in so many contexts.

‘Sunday in New York’ – A beta reader’s view

I’m not a fan of romance novels but …

There was something about this one that resonated with me.

This is a novel about a world generally ruled by perception, and how people perceive what they see, what they are told, and what they want to believe.

I’ve been guilty of it myself as I’m sure we all have at one time or another.

For the main characters Harry and Alison there are other issues driving their relationship.

For Alison, it is a loss of self-worth through losing her job and from losing her mother and, in a sense, her sister.

For Harry, it is the fact he has a beautiful and desirable wife, and his belief she is the object of other men’s desires, and one in particular, his immediate superior.

Between observation, the less than honest motives of his friends, a lot of jumping to conclusions based on very little fact, and you have the basis of one very interesting story.

When it all comes to a head, Alison finds herself in a desperate situation, she realises only the truth will save their marriage.

But is it all the truth?

What would we do in similar circumstances?

Rarely does a book have me so enthralled that I could not put it down until I knew the result. They might be considered two people who should have known better, but as is often the case, they had to get past what they both thought was the truth.

And the moral of this story, if it could be said there is one, nothing is ever what it seems.

Available on Amazon here: amzn.to/2H7ALs8

Motive, means, and opportunity – Episode 1

The Jaded Detective

The victim was found just after dawn by a man walking his dog.

Detective Louis Bryson was just about to call it a day, or in this case since he was on the graveyard shift, call it a morning, when the call came in.

Why was it, he thought, that victims were always discovered by someone walking a dog.  Maybe the dog was walking them, because at that hour of the morning, if he owned a dog, he would be on autopilot.

And that was because Detective Louis Bryson was not a morning person.

He hated mornings, he hated traffic, and he hated people, especially in the morning peak hours.  Everyone always seemed angry and irritable.  It was bad enough going home, against the flow.  Worse when he had to drive out to a crime scene.

Like now.  The only thing saving his sanity was classical music.

The crime scene was a car parked in a designated parking area of the Queens Botanical Gardens.  How the car got there, who the victim was, and why the victim was there were questions he was going to ask.

He was stopped at the gate by an officer assigned to keep people out.  He showed his shield and the officer let him pass.

Crime scene investigators and the medical examiner were already on the scene, as was another detective, Sam Worthey, who was usually assigned to work with him.  Bryson was a hard man to work with, but Worthey had become used to his eccentricities.

Worthey had started walking towards the car the moment he saw Bryson pass the cordon and was at the door when Bryson stepped out.

Bryson had seen the lone car sitting off the roadway, back in rather than driven in, telling him the killer knew he had the time to do what he had to and that it was not a quick or opportunistic killing.  At first glance, this looked to be deliberate and planned.

A quick look around showed that it was unlikely there would be any witnesses who could identify the possible killer from the buildings, or the roadway that bordered the park.  He saw the man, and the dog sitting obediently by his side, who discovered the victim.

Worthey followed his eyes and when it stopped on the man he said, “The man who discovered the victim, Jack Bentine.  The dog’s name is Freddie, believe it or not, and they were going for a walk starting shortly after 7 am from a residence three streets away, on their usual early morning exercise in the park, for the dog that is, and found the deceased at approximately 7:15.  Not the best start to the day.”

“Do I need to talk to him?”

“No.  Got the details, and asked him to come to the station to sign a statement.  Pretty shaken up.”

“Then tell him to go.”

Bryson watched Worthey go over to the man, have a brief word, and then come back. 

Bentine shook his head and left with the reluctant dog.  He was going to miss out on his morning exercise.

Bryson walked towards the car and stopped about 20 feet short.  He looked closely at the ground, moving slowly towards the side of the car.  No footprints.  The surface was rough but very hard.  Pity, it hadn’t snowed overnight and left behind some very clear footprints.

He asked the investigators in and around the car to give him a few minutes, and he waited until they moved out of the way.

The door was open.  A closer look showed the man had been shot in the side of the head, blood spatter stretching to the other side of the car.

The victim was still in the driver’s seat.  The driver’s side window hadn’t been wound down, and the bullet had been shot through the glass.

So, had the killer been waiting, either in the parking space or somewhere near?  He looked around.  Nowhere to really hide.  So, was it possible the killer was waiting for the victim to arrive, which could mean the victim knew his killer?  It didn’t seem to fit the facts.  The scene seemed to Bryson to be a little off.

Another look inside the car showed the key to the car was in the driver’s hand, so that meant the victim had arrived, took the key out of the ignition, and was about to get out of the car.  Would he do that if the killer was standing in the spot?  Possibly not.  Bryson thought in the same position, he would just wind the window down, and not get out of the car.

Last night was very, very cold.

So that would mean the killer wasn’t visible to the victim when he arrived.

The victim was dressed in a suit, tie still on, so he had come from somewhere requiring formal clothing, work, a meeting, or dinner?

He took a couple of steps backward where Worthey was waiting.  He motioned the investigators to return.

“Do we know who he is?”

Worthey was holding an evidence bag with a wallet in it.  “Yes.  James Burgman, 45, currently single, but recently exiting from a very nasty divorce, in which his ex-wife is very angry.”

“And you know this because?”

“I read the newspapers.  It’s been in the news.  I didn’t need the wallet to identify him.”

“Approximate time of death?”

“Josie thinks sometime between midnight and two am.  She’ll know more when she gets the body.”

Josie was a good pathologist and was rarely wrong in her first estimation.”

“CCTV?” He had to ask just in case he missed something.

“One camera covering the carpark.” 

Worthey pointed to a spot where there were tree branches and, if he looked carefully, the metal of a pole.  Not easy to see it for the branches.

“And the bad news?”  He could detect the disappointment in Worthey’s tone.

“Casing only.  The unit has been in the repair shop for over a month waiting for a new board.  The fancier they are, the easier for them to fail.”

Or had it been sabotaged by a well-informed or well-prepared killer?  Whoever it was, this wasn’t a crime of opportunity.

“Was there a mobile phone or anything else?”

“We haven’t found one yet.”

Perhaps the killer took it to cover the fact he may have called him or left a message to come to this park.   It might be a break if Burgman had a mobile phone account.

“Right.  I’ll tackle the wife, and let her know what’s happened.  You see if you can track down a mobile phone or account, where he worked, and if possible, what he was supposed to be doing last night.”

Worthey groaned inwardly.  There was another case he was working on, but it looked like it would have to wait.  “On it.”

© Charles Heath 2023

Sayings: Going on a wild goose chase

Who hasn’t been on one of these, particularly if you have an older brother or sister, and they have nothing better to do than give you a hard time.

You know what I mean, going on a mission to find or do something, knowing full well that you won’t find it, or complete it because it was a lost cause to start with.

Yes, it goes very well with another saying, a dog chasing its tail.

We’ve seen that, too, watching the poor dog go round and round without ever achieving anything.

Sounds like my day today.

And it doesn’t stop there, the pointless search could also be described as ‘searching for a needle in a haystack’.

That is, to my mind the very definition of a living nightmare.

The origin of the idiom, well that’s a little more complicated because there isn’t just one definition.

The first:

Coined by William Shakespeare, but not necessarily in the sort of language we can read easily – it’s a bit like my ability to translate Spanish to English. It does, however, refer to a ‘wild goose chase’.

The second:

Refers to, of all things 16th Century horseracing, and because I don’t have a time machine I can’t go back to fact-check. However, it refers to the other riders following the leader around the course, in much the same formation as geese flying through the air.

My little story to go with it:

If you are good at your job, and that is beginning to be noticed, your boss will find one of these ‘wild goose chases’ just for you, in an effort to make you look bad.

It happened to me once: my task was to search the basement, where old records were stored, for a folder that a former employee had thought they had filed it in the wrong storage box, a supposition supported by the fact the folder was now needed to clear up a clerical error and the file wasn’t in the specifically marked storage box.

My job was to search every one of the other 765 boxes stored haphazardly in the basement until I found it.

It was, I was told later, sitting on his desk the whole time, and when I couldn’t find it, was going to swoop in and say he’d found it.

Of course, it went missing before he could, so he got a bollicking for not storing the files properly, and I got the job to clean up the basement. I’m not sure who got the worst punishment.

The cinema of my dreams – I always wanted to see the planets – Episode 29

Sometimes the easiest solution…

If I was to assume the recent visit by one of the so-called pirate ships as a benchmark for transporting a person between ships, then we’d have to get closer to the larger transport vessel where our crew member, logically, was being held.

The fact I was contemplating it was after the discussion with O’Mara, which, quite frankly, was like something out of a science fiction novel.

He’d started it with, “We have been working on a plan “

The same plan, I presumed, that the Lt Colonel had been referring to, only this time with more detail.

“You might not be aware that every member of this crew has a specific marker in their system that both enables us to track where they are, within a reasonable distance, and monitor their well-being.”

I was going to ask exactly what he meant by that, but amongst the reading material I’d been given before boarding, was a paper on the advances in medical science and how this related to space travel.

We all had a series of vaccinations, and I assumed one was to give us that specific marker. I suspect another was to give us nanites that would aid in our recovery as well as maintain our health in somewhat trying circumstances.

And, no, we’re were not meant to become super-soldiers, though work was being progressed on that too.

“It gives us the ability to track our people, and, yes, the two crew members’ life signs came back when we arrived here, and we are currently monitoring the scientist. That’s to say we know where she is, and that she had not been harmed.”

There was only one point about the plan that held any concern, we just didn’t transport people, not because we couldn’t, but because of the risk. Cargo was fine, but people were a little different. There had been testing, and it had worked, but then problems occurred, and it took only the slightest of issues during the transfer, for it to go wrong. After three accidental deaths, it was decided to ban it until the process could be more refined.

Of course, in line with everything else of this ship, the transporters were the latest versions with considerably upgraded hardware. The distance was still a problem, but getting a lock onto an individual was easier with the new markers provided to this crew.

We were, for all intents and purposes, guinea pigs for the new system, something else I didn’t know until now.

The question was, would she want to be transported? The fact the pirate ships were able to transport people with success was interesting given they would only have the old equipment, but they had an incentive to use it, it was a primary means for them to escape.

And that, too, had raised another issue, they had to have a marker, not necessarily the result of a vaccination, it could be a small device, and that could only be given to them by the guards, which meant it was likely the off-world prison authority was corrupt, not unheard of since it had been contracted out. It was just another paragraph in a report that was growing exponentially in size.

The Admiral was surprised to hear from me. I thought it best, in one of those cover your rear moments, to give him a heads up on what we were planning to do.

But to a more important matter I was sure he would be interested in hearing, “The trial for running at a much faster speed was a success, and that we are closer to travelling at the speed of light. But it seems we are not the first people to do so. It seems the people who stole the plutonium have the same capability.”

“The aliens?”

“No. Our scans of their ships and personnel show they are not. We believe the ships are older vessels discarded on the edge of space, refitted, and manned by escaped convicts from the Mars mining prison.” Saying it out loud didn’t quite sound the same as it had in my head.

“Or it is the result of a country that is not exactly playing by the rules that everyone agreed to for the exploration and exploitation of space.”

“So it was known we might run into some people who have another agenda?”

“Not in that direction, no.”

“Well, it seems they have a base on or under the surface of one of Uranus’s moons called Oberon. I suspect the plutonium is to fuel their base, which is far enough out of the mainstream that we might not have discovered it for years.”

“You then have to wonder why they told you about it?”

That answer was provided in a sudden and alarming manner.

“Bridge to Captain, we have three incoming vessels, and I think they are not here for a social visit.”

To the Admiral, “I have to go. Let’s hope the weapons we have are adequate.” I cut the call, saying, “Be there ASAP. Is the gunnery sergeant at her post?”

“Yes.”

“Then tell her she has permission to return fire if they attack.”

“Very good.”

I had considered why they hadn’t attacked when they had the chance earlier, but perhaps that visit was just to return the Captain’s body. If they were privy to information about our vessel, they might know of its capabilities, and not wish to engage. Of course, there was another reason, perhaps they were waiting until all three ships were free, and assume there was safety in numbers.

Whatever the reasons, we’d soon find out.

© Charles Heath 2021

A score to settle – The Second Editor’s draft – Day 31

The time has come to work on the second draft for the editor, taking into account all of the suggested changes, and there are quite a few. So much for thinking I could put in an almost flawless manuscript.

Now the pressure to write each day is over, I can take my time over the last chapters of the story.

I took the day off yesterday and spent a little time staring at the ceiling. Well, that’s my euphemism for mentally going over the story so far in my head.

I know I’m guilty of writing chapters instead of pages, and pages instead of paragraphs, so already I can see some parts of the story could do with a bit of editing, but that’s not my focus yet.

For the last few days I’ve had big band music running around in my head, and it came to me that the ball preceding the conference should have a big band playing all of those songs from the 1940s, and, in particular, Sing, Sing, Sing by Benny Goodman, In the Mood by Glenn Miller, and a few others.

Listening to it has been inspirational.

The ending has changed, and now it focuses on the two main characters. I’ve given up the notion of exacting revenge, and gone for a more happier ending if that is possible after a rebel revolt. We’ll all have to wait and see if it succeeds, who comes out on top, and whether there are any casualties.

Certainly, there will be one person who will reappear like a messiah, a man thought to be dead at the hands of the military. More than one person has said they should have killed him rather than keep him prisoner, and a few more glad that they didn’t kill him.

And like all good authors, I’m trying to write an ending that leads into a sequel, though how I can top a revolution might be just a little difficult.

And although the word count is low for two days of work, a lot of other work has gone into changing the plan, and the ending, as well as a host of notes for changes in the middle, to accommodate the ending. I might just get around to writing a white paper on ‘how to capture airports and media stations for the purpose of taking over a country’ by the end of this project.

A few days without distractions – almost impossible!

I just spent a week away in one of our favourite places, in a cottage in the hills not far from the Gold Coast in Queensland.

The location is in a valley, at the bottom of which is a small creek.  There is nothing but farming land in every direction, and it’s a place where you can luxuriate in the silence, when not being interrupted by the sounds of wildlife and farm animals.

The serenity is simply amazing.

You can use it as a base because everything you could want is no more than two hours in any direction, but for us, there is no reason to leave the cottage.  We come for relaxation and to wind completely down, away from everything.

The good news is there’s no TV, and the internet and phone coverage are terrible at best, which means you need to find alternate ways of relaxing.

I can’t tell you how good it is not to be addicted to TV news, not to have the internet calling you via social media, and not have the phone ring once in four days.  After you get past that first day of withdrawal symptoms are nearly as bad as coming down off drugs.

Except…

This time I had a mission, to take the time to finish off one of my books. The Enchanted Horse, a story I’ve been promising my grandchildren I’d finish for the last five years.

There just never seems to be time at home with all the distractions, you know those trappings of modern life, the phone, the internet, TV.

And, the good news is I managed to review, collate and generally structure the 700 odd pages I’d already written, and comprehensively outline the last few remaining chapters so I can finally finish the first draft.

The other job that became apparent about one-third of the way through, was that the story is too big for one book, and now it is three, each instalment about 300 pages long, and it gave me the opportunity to write bridging chapters, a sort of the story so far, which will also serve as synopsis I can send to prospective publishers.

All in all, huge progress was made.

Pity I could stay for a month.  I have so much that needs doing without distraction

“Echoes From The Past”, the past doesn’t necessarily stay there


What happens when your past finally catches up with you?

Christmas is just around the corner, a time to be with family. For Will Mason, an orphan since he was fourteen, it is a time for reflection on what his life could have been, and what it could be.

Until a chance encounter brings back to life the reasons for his twenty years of self-imposed exile from a life only normal people could have. From that moment Will’s life slowly starts to unravel and it’s obvious to him it’s time to move on.

This time, however, there is more at stake.

Will has broken his number one rule, don’t get involved.

With his nemesis, Eddie Jamieson, suddenly within reach, and a blossoming relationship with an office colleague, Maria, about to change everything, Will has to make a choice. Quietly leave, or finally, make a stand.

But as Will soon discovers, when other people are involved there is going to be terrible consequences no matter what choice he makes.

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